Sorry. I've re-read my typing below and it's a long message. I really don't do "concise and to-the-point" well.
This does sound like astral travel, as others have said. I've only had that feeling once, the popping, the not being able to move, being able to see the room though I can feel my physical eyes are closed, and the sensation of my inner self being rocked loose of the sheath of my actual body, but sadly woke up in the process, so I've never had the whole start-to-finish experience I've read about and envied.
I believe I have travelled astrally many times, though usually only become aware of it while I'm in it. I've only been able to positively confirm one of the trips, though. It was to a ladies' restroom in Selfridges in a shopping mall in Milton Keynes, England, of all places! It really startled me to walk in for real two years ago on a visit to the UK and actually see this place I'd visited years before on the astral plane. Could hardly breathe or move with the recognition. Luckily it was England and everyone minded their own business, so I don't think they saw the stunned look on my face (or if they did, they pretended not to notice)!
If you're fearing the sensation, once you're in the flow of it, it's really hard to tell it from vivid dreams, which most of mine are. Personally I have never seen the cord, but then I've never looked for it. Maybe it really is there. As for the fear of loss of control, maintain a childlike innocence, trust, and sense of love and faith in whatever higher power you believe in (even if that higher power is simply "actual reality"). You won't be lead to anywhere you don't want to go or where you won't be safe, as long as you remain calm and curious. I am not overly-religious (spiritual, yes, but distrust organized religion), but do find the 23rd Psalm to always be a comfort to me ("The Lord is my Shepherd..."). You could also try to bring a chant or meditation to mind, or even your daughter's voice telling you everythings fine.
Also on the fear of loss of control, I used to get this often in my dreams, so I'm assuming the feeling you get with impending astral travel is the same (as mentioned, when I'm in it, I really can't tell that it's not just a vivid dream). That's reflective of one's fear of loss of control in actual life. This is why I encourage you to move beyond it. It's hard to let go. It's taken me years. Baby steps are fine. So, if you feel fear, stop in your tracks. Face the fear and try see it for what it is, and decide on fight-or-flight as you see fit, just as you do in real life, only on an astral trip, you have the added security of being able to snap back to your body and out of the danger in an instant. You do really have control, though, even if you are afraid. You know better than you think you do (and I can see this is true from the wise advice you give in this forum). Maybe put your "mum" hat on. Think of your daughter, as though you have her hand in yours, walking through a dangerous place. You know how to remain calm and alert to protect her. So try to do that for yourself.
Please try to trust the next time it happens. Astral trips (and vivid dreams for that matter) really can show you insights you might not otherwise be able to see. They could lead to truths that you might not want to know, but you will know deep inside if it is the truth. Clarity comes with the territory. It may also give you a crucial moment of peace, serenity and escape you need to calm your waking life amidst your current tragedies... even if all you do is visit a ladies' loo halfway across the world!
Wishing you strength and comfort in these troubling times.