Posts made by Shinobi2

He knows I wasn't planning on going anywhere, I give him his space, he gives me mine. I wonder if all this is because he isn't too sure how I really feel. I have never said that I love him. That would be like pulling teeth for me especially as he says he doesn't love me. It has kept me from being completely free with him, I am doing the same as him I guess, not saying how I truly feel. We talk at length about pretty much anything except about what really matters, I have been willing to try, but it feels like it's a one way street. I am prepared to try again to talk things through with him and see what happens from there. I would be interested to hear what happened in your relationship with scorpio man.

Thanks for your insight. I guess I do know what I need to do. You are right on both counts, my father was controlling and I am tired of carrying all the load and long for a man who can sometimes just say I'll take care of things once in a while. Right now I feel sad that yet again I've found myself in this sort of relationship and wonder if I'll ever meet Mr right. So tired of being alone or with the wrong man. I have spent one yr with this man after not having a relationship for almost 10 yrs throwing myself into work and looking after my sons. I felt ready for a new relationship and felt so sure this one would be right for me. Sorry, I'm feeling rather sorry for myself right now, but I know I will bounce back, I always do. Many thanks for your help.

Thanks Shuabby. I get so confused with him at times. Now he is saying he doesn't want me to be in any relationship with anyone else, questions me about where I've been etc. Yet he hasn't fully committed himself by saying we are in an exclusive relationship. I want to just walk away, yet I am so drawn to this man. My previous relationships had control issues and it feels like similar issues rearing it's ugly head again. I wish I knew why I am drawn to men who want to have control. Is there something wrong with me? Do you think there is any possibility that this could even work if we both tried harder?

I'm a scorpio woman and have been seeing taurus man for the past year. Things have been a bit up and down recently and we have agreed to be just friends. We are still close and I care about hin very much and accept that things are as they are. He however keeps going on about how he doesn't love me but thinks I am a fantastic friend and doesn't want to lose our friendship. He believes we will be in each other's lives for good. He still cooks for me, tells his friends how fantastic I am. Recently his mum was asking him how I was, he explained the situation and apparently she asked how do I really feel about thing? Now I am not sure if he's really the one asking? I admit I'm not big on opening up and I probably know lots more about him than he does me. To be honest, why should I bare my soul when he has told me he doesn't love me? I admit I have deep feelings for him but my pride keeps me from confessing this to him. I asked him how he would feel if I went out with someone else and he said he was fine with that and even went as far as saying he would vet any of my potential boyfriends to see if they were suitable for me!

As it happens I told him I was asked out on a date and that I was going. He seemed ok about it. On the night in question, he called me in the evening while I was out and asked me to call round at 11pm that same night. I told him I was out and couldn't do that. He said ok and hung up abruptly. He was in a bad mood all that day so his friends tell me. I called him the following day and we argued over what I don't really know!

The day after that I called him again and he was much calmer. He called round and he apologised for his behaviour. Not once did he mention my date, it was as though it never happened. As a friend I would have thought he would have asked me how it went considering he was all for me to get on with my life. I have not mentioned it either. What's going on? Does he care more than he is letting on or is he just not that interested and should I just move on? Would love some advice on this.

Yes he has hurt me, and I do think there is a control issue going on. I ask myself why do I always end up in relationships where this happens? What is going on with me? I guess I do know the answer and I so much wanted this to work. It's been a long time since I've been in a relationship, locked myself off to men. Now I've come out of hiding I'm back in a similar position. I thought I had learned enough about myself not to be here again but obviously not. We are planning to go away abroad in 6 month's time on holiday, to see his family, it's already booked. I have suggested we remain as friends but he is not hearing this at all. Now he is talking about moving in together and getting married. Right now I feel I could just give up on the whole thing, not sure if we can ride this. I am trying to be more open with him about how I really feel and it's so difficult.for me. I don't want it to get to the stage where I completely lose myself and let rip, I feel a big fight coming on. Maybe I should just end this before it get's worse but I find it so hard to let go really.

It's ok earthgirl. Honestly I think men really are from mars, especially taurus men lol. I know what you mean about your man being friends with his ex's, so is mine. He also talks loud when he's ready, stubborn and makes it known he's wearing the trousers. He can be really harsh and yet so loving and giving.

I am a bit wary of the control thing. He makes out that he likes independent, strong women, but seems uneasy when I'm doing my thing. He expects me to be there at all times when he wants me to be there. Should he decide he needs his space, he needs it and doesn't want me around. I've made it clear that I'm not at his beck and call. It's also true that when I withdraw from him that's when he turns on the charm and tells me he's not letting me go, and doesn't want me to be with anyone else. He is so selfish at times. I struggle to understand what's going on. He reckons we understand each other as we face each other from a zodiac point of view. I try to convince myself that it can work, and that its just that he is challenging.

Yet I don't want to be wasting my time on someone who doesn't actually care for me. I'm pretty sure he's not seeing anyone else at the moment. He's not working just now and I know he's down about that. He spends a lot of time on his own thinking and contemplating. It's hard to get him out of the rut he's in right now. Part of me thinks this isn't going to work and that I should get out now. Another part is asking me am I going to throw in the towel at the first sign of trouble? I guess the question for me is do I stay and fight for what I want or just move on?

What I meant is that it is so difficult to get him to consider another point of view other than his own, it's either his way or no way. I find him selfish at times and it's so frustrating. He tells me stuff that he says he's never told anyone before, and that he's found it difficult to let people get close. I'm not sure if he's afraid or whether it is just that he's trying to use me.

I am trying to be as open as I can be with him. I'm kind of on guard myself as I don't want to be hurt by him. I have to say I see him most days, he calls often, though calls are short and sweet lol.

He's always willing to cook and occasionally buys me gifts. But to be honest, i sometimes despair of him. I know that he has had some really difficult situations in his life, he's so stubborn and difficult at times. Also getting him out of the house and doing things for me is a big deal. He likes it when he gets the visitors but shifting him out of his comfort zone is tough. I asked him to spend some time with me and my family at christmas. He declined initially and asked me to take his gift that he bought for my mother! I refused point blank to take the gift and told him he needed to take it round himself, and that I would be angry if he didn't show. He did show although he called me to pick him up! He spent a good couple of hours with my family before he felt he needed to go. I was glad he came and feel this is some progress.

I know he talks about me with his friends, but sometimes I just don't know where I stand. He likes to take his time. He is adamant he wants me in his life, and that he feels we are like soulmates, yet sometimes he is so cold. I am just about getting used to his bluntness.

What's going on for him?

His name is wayne. I have suggested we just remain friends. We had planned to go on holiday together next year and he still wants to do that. I am feeling uncomfortable as I just don't really know where I stand. He says one thing, such as we are very good friends then calls me his girl and tells his friends I'm his girl. he says he loves me loads and I have to assume it's as friends only. But in the next breath he says he just can't let me go. Very confusing. What to do?

Been seeing my taurus man for 4 months now, I know he is interested, he cooks, buys me gifts etc etc, but I get confused at times as to what's going on for him. I know he has been hurt in the past and perhaps he is being cautious. For example he says he doesn't want to let me go, then in the next breath he's saying let's see how things go. yet he has introduced me to his brother and sister. He tells me stuff about himself that he has never told anyone else. He wants me to understand him, but I think it works both ways, he needs to understand me too.

I withdraw because I don't want to crowd him, then he tells me everything is alright and he want's me to be around. I find it difficult to completely let go when we are intimate as part of me fears his rejection, then he tells me I am not doing the things he likes to turn him on. This in turn puts me off. I want to please him but I feel I am not a performing seal! I am trying my best to be more communicative as I want this relationship to work and am going with the flow. He says he wants it to work too.

I am wondering whether I am setting myself up for heartache? I am so confused. I just need things to be clear and then I can deal with anything. Can anyone help?

Thank you all for the insights, I guess I will need to be more patient with him. Sometimes it feels like I'm being interviewed for the job of wife! lol. He did say yesterday though that he wasn't going anywhere and he did want us to be more than good friends with benefits. I will just go with the flow. He is wonderful, never met anybody quite like him. He has his moments and I am amused at how miserable he can be until he's fed! He is not phased by my me in the slightest.( I have found in the past that some men are put off by my intensity- so I have been told) He has totally blown me away, I pray I have found my soulmate at long last.

Been seeing taurus man for 6 months. He is a blast from the past. We met up 10 yrs ago, but nothing came of the friendship then. Now we are very close, but he seems slow to commit. He says he needs time to see if I am the right person for him, yet he cooks for me, takes me out, calls me most of the time, talks about the future with me included, so on and so forth. I'm a little confused as I care for him very much but I don't want to be hurt yet again. He has been hurt in the past too and I wonder if he is still in love with that particular woman and can he really move on? Am I wasting my time?

I'm actually 45 he's 48. I know we are getting on a bit and that's probably why he's so keen to get together with me probably. He says he's not had a relationship for two years not because he couldn't but because he was tired of casual meaningless relationships and just wants to settle down. We haven't really argued as it probably is still early days yet. But I did notice that even though I told him I would just want to go with the flow, no pressure he would agree then in the next breath he would be telling me i could stay over at his place as we are grown people-what's the problem? So that's how he's looking at things. He says he has so much that he wants to give to the right woman and he thinks I am that woman. I kind of feel that it's all a bit too soon to be talking in those terms. His attitude is what are we waiting for?

I don't know too much about his background just yet. I know he has been living abroad for a number of years and has only been back in the country 3 years as his mum is not well. From a spiritual point of view he seems to know himself.

It's just so hard to tell. One thing he did say that did impress me was that he didn't need me to look after him- he was meaning from a financial and emotional perspective. I found this interesting as my typical relationships in the past has mainly been me carrying the men in my life, they have mainly been weak in character and I was always helping them out financially.

I never mentioned any of this but he seemed to pick up on something and said he could look after himself and that perhaps it was time someone helped me. It could just be freetalk I guess, but you are right, how do I know if he is genuine?.

Hello Kn7

Thanks for your prompt response. I agree with you, I will take things very slowly. I did say we could be friends and he agreed but I do wonder whether that would be possible given that he would be looking for something more.I don't want to make any more mistakes. He likes to organise and already I have had to put my foot down. I suspect he is quite dominant and that would bother me as I don't want to be dominated. Yet I don't want to pre judge or miss an opportunity for a good relationship. Maybe I am attracting the same kind of controlling men but he is just coming in different packaging? What do you think?

I haven't been in a relationship for a few years now, the last one was particularly messy and I kind of locked myself down. Now out of the blue, an old aquaintance has just popped up in my life. He is a Taurean and he has made it clear that he wants to be more than just friends. He said he feels a connection on a spiritual level and that he is ready to settle down. I don't necessarily feel a strong physical attraction, but I do love his attributes. I know if I was in a relationship with him he would treat me like a queen. I'm normally attracted to the dangerous bad boy type and always end up in misery. My friends tell me to be open and to dismiss him just because he is not the usual type I go for. I admit I am intrigued as he said stuff about me, like he was reading me and I found that a bit unnerving as it's usually the other way round.

The question is would he be a good match for a scorpio girl like me? I also long to meet the right person and settle down but just not sure if he would be the one. Am I being too deep or should I just enjoy the moment? Help would be appreciated.

birthdate 7th Nov 1962

Hi feel as though I've come to a crossroad in my life both in terms of career and love life. In fact it's been a long time since I have been in a serious relationship and now I feel ready to have someone in my life again. Can anyone help please?

Thank you for this, I believe you are correct in your assessment. This has been bothering me for a long time. I don't really understand why I may be deceiving myself or why I give away my power in this way. Or maybe I do. I have been in some really dysfunctional relationships in the past and probably this has something to do with it in terms of my own self esteem and the kind of men I attract and who are attracted to me. It's not what I wanted to hear but truth sometimes is hard. Thank you for being so frank- I appreciate it

I did request him as friend on facebook, but he ignored that request too. I have kind of withdrawn from him because of his behaviour so when we are in social situations I no longer speak as I don't know how to handle this. He does have this presence about him which is extremely sexy and want him like crazy

There was contact, and as far as I was concerned we were friends although there was definitely strong energy between us. I was home pretty much most weekends in the beginning, and yet he still behaved that way. We were just getting to know each other. The problem I am having is that I just cannot get him out of my head and I have this odd feeling that he is aware of it and he's playing with me