Hehehe. Never mind. She answered a couple questions for me today.
She didn't know she was...
This is gonna be fun.
I had a dream a while ago that I'm still trying to figure out. It seems prophetic.
In this dream, I was living in an apartment complex and there was a fire. I left my apartment for a moment and in the halls was a riot of people running scared.
I went back in and got all my guns (irl I don't own a gun) and put them in a box to take with me and hide. Not because they were illegal and I was afraid of the authorities, but because I was worried stupid people would take them and use them against others.
I took my box and hurried through the halls until I came to a door. I went through to an adjacent building that was deserted, and had been for a while. There was a thick layer of dust covering everything. There was still smoke in the air, but it was calm, the fire hadn't reached that building. I was safe there. I hid my box of guns and as I was walking down some stairs, I noticed three names written in the dust on the rail, as though written with a finger. I can't for the life of me remember what the names were.
In the next 'scene', I found myself being carried up into the sky on a column of smoke from the fire. Other columns were also rising up to a single angry black cloud with a bright light coming from within.
A voice spoke to me:
Three blended souls.
Three seeds for planting:
Faith and Commitment
Honesty and Courage
Loyalty and Honor
Three Choices to make.
I married an evil woman years ago. During the time we were together, I learned of a number that had followed her for years, and saw that it did indeed stand out far more often than other numbers. 154. The only problem is, we've been separated for 4 years (divorce is close) and living in completely different states and this number is following me. I see this number very nearly daily. License plates, signs, clocks, everywhere.
What is the significance of 154, and will it stop following me when the divorce is final? Probably not. I'm not sure numbers pay much mind to signatures on paper.
I'm a Pisces (2/22/75), Cap rising, and a Moon in Cancer. I have a friend I met a work who is a Scorpio (11/21/79).
The day we first met, I had just started my job and was taking a break. She came in and plopped down beside me and started talking. I had a very intense urge to put my arm around this woman and pull her closer to me. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. Like I had done it a thousand times before. The words coming out of her mouth must not have been very important, because I still have no idea what she said.
Two years later, I'm helping her in her department with the heavy lifting because she can't get her help to do any work. If I remember correctly, she asked for my help once, and somehow it's become a part of my daily routine. Go figure. You can't tell me Scorp's aren't sneaky.
I don't mind, though. She's also managed to get me to fall in love with her, and we're 'just friends'. Of course, it doesn't take a lot to get my heart, just to keep it.
I have to say, this relationship is very extremely frustrating. Simply because of the fact that we can't talk to each other. Not about anything personal. For my part, I know that this thing is very intense, and to speak of it might unleash something that well has the potential to destroy us both.
She knows how I feel. In depth. Ten pages of every single thought I've had about her, every feeling I have. I write well. And probably too much. But these feelings I have are so intense that if I try to communicate by speech, she's going to wonder what the hell Gilligan's Island has to do with anything. So I wrote. And now she knows, and she knows I'm not into casual sex. I won't sleep with her unless it means something. And yet she hasn't spoken of it. Neither has she run away.
I'm fairly certain that most of the things I do for her weren't my idea to begin with, but like I said, I don't mind. I'm more of an 'actions speak louder than words' kinda guy, and I'm all about proving myself. I also have the tenacity to keep pushing forward, even though I don't really get to spend a lot of personal time with her to really move this thing forward. She likes to segregate her life and keep her friends in separate compartments. She likes her secrets.
Question is, should I keep pushing forward? I've put two years into this thing. It seems to be creeping forward, but creeping is all it's doing. I don't ask her for anything. I don't want to drag anything out of her that she isn't willing to give. I don't want to take her secrets, I want her to give them. Is it a trust thing, or do I just not belong here? Is she waiting for something? And what the hell am I supposed to get her for her birthday? It's only two weeks out.