I stumbled upon this forum and I couldn't be more thankful I did! I have been in quite the dysfunctional "situation" with a cancer man for just shy of a year now. I consider myself a strong, knowledagable person but this is one situation that has taken my mind for a constant spin. When I met my Cancer, I was still emoationally broken from a pervious relationship and in noooo desire to put my guard down. When I finally gave him my number, he was the most persistant guy I probably had ever met. Texing my every day, every morning, uber dedicated and quite the "charmer" - He had been in a 6 year relationship and "madly in love' but was cheated on. It ended about 5 years ago but he was quick to mention this to me. Thankful for his honestly, but cautious why he would put something out there from day one when we are JUST starting to get to know each other. He said he wishes her well but he has moved on with his life (I question this). Long story short, at the beginning the only way I can descirbe my Cancer man would be AMAZING! We would spend hours on the phone nightly, I would get the most thoughtful texts, ridicuously charming and he made a huge effort to come see me etc. It's only natural that I started to really like him. I never had to question if he liked me. One thing that stands out is I asked him if he was looking for a relationship, he said he couldn't answer that because he didn't know. He didn't want to fill my head with ideas if there was no guarentees. Only time will tell. Respectable. I was the happiest I had been in a long time, but cautious. Then BOOM, just like that everything changed. I remember the day it happened. everything changed the moment I became vulnerable to him. Since that day, I have been in most vicious cycle of confusion. He kept me close enough so I would countinue to hold on but far enough away to keep me wondering. All of a sudden he became this mystery, and often a major contradition. He told me he wasn't ready for a relationship and that it's about a process of getting to know someone. The more I pushed and questioned him, the farther he would distance himself. He never showed emoation nor was he ever detailed about his feelings/view of me. He said he liked me but with a Cancer man, does that mean as a friend, as an interest, etc? I had no idea. I did not for the life of me understand. Most of my days I spent in a daze because I was so affected by this whole situation. It has taken such a toll on me emoationally, physically etc. I am an Aries so by nature I am the fire sign. Now for 9 months I have been in the same vicious cycle I have been since 7 months ago. I have tried to walk away NUMERIOUS times and he has even agreed it would be best, but he never lets me go. It's almost like a rubber band, the moment I stretch too far .. he snaps me back in. The fact of the matter is nothing ever changes. I've read up on his sign and he is a Cancer to a "T" - but here's the thing ... All us women are trying to make sense of situations that really don't make much sense. Looking every which way for answers to explain WHY things have changed and WHY our "cancer men" are acting in such odd ways. Here is something I have come up with and I can only hope it helps all of you out there who have been or are going through what I have spent 9 months of my life going through ... WHEN A MAN LIKES A WOMEN, A MAN LIKES A WOMEN! I don' t care what your sign is or what has happened in your past. I believe every situation is different but we should NEVER question how a man feels about us. It shouldn't even be an "I THINK" - it should be an "I KNOW" . It is not our problem what they are going through inside. After a week of not responding to my Cancers texts and messages he sent me a mile long text saying that he's use to people coming and going from his life. It's "the norm" - He played victim. The fact is, if he didn't want me to leave he wouldn't be putting me through such turmoil. Don't be a Cancer Man or any mans option. Know what you are worth, don't use his sign as justification for his actions. If you do this, you are ALLOWING him to treat you this way. I do not wish upon ANYONE to go through what I have been going through all this time. I have nothing to show for it but surfice words and memories. I don't want to live in the past, or what he HAS done but focus on how I feel now and if I'm getting the treatement I rightfully deserve. I love him, no question. I have put up with this shyt and have allowed for this treatment to continue. Everything is on his time, what he wants, when he wants it, pure selfishness. If a man does not recognize what he has and is not treating you how you want, let it burn. It's going to hurt, you are going to cry but in the end you are BETTER OFF! Don't be an option, don't be his "sometimes" girl, be his all or nothing ~ unless you are okay with the minipulation, wishy-washyness, uncertinity, and confusion......
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RE: PLEASE HELP! Is my cancer man not interested anymore??