I've had my heart smashed in some many pieces, so many times, by the same man. I know how very stupid I am. For so long, I felt and believed I wasn't good enough for him. That I was doing something or everything wrong (my hair,my makeup,my clothing,nails etc). One day after praying so much, god told me, "He's not good enough for you." I believe that, I realize that. All the things he put me through. All the things he stole from me. All the games he played and lies he told and continue to tell. All the dreams he killed. Why want he leave me alone? Because of him I feel, i never want to see another man as long as i live. When I have to talk to a man,I never look at them,never stop my motion. Never take them serious and bite their heads off. I make alot of my co-workers anry. They ask me something work related, and i tell them to ask someone else. Never looking at them or stop walking. Half of me says, forget the past, forget yesterday and him and bloom. The other half of me says, their not worth the heartache. The center of me says. (WHEN YOU TRY TO HOLD TOGETHER SOMETHING,GOD HIMSELF DOESN'T WANT,IT WILL NEVER BE. NOONE CONTROLS GOD. ALSO, WHEN SOMEONE SHOWS YOU, WHO THEY ARE, BELIEVE THEM. DON'T LIVE FOR YESTERDAY OR TOMORROW. LIVE FOR TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME. I FEEL SO LONELY,LOST,CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!