he's trying to take the control BACK...cancerian men have a hard time with the balance of control - hence the emotional blackmail, manipulation, etc. a word, a color, a sound can set them off. you may never know - but telling you will relinquish the control over his emotions.
don't get me wrong, i have a my own little crabcake problems...it's just a lot easier to see it from the other side of the fence. someone wrote a thread on another site that cancerian men cause women to be psychotic. i've never been so emotional, obsessive, insecure and downright batty for any man in my life (except for my first love in high school, but that's normal). i NEVER let him see this though...and i can only imagine that he is in the same boat. it's hard to give yourself up to somebody 100%. which is why i think we all seek the love like when we had our first love - which was the only time i did it.
and in regards to the mid-season replacement? def don't turn to the guy that may have stirred all of this up to begin with. that will really drive your crab away, and cause lots of pain and unnecessary drama. crabs HATE the drama.
it sounds like he's got a serious amount of issues to work through and that he's retaliating against something. these are actions of someone who is fighting something internally that isn't ready to admit or release it. think about it.