I'm new to this forum so Hello everybody. Your replies to others seem to have some bearing so I hope you can help me out here too. I'm sitting here alone at the computer because my love of my life has made yet another tactless crude comment towards me and I took offense to it - Now he's sulking and avoiding any contact with me.
I'm Libra and he's a Taurean male. We're in our 50's and been in a relationship for 7 years. At first our relationship sparked. Everything was perfect so to speak. Lost my job 3 years ago due to outsourcing and since then I feel like our relationship has plummeted southward. His behavior is nothing like when we first met. He has a dry sarcastic sense of humor (which I like) but since losing the job, he's turned this humor on me. He complains about everything, insults me, makes crude innuendos when he wants me (certainly not the romantic man I fell in love with). He treats me like I'm his wh***. I hate head games but he likes to play head games and I was never the target until I lost my job. Conversing with him has become a chore. I refuse to provide him with any info about my past when he asks, because all he wants to do is use it and throw it up in my face and tease me. If I try to have any other conversation with him he's like Sheldon on Big Bang Theory, cuts me off and says the conversation doesn't interest him. When I try to talk to him about his behavior and how it hurts me, he cops an attitude and sulks big time. I know he loves me ( I see signs here and there) but I don't feel loved any more and it's getting harder to love him back.
History:
His ex-wife hurt him terribly. She just took the kids and up and left him - no warning. so now he's avoiding any serious commitment. At one time I was interested in marrying him but not anymore. His kids are pushing marriage and I wish they would just leave it alone. It's definitely not helping the situation. From the stories he's told me about her, He says he's not, but I feel like he's trying to mold me into their relationship that they had.
He used to take equal responsibility - now he takes no responsibility. He blames me for everything. I even feel now like everything wrong in our relationship is my fault. I have no self esteem anymore and I don't feel attractive thanks to his comments. Forget any kind word from him, it's like pulling teeth. I haven't been able to find a job and now the change in him is making the my depression worse. "Happy" pills don't even work.. Although I'm in a good mood until he comes home. He makes one thoughtless comment "trying to be funny and cute" and all I want to do is slap him. It sets me off and go to arguing with him. I try hard not to nag him but I'm human and I know it's not helping so I try not to.
He claims I don't love him and I can understand why he feels that way. His behavior is pushing me away emotionally and physically and I try not to show it but it's hard. I know he's going through some kind of thing cause he sleeps all the time and claims he has narcolepsy. He won't go to a doctor.
I do love him and I want to save our relationship but I'm stymied. Can one of you Taureans tell me what could possible be going on? Thanks.