Really terrific help guys, I really appreciate your input!

CC - Firstly, I am so sorry you were so sick back in 2004. Thanks so much for your guidance as you definitely have the insight from experience. My Cancer guy is currently undergoing a battery of tests. He has severe abdominal pain, numbness in his legs, constipation, nausea, extreme fatigue coupled with insomnia (we've had many phone conversations that literally lasted as long as 11+ hours over night!) - Celiac is genetic and his uncle has a couple of the same symptoms yet the disease does not always affect all family members. He's going to be hospitalized soon for a lower GI biopsy. I really believe we're going to get a handle on this thing in the next 30 days.

2knowme... - you're right and I KNOW you're right. I don't give up my heart easily and it is very tied to my Cancer guy. The dating site thing . . . am actually going on a date today and will be given the tour of the Pensacola beaches (I'm from LA - that's Lower Alabama) which is only about 40 miles from me so just gonna have some fun.

Cappy - I will most definitely go to Facebook (never have) and will find you there as I definitely want to know what it is that you're referring to other than the pendulum thing. Again, say this as many times throughout the day . . . "IF IT IS IN THE HIGHEST AND BEST INTEREST OF ALL THOSE CONCERNED, I NOW WELCOME INTO MY LIFE, MY HEART, AND MY SOUL MY NEW PERFECT PARTNER - THANK YOU GOD!"

To all - that above prayer is POWERFUL so if you're totally fed up with your guy, give it up to God and "The Universe" as who knows?!?!

2knowme - Terrific Advice and your words have motivated me to send him a very caring email letting him know again that I'm truly not going anywhere - Thank You So Much!!

Hey CC, thanks so much and no you were not too harsh!

Yes, I do really love this guy unbelievable as it sounds since we only recently met. Lightning has definitely struck both of us, really. I truly understand and can certainly appreciate how tough it is for him right now . . . that's why I tried to tell him that I had no intention of going anywhere. I can be the Rock of Gibraltar when it comes to strength (most times anyway!)

Here's what I did and I feel really good about it actually AND just received a nice response from him. I responded after roughly 16 hours and emailed him thanking for entertaining my Celiac Disease possibility as well as opening up communication letting me know how he was actually doing. Regarding his comment about me deserving someone better and "hoping that God will bless him with such a wonderful woman like me" when he gets better . . . I simply said "He already has! I'm right in front of you!" I told him that I missed him and our conversations. He said that he missed me too and would let me know when he feels better.

He also commented on my pictures on match.com so he definitely knows that because of his pushing me away I've gone back on it. My heart's not really in it but . . .

Thanks again!

Hey everyone! Here's my latest in the saga regarding my Cancer guy's health issues AND the fact that he has completely ended all contact . . . until a few hours ago (I guess I'll learn!) Remember that I've never been in a "relationship" with a Cancer so this is new territory for me.

Brief synopsis; prayed for him, met him, we BOTH fell for eachother, he has been ill for over a year with no accurate diagnosis and thinks he's dying, because of this has broken off all contact with me as "I deserve someone better!"

Cappy got me hooked on the "pendulum thing" just this past week. I kept getting that my guy would contact me Saturday the 27th after having absolutely no contact since he broke all ties last Saturday the 21st. Guess what?! He emailed me early this morning Saturday the 27th at 1:38am. I was happy to hear that he is being tested for just about everything including Celiac Disease (which actually came to me in prayer which I passed on to him - at least I know that he actually read my email since he told me that "all of my further contact would be in vain!") I FEEL that he will have an accurate diagnosis by the end of July. In his email this morning he says that we should know what he has in the next 30 days. Sounds like we're on the same page anyway.

This is where I'd love your input. By the way; after having been "off" match.com for the past 6 weeks, which is when he contacted me, I just reactivated my profile last night. His profile is hidden but it's apparent that he has been checking to see my "status" on the site. Is it any wonder as to why he contacted me again? Is he now realizing that I am actually moving on (of course my heart is still stuck with him and will be for some time I'm afraid!) and that he's now really concerned?

His last words to me in this morning's email are "You deserve a healthy man with his life on track. You are a beautiful soul with so much to offer. I am so sorry I had so little to offer you. Maybe one day when I get better, get back on payroll and get my life together, God will bless me with such a wonderful woman like yourself. I have been praying for you inspite of my sickness and broken heart." I have been absolutely agonizing over how and IF I should even respond. Is this simply a ploy because he is so full of insecurity and is testing me or what?!?! I am so over-analytical and it's driving me crazy.

What do you guys think?! Thanks so much for the time and for the consideration!

Cappy2 (or should I say "Mom"!)

I am so very sorry for your disappointment but you sound like one tough cookie. (maybe a hard shell but a soft center perhaps?) You're doing the RIGHT thing by getting out there again. From reading all the posts on this forum I guess we won't be surprised at all if your Cancer guy comes waltzing back into your life. But then who knows . . . you could meet the absolute man of your dreams who won't mess with your head and has the emotional maturity and stability to deserve your warmth, kindness and love! Wouldn't that be wonderful.

Here is something that I can offer you as a daily affirmation . . . "If it is in the highest and best interest of all those concerned, I now welcome into my life, my heart, and my soul my NEW perfect partner; thank you God!" Ironically I started saying this prayer this past February and guess who shows up . . . on match.com no less; yup - my Cancer guy!!

Wishing you the very best and the warmest of thoughts!!

I've got to tell you, I'm really enjoying reading about everyone's scenarios . . . don't get me wrong; if you're having a bad time I really feel for you. I can only hope and pray for patience as reading about some of you having to wait 2 - 3 weeks is going to absolutely drive me nuts, I can see this already!! It does appear however, that a lot of you guys are having some terrific and very fulfilling experiences with your Cancer guy . . . so happy to hear this!

Cappy, I'm absolutely addicted to my pendulum now! It's truly amazing how it "reacts" to the different questions. At times it moves in a very gentle manner and other times; geez-oh-pete!

Bente- by the way, in my humble opinion Dior's Catwalk mascara is the very best. I used Lancome for almost 30 years until they dropped my favorite so I crossed over to Dior. It's a bit pricier than most but worth every cent!!

Hi Ladies!

Firstly, I want to thank all of you so very much for the time in reading about my "plight!" I would especially like to thank j3d, Tauren, CC and Cappy2 for your insight!

j3d - your comment about "messing with my head" with regards to why did he contact me on line intially is a terrific question actually. His affliction seriously worsened from the time of his arrival to this point in time. There is no question that he truly cares a great deal for me, he thinks that I'll be better off with someone else who is healthy. I can understand where his head's at quite honestly. His entire life has changed with his illness, giving up his 25 year career, relocating AND turning 50 all which has happened very recently. Even though we've had no contact since last Saturday I know that he saw an infectious disease doctor today and is seeing a neurologist tomorrow (at which point I sincerely hope he brings up Celiac Disease as I really think this is what he has.)

Check this out . . . of course we all believe in "the universe" and its "magic" (I definitely believe in God and pray A LOT quite frankly!) and its power otherwise we wouldn't be here, correct? I literally was praying for David (my Cancer guy) the other night and "heard" what I thought was "Feliac." Immediately following I went online and found "Celiac" - close enough! Just last night, after having NOT watched one of my favorite network shows "House" for the past four months. . . well guess what, I actually watched the episode; Celiac Disease was actually mentioned as a possible diagnosis - go figure! What do you think - a "Godwink" perhaps?!?

Tauren - boy can I relate to your comment about "moodiness!" Geez-oh-frickin'-pete!!

I thought I was moody at times; I'm a novice when it comes to my Cancer guy's mood swings! Must be the simple fact that Cancer is ruled by the moon; and we all know how that can affect us all!

CC- thank you for your words as you're right, I am following my intuition and will keep doing so.

Cappy2 - a special thank you to you!! TWO Cancer men?!? Wow! Regarding me writing emails to David letting him know that I'm still here I think is very wise. David's already very insecure due to his physical issues so if anything, warm words from me can only help him. My plan is to give it a bit more time with no contact as per his request. This decision by the way is based on what my pendulum said!!! - thank you for this! (I just need to apply my pendulum to my investments, just kidding!) According to my pendulum I won't be hearing from him until the end of this next week so we'll see. He should also be hearing something back from the most recent doctors' visits by the end of next week so there should be some "energy" by this time.

Again, thanks everyone! What a tremendous, insightful, and supportive group you all are. Trust me as I'm sitting back a bit reading all that you share but will most definitely throw my two cents in from time to time!

Hey there! Wow, I've just spent the last four+ hours reading this forum; truly insightful!!

I've got to tell you all that I have recently come into contact (very facetious way of putting this actually!) with a Cancer man. . . for the first time actually.

Let me share with you all just a bit about me and I would absolutely love to hear your feedback and any advice you can share with me. I am 50 years old and am an "old soul." People are shocked when I tell them my age as I can easily pass for 35 - 37. Genetics play a big part actually. In addition, I take care of myself physically and have taught aerobics for years. Please don't misunderstand me as I'm not at all arrogant or narcissistic in ANY way, believe me. I am very independent, strong-willed (Taurus - go figure!), have post graduate degrees and own my own company - I'm no dumby! I have always gotten a lot of attention from the opposite sex and usually intimidate most men, from what I'm told anyway. What I'm trying to tell you is that I've "been around the block a few times" and have a really good head on my shoulders - out of years of practice! I'm certainly not desperate nor am I lonely. Having said this . . . this Cancer man has absolutely "thrown me for a loop" and I truly do not know quite how to handle this guy.

This man contacted me on a dating site about six weeks ago telling me that he was relocating to my area. Our initial communications were via email and phone, with calls lasting up to 11+ hours no kidding! He is extremely articulate and very eloquent and can actually speak from his heart - truly amazing unlike most men! We had the amazing connection, unlike NEITHER of us had ever experienced . . . did I say that I've been around the block; yes I have! After ten days or so of talking daily for HOURS we made arrangements to actually meet in person. We were both like teenagers; the excitement and anticipation was incredible! We had fallen for eachother even before we had actually met. It's amazing as it's normally the physical chemistry that attracts us to one another intially. This was just the opposite which made our connection even more incredible in my opinion. I know myself . . . the physical attraction was and is very important to me and can/has at times "muddied the waters" if you know what I mean. When we actually came face to face, the magic was truly breathtakingly obvious - this is IT, this is the ONE! Movies are made and books are written about this! I knew that I knew that I knew and so did he. . . getting the picture?! Does any of this sound familiar?!? We had connected on not only a spiritual but an intellectual AND a physical level. We are so very much alike in so many ways; our beliefs, morals, ethics, etc. If I were a man I'd be him and if he were a woman he'd be me - we know this. He just turned 50 yesterday (this probably has someting to do with the issues!) and I turned 50 May 18th so we're not kids. We both are truly looking for the love of our lives and want to again be married some day. He has actually said that "when we're married . . ." and has all of these plans for us.

Here's where it gets interesting . . . we live about 55 miles apart. He has just relocated to the area and is literally "starting over." One of the reasons as to why he is now in the area is to be closer to his family. He has been very ill for the past year+. He has spent an enormous amount of $$ to try and determine his diagnosis with no success. He didn't want me to know this as he thought that I would not want to stick around so he withheld this from me initially. He actually told me that "I'm dying!" (are these guys hypochondriacs to a degree?!) I personally think that now that he's actually seeing the "right" doctors, his true diagnosis is right around the corner. (I believe he has Celiac Disease quite honestly after studying his symptoms and doing some online research. Over 3 million Americans have this but only 100K have actually been diagnosed - pretty interesting as it's a food allergy! Very severe as it can completely debilitate the afflicted individual!) He feels like he's a dead man walking and has basically ended this incredible connection that we have completely!! Why the heck did he even contact me if he truly thinks that he's dying?!?!? Because he loves me so much he feels that he cannot give me what I truly deserve. Doesn't matter that I have told him that I'm not going anywhere and that I would do absolutely everything and anything for him! We have only actually seen eachother a total of five times and immediately following our times together he pushes me away emotionally. He's so very insecure emotionally - I've never experienced this. This is becoming utterly exausting and yes it's only been five+ weeks so I cannot even imagine having to go through this as for the amount of time / years! that many of you have had to endure! Wow, God Bless You!

He can be fairly abrasive with his words to me, which I was actually taken back with and has said that he wants no more communication at all as "there is somebody better for me." He has also said that "I'm too intelligent and too classy of a woman to want to hang onto him - don't make a fool of myself!" and . . . "if I tried to contact him he would regret ever having met me!" Wow . . . such insecurity - is this how these guys behave AND if so how do I handle this type of behavior?!?! I have said that my heart is simply too fragile to deal with his emotions as he refuses to BELIEVE ME and BELIEVE IN ME when it comes to my feelings for him. He keeps pushing me away every time we get closer and I said at one point that if he keeps pushing me away, it's going to eventually WORK! He knows that I'm extremely independent and that I get a lot of attention from men and has mentioned this quite a bit. I have said that because of his so called lack of belief in how I feel for him there is no trust between us therefore we cannot have a truly loving relationship. Because of this I have in essence said goodbye and have wished him the very best BUT . . . my heart cannot let go (and intuitively feel that he'll be back again!)

Is this a Cancer pattern here?! Just shoot me or find me a tree and a rope (lol) as I don't know if I have the staying power for this, especially if this is going to happen time and time again!?There is absolutely no question that we have incredible feelings for eachother. I just recently met his sister whom he is very close to. He said that it was one of the most important days in his life as we would eventually be "family." I have yet to meet his parents but he has already spoken at length to them as well about me so his feelings are genuine.

I will NOT contact him even at my weakest moment (God help me!) BUT . . . should I? I know that he's going through some pretty tough stuff right now with his health as he has always been a very vibrant, energetic man and extremely successful man. Does he need to hear from me? As of now, I have sent him info regarding what I "think" his affliction is via email so that he can be tested for it. I have agreed to honor and respect the fact that he no longer wants any communication with me. I have only asked for him to share with me the diagnosis if and when he gets one as I truly care for him.

What do you guys think as I'm really new in dealing with a Cancer Man?!?!

Thank you all so very much for taking the time and I am so looking forward to hearing what you have to say!! With prayers and positive energy to you all!