I don't see an edit button but, I forgot to mention he wants to leave her and insisted on her having an affair to her in the past. I believe this to be a way out for him so he doesn't have to give her anything and that's the only reason they are in the same home. They are more or less roommates at this point
thelucid
@thelucid
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RE: What to do now
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What to do now
Hello everyone,
I'm a cancer man who is involved with a Taurus female. Before you judge please understand I had no intentions for this to happen but, it did. I already feel bad enough about it and you can't choose the one your attracted to.
We work at the same place and she's in a horrible marriage. The husband has cheated on her the entire time and is mentally abusive to her. She's said to me that the only reason she stayed with him is because of their children and she doesn't know how to survive without his income.
Over the past couple of months we always flirted with each other every chance we got. Things eventually happened between her and I and now I'm falling deep for her. The other day I expressed my true feelings to her because, I felt the need to get it out. Her reaction was that she was in unfamiliar territory and that she's never opened her self up to anyone that much before (which us the same for me) and that I left her speechless.
Now she seems really brief in our conversations and is ignoring me a little. I'm just standing back because I'm scared, waiting to see what she's going to do. I know I should just walk away because it's wrong but, It happened and my heart is to strong for her to just walk away. So what do I do now.
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
snowball543, Thank you so much for that input it does give a different perspective.
patchlove, I've tried talking to her mother in a respectful manner but, her mother didn't want to hear it and attacked me verbally. Basics being her calling me childish, selfish, and controlling along with many other not very nice statements that I won't say. Then I messed up and told her that her actions, having never met me nor ever spoken with me were childish, selfish, and controlling. And that there was going to come a point when her daughter is going to take control of her life and her as a mother is going to drive her away.
crazycap thank you and that's what I'm trying to do. I is just difficult due to I tried to play it out differently this time with someone. And let my guard completely down. I was fully out of my shell so to speak. I wish I could be a helping hand to her but, for now all the help I can give her is to not contact her any further. I've made my attempts to contact her, apologize with detail of what I thought I did. The ball is on her court now she has to do with it as she wants to. You caps are as difficult as us cancers, total opposites. I lead with 90% of my feelings and you lead with 90% logic, or so it seems
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
Also My response was related to a poem she wrote for me:
She gives him a sweet, tender kiss on the tip of his lips.
as she disappears into the moonlight.
Left with a simple caress and the scent of a cherry blossom.
The feelings of lust, vulnerability and comfort.
Wild emotions that makes his heart skip a beat.
And the complexity of a relationship makes her feel weak.
The power of seduction and the feelings of love,
Bound together with a comforting hug
selflessness, lesser confidence, and a uncertainty
have been cured by a gentle, caring heart
as they crave a life of simplicity!
Their bond together is very clear
that their connection is precious and passionate
that nothing can delay the lucidity of their situation
And they know how nothing can go wrong!
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
Like I said and at least hope that it wasn't seen as a guilt trip or anything because that isn't my intentions. As a cancer I go off pure emotions, her as a Cap, hides them from everyone, even though she is a wreck inside. She tends to think more logic than from the heart. I know deep down in my gut ( And I'm usually right about it) she's hurting as well. Even logic states that you just can't turn off love. So I know the feelings are there, or were there, regardless the ball is in her court now however, her being a Cap, I should of left a passive question
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
it should be her yes however, my actions during the breakup is my fault. I stood up for her when she didn't want to stand up for herself, at 22 and mommy still won't let her get her drivers license says she is controlling and makes Sonya pretty much stuck. at least by apologizing for what I did is a step forward. After all it does take 2 to make a relationship. I hope this was passive and left it open, here is what I sent:
Sonya
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about you and how things are between us. I just want to let you know that I am sorry for the way I acted. I was a jerk and was not thinking with a clear head. Before I met you, I never felt love like this, never been so vulnerable yet, comfortable with someone. I was devastated when I lost you and acted very irrational and foolish. Trying to move on from you is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I hope you know how much you mean to me. I hope someday you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Again I am sorry for everything and hope you are having a wonderful day
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
I was going through some of my old messages the other day and came across a poem she wrote for me so I sent her a message the other day and kept it very passive and open ended. I apologized and explained my behavior on how I wasn't clear headed when we broke up. That I came off as a jerk and acted irrational and foolish because, losing her was the hardest thing I've had to go through. I told her that she was the first woman (which she is) that I have ever really opened to completely with my heart and stated that I hope she could forgive me someday.
I didn't ask for anything in return and I know I probably won't get a response, that is for her to decide. I sent this out to her on Saturday in an email because I know she has it set to automatically go to her phone. At least now the ball is in her court and hopefully she read it and didn't take it as a guilt trip but, rather a understanding of how I feel and acted. I hope she reads it and takes it into consideration and understands my sincerity.
I know I must move on. It's hard and I still think about her every second of everyday. Not so much in a painful way but more of a pondering way. I feel so lost without her and probably should of asked a few questions. I didn't because I didn't want her to feel pressured into having to answer anything.
I'm sure she still thinks about me a lot and probably still cares. She wouldn't be human if she didn't. I just hope that she will respond but, I am not expecting it.
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
Pfree
Thanks for the advice and I will always keep my heart open however, Helping others at this point is something I can't do because, at the moment I can't even help myself.
VoplySoply
thank you so much for listening to me, you words are truthful and kind
It's been over 2 weeks now since I last spoke with her, I have a lot of things on my mind that I would like to approach her about but don't know if I should or how to if I did
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
The last thing from my mind at this point is getting involved with someone else. I won't let that happen. The only thing I want is her at this point but, that doesn't seem likely either
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RE: I've never felt this much pain
And painful it is, I don't know what to do at this point.