Night Owl I like your advice alot of wisdom in what you say. Thanks. i can only speak for me not rainy rain when I say that I think breaking up with him is inevitable its just a matter of when. I tried another failed attempt to break it off and was manipulated back into the relationship when I was told there was only a small handful of times I would have to see him before he would leave and go south for the winter. He also said he wanted me and the kids to have a nice christmas and he wanted to be a part of that. He definantly uses money to get what he wants and after raising 3 kids on my own and all the struggles we have been through its really hard to turn it down and accept his gifts, money , and even his kindness. I really like your perspective though thanks for your words. ( :