Im bored with life.. Im 27 & on the verge of just breaking out of this boring pattern Ive set for my life since I became an adult & have this urge to risk more.. like I did when I was younger.. I feel like if I keep doing what I was doing I will continue ending up with the same results in my life & Im begging for more... Ive always been a risk taker & mistake maker.. but when I turned 20 I tried to turn it all around to please my family.. but Im bored.. my life has changed drastically in the past 2 years that there seems to be no turning back to the same old same old.. in the wake of all that chaos I let go of few friends including a guy in my life I was interested in for so long who never really knew the real me only the one I allowed him to perceive... all who seemed to have been holding me back who also may have played a part in the guilt.
My teen years consisted of me running away... taking risks I wasnt really a trouble maker but I was involved with people who society may have viewed as wrong for me but truly I loved them & them me... it didnt matter what the world thought of us as long as it was us.. We spoke our own language & accepted eachother the way we were & nothing more.. they inspired me...
Now here I am 7 years later... realizing Im the one who left the pack... maybe it was best.. but now I find myself finding a group of people & a man I am so in love with but my head is telling me he is all wrong... (My life is flashing before my eyes) Ive gone through so much these past 2 years coming to the realization Ive lived only for the expactations of my family.. feared risks.. feared shaking things up... Ive become clearly invisible & hidden in the shadows of my family...
I know that I can make it on my own if all my life falls apart again.. but doing what Ive been doing is not getting me the results I want out of life
Im not trying to be rebellious Im trying to gain my life back my direction my freedom.. and make my own way... No wander Ive relied so much on my family to give me direction these past years because its not my path and my intuition has been speaking differently
Could anyone do a reading on me? Maybe give me some insight? Please no reading on my guy... only some insight