@Jenever7 I stubbled upon this thread in researching the Virgo Man I have been "dating" on and off for almost two years.
I have experienced pretty much every emotion in some form or the other as the first 27 pages of @dttn circumstances.
Let me start by saying the advice both of you give is so genuine. I am actually ashamed to even tell my friends about the drama of my "boyfriend" because I have let CONSTANT disrespect become a norm for him. I am going to take the Ruin advice and meditate with these! (I just ordered a set and I am beyond exited.)
I think of all the time I have wasted and then need to realize that we are all broken in some sort of way and tarnished from our past marriage(s)/relationships. The one I am writing about is one that I have been weakened by the most.
I have ALWAYS been a Master Manipulator of Men per se. I am a Scorpio and I tend to have men at my beck and call-All but this Virgo. His Birthday is 8/31/74 and mine is 11/04/1978.
Here's my story: PLEASE shed light on my situation and any and all advice will be taken to heart.
I typically alway date super fit and super unemotional men because I USED to be very unemotionally attached to men. I have always taken great pride in my independence... However, My Virgo has taken me on the worst roller coaster ride of my life. In fact, I tell him, "You ruined my life! I am angry and bitter-JUST like you! I was NEVER like this before I met you! Every day I hate you more and more!" This is actually pretty light in comparison to the words we both utter daily.
He has been financially taking care of me as my business has gone through a lot of challenges with the pandemic. I believe that the guilt of him knowing that he was caught in so many lies and made the mistake of introducing his mother into our "relationship." Her guilt has made him feel obligated to financially support me or perhaps his own guilt.
He is 47 Never been married and has no children. He is easily angered, a control freak, emotionally messed up from verbal abuse from his father, no nonsense, unforgiving, etc etc He has been abandoned and taken advantage of by pretty much all of his long-term friends- he says with "no explanation" they just fall off and cease all communication with him... I tell him it is bc he vibrates at such a low level and bc his intentions are not pure.
However, his actions are very caring and loving (at times). He has been telling me that we are not together and have not been since September, yet always is sending the night or vice versa at one another's place. BUT, he has been withholding sex for about 4 months, except when we are both intoxicated.
I am a Scorpio and I have needs-I have been sleeping with my Past Friends with Benefits. Which is purely sexual and we do our business and we go our separate ways.
For some reason I hold on to My Virgo and feel obligated to make things work and still hang on...... I am now to the point, that I can no longer be a doormat for dirt and for him to wipe his dirty shoes on per se.
He was a habitual online dater and I have caught him several times, especially in the beginning and I put my foot down-kicked him out a few times and made him Block and cease communication with other female friends.
He began working out a lot, had hair regrowth treatments and we both have now been vaccinated for COVID. He is doing exactly what I was accusing him of about 4 months ago and he is doing his own thing. Although he denies it, yet I am very intuitive and I know he is a predator.
He has left me brokenhearted, with a very low self image which I NEVER had prior. I used to be so witty and so go with the flow-had magnetic energy and was always the life of a party. As I stated before- he has turned me into him!
Please please please help me get my groove back! I need to have my self esteem back and more importantly my dignity. I want to match his energy and play the same mind games he started, yet I will finish and be 100000000 times better than he EVER was. I am hoping, with both of your help.
We have a 7 month old puppy which he bought when he was 3 weeks old bc my daughter decided to take back the puppy she left with me for 8 months and I was devastated bought me Spikey! I love this little guy bc he is the purest and ONLY form of emotional support and love I receive.
FYI: I was abandoned three times before I was 8 months old. My both mother abandoned me at two days old. I was immediately placed in foster care and was adopted at 3 weeks old, however it took several months for my paperwork t be processed which allowed me to come to the US. I was 8 months old and arrived in the US on 7/04. My mother says when my entire family gathered for my arrival and for the 4th of July I was numb-without any emotions. Then about three months later, my Dad went out of town for several months for Business and my Mom said all I did was cry!
I have two girls and my Mom sends my oldest daughter messages about being born and raised by a Narcissistic Mother. Since the trauma I experienced before 12 months old-I can see some characteristics of my hardened shell.
Please help me! I want to be a better person! I want to know how do I pick up the pieces and begin to piece myself back together? Do I just disappear? Do I communicate with My Virgo? How should I approach the fact he is babysitting Spike often when I have to work late? What abut my financial dependence on him?
I am desperate for answers, guidance and genuine advice from someone who understands my pain, constant feelings of rejection and hurt feelings by a man incapable of living another human being.
Thank you so much for listening! I need to focus my time and energy into my business and not wasting reading or writing what to do to save "Non-Relationship with my Non-Boyfriend"
Thank you for listening