Dear redzalez, You said that you were always trying to change her; but, you didn't say how. You didn't mention if the requests you made were reasonable or demanding and picky. From what you said, you don't sound picky. You sound overly giving, too eager to please and willing to do more than your part to try and keep a relationship going. If what you say is true as far as your girlfriend going from hot to cold, she sounds like she likes to play games and to be in control. You, again if what you state is accurate, sound like you are willing to twist into a pretzel to please her. This is not a relationship you want. This is not a relationship where "you" can thrive. While, you do have a child with this woman, it sounds best if you go through the legal system for your rights as her father for visitations; but, leave behind any thoughts of a relationship with the mother. We cannot change someone's basic personality. Your ex "sounds" like she could have some emotional problems, unresolved issues, etc. You sound like you were caught in the middle of them and perhaps tried to "makeup" for what you thought was causing her behavior. You can't. Bless her, send her the white light and concentrate on seeing your daughter. Pursuing this lady will probably only continue to cause you sorrow. You might want to find out why you were/are willing to do just about "anything and everything" for another in order to have a relationship. Strengthen yourself first before pursuing "any" relationship with a woman. Concentrate on you and your daughter. Best of luck. Webs We Weave