Jenever7 - ok here is the latest update
Last night he let me know he simply does not want to date at all, anyone. That he does not want any kind of a relationship for a while, he said until his divorce is over, which will be in February/March of next year. He simply said he realizes after all of our conversations and some things I've pointed out to him in wrintings etc,,, and sending him his horoscopes every now and then, have really made him self reflect and think and he just needs to be alone and figure himself out. Which I completely respect.
He also said that me telling him that I wasn't going to date made him think too and he didn't want to hold me back from moving forward in my life when he knows he simply isn't wanting to let anyone in. That he isn't emotionally ready to do that and he didn't want to be unfair to me
He apologized a few times for being so indecisive and for changing his mind and said it is not normally like him, but he is churning inside and I have known this. We got into a deep discussion about his soon to be ex-wife and that relationship and I learned a lot more. He has healing to do, he is still tied to that relationship. He might not have romantic feelings for her, but he is still tied there and it bothers him that the marriage didn't work. He has his financials to work through to become more stable and from what I understand of Cancers - when you start layering all of this stuff up - what he is doing is exactly what they do.
He asked me if I would still be friends with him, hang out every once in a while and talk every few days on the phone (his words). Of course, I said yes and told him, because it is true, that I compeltely understand. He JUST moved out of his house with his soon to be ex wife in February - that is NO WHERE near enough time for him to be ready for anything. I actually respect that he was able to go through the processing and come to his current position and decisions.
I did ask him what kind of ffriend he wanted to be, because with my close male friends, I go to them for advice about other guys. He said he was not ready for that yet and that might take some time for him.
I am happy with where we are right now, because I was starting to feel like I was giving and bending to accomodate him and where he was at and I don't want to be in a relationship like that, neither does he.