Dear Soapmaker,
Hi. I have spent quite some time reading your posts and feel your special caring, love and intelligence. Bless you a hundredfold!!
I was wondering whether you could peek a little into my future. I am a older female seven years close to retirement age, who has been having health issues, recently diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I have been unemployed for quite a while, I can't seem to find a job in the field I previously worked (for 22 years) since my skills have become outdated. I have been trying to eat away at a degree, but that is going slowly because of the cost of tuition. I have been married to the same man for twenty-four years and have two children. This illness seems to have taken over my life, and has affected everyone and everything. The specialist seems to be trying to control the pain, treat the symptoms not find the cause. I'm concerned about how this is going to unfold - will I be able to control the pain, will I/we ever find the cause, will I ever find a job, should I continue with college (is it worth it) or should I try a trade school, is this affecting my marriage, etc. (My marriage has been rocky for the past five years or so, and I am still wondering whether he has been unfaithful.) To add to the frustrations, I have a son who is living at home. After five years of college he finally found a job. His car engine blew, so he's using my car for work. My daughter is living on her own, working full time. She was recently in an accident, was injured, and her car is considered to be totaled. We're working through a lawyer to clear her of a erroneous ticket. My husband is working for a company that was bought out, and they are going through the usual trimming of employees, costs and restructuring. He's concerned about his job security. So there is a lot of stress, stress and more stress, and much worrying. Some days I feel like a prisoner, with pain and circumstances as my warden. I would appreciate any reflections or advice you could offer.
Thank you.