I've recently started dating a Cancer male, and someone on this board said it best...
"The more secrets I find out about him the more I like him. He has so many interesting facets to his personality, I love it and it's like I have an insatiable appetite for more. I just hope he keeps telling me."
I know he has flaws, but I accept him the way he is. I've been married before. I have not seen any dealbreakers / red-flags to date.
I did, at first, stress over changes in his behavior as he went from a specific pattern of contacting me to being more available and then suddenly missing for days and even a week at a time. He, also likes to call for dates randomly, and on his terms. In general, I like the spontaneity, but I also have a few hangups around this I'll get to later.
I don't think that at any time I became the pursuer. I almost always let him call me first; I'll return calls, but have initiated them only a handful of times over the past 3 months. I've written him off at least 3 times in the 3 months that we've been dating. sigh
I did, however, initiate a call to him last night. And while he said he was glad I did, I'm still afraid it was a mistake - he kept apologizing for being so busy and being out of touch. I told him, repetitively, that I wasn't upset and I wasn't calling for any other reason than I was thinking of him and wanted to say hello.
I'm concerned that it was a bad move because I have been 'good' all along at giving him space, I think. Like I said, I almost never initiate a phone call or text message exchange. I have continued dating - up until about a month ago - other people because he hadn't asked me to see him exclusively.
However, the other thing I was concerned about was seeming "too" indifferent. I know his online profile at the dating site where we 'met' has been inactive for the past month. He definitely seems to be very sensitive. His uncharacteristic, week-long disappearence act came after a short increase in activity together and intimacy (at least, I thought).
And so that's ultimately my problem... I have become quite fond of this man, and while most men would seem to fit into the "seem indifferent and then they'll chase" category, I can't help but feel that this one needs some reassurance from time to time. And yet I also feel like he's testing me sometimes. And so I get confused...