I really can identify with your words. Especially this waste of time feeling. I am fortunate I am an artist so I put a lot of my energy into this however the heart needs love so a hobby cannot do everything. I am glad to hear you have a child out of all of this. Though it is hard to deal with this child I feel. There is a good and bad to everything I suppose.
You know I read a really good book by Robert Moss called Unconscious Dreaming and he spoke about a woman's dream in which she was a child and had nightmare of a woman on a park bench with no nose. The woman creeped her out. The dreams haunted her for years. She meets a man and get married to him the mother and he both had a genetic problem with their noses. The mother had a nose job but the husband had to have one completely rebuilt from plastic it was false and the woman had no idea until after she knew him awhile. So the mother in law hated her and was unnaturally close to the son and turned him against her . They ended up destroying her emotionally to where she wished she had never met this man she had to quit her job divorce and move across the country. SHe realized the dream was a melding of the two people together .
You and I have had similar dreams.
ANd you are smart like me shutting off and changing the future events Moss write about this in his books. I went to one of his events hoping he could help me. Instead he told me ( he is supposed to be psychic) that someone I know put a curse on me.
Now I am a practical person I don't really go for a lot of this metaphysical stuff. I mean you sound like me if you have these abilities you really don't want them a lot of times they can piss you off...
It is like LET ME LIVE MY LIFE --STOPE TELLING ME THE END. Or tell me the end but tell me when it is happening not like so many years in advance I don't need to obsess on it.
BUt anyway he just looked sad at me and said "Hope you feel better" like I was a nutjob " and walked away.
Sometimes my abilities makes me see to deep into people however and I see thru their layers and how they use stuff meant to help people to make money and I am not down for this at all.
On the subject of this friend of yours you are correct on this weird vibe I get it as well. I get a thin tall and dark with pale skin feeling from him he is a loner and quiet ( is this him?) He has a lot of emotional adjustment issues and I get like the feeling of a mirror thrown down and shattered like he is a reflection of many different things inside. This may indicate a personality issue problem which might be very confusing for you.
With your ability you probably have a healing vibe and people will be attracted to you that are well...hmmm broken so well I don't need to tell you this you know and you know what to do you are very smart.
Do you live in the country I see gardening you love. I feel this restores you like nothing else...
The energy chord with the ex is strong. I find if you look at it as what you needed at the time to get into that relationship and what is different for you now this helps release the bonds.
I feel him as a thicker stockier man with brown hair kind thinning and very aggressive he feels like a bull I feel steam out his nostrils.
I hope to hear from you again