I have been mourning the loss of my Sagittarius soul mate. I don't understand why he was brought to me and to be taken away a little over a year later. He was born 12/2/72 and passed away 12/11/13. We knew each for several years because we went to school together but never rally knew each other. We began talking to each other in 2011 after all these years. In September of 2012, I decided to give him a chance. I spent the night with him and I knew the next day that he was the one I had been looking for all these years. As we were discovering each other we both realized we watched the same movies over and over, interested in the same types of books, we could banter with each other and not get angry, we both thought quickly, we could laugh at each other and have fun, we both loved the same type of music, and discuss anything. As of a today, he has been gone for 9 months and it feels like he just left.

The day he passed away I woke up with a bad feeling. I feel guilty because I should have stayed home with him instead of going to work because the feeling. I was a little late coming home that evening and that is when I found him. I panicked but was able to call 911 but they were unable to bring him back. He died of a heart attack. The 11th of every month is just a bad day for me.

I know he is still with me in my heart but I do feel his presence from time to time. This may just be wishful thinking but I truly believe he is around. He has a daughter that he raised with the help of his mother. Any time she is having problems he lets me know either in my dreams or I will see signs that something is happening. With the dreams and signs I know I need to pay attention because something is about to be revealed to me.

I really don't know what to think about all of this other than I know I miss him a lot. I know there isn't a time limit on mourning. He and I did discuss how I would react in The event of his death. I believe we both knew and I know I did want to think about it. I did tell him I would keep moving and I am. It isn't easy. All the signs were there but I did not understand what was being shown to me.

I know I am rambling and I need to get this out. The signs I mentioned were knocking on the front door that I heard when I was a lone, he heard it by himself, and we both heard when we were together. I don't know if this makes any difference we are both Native American. His beliefs were more logical and I am more open-minded.

I really don't know what I am seeking right now. All I know his death really shook the foundation that I believed in and I am struggling to get back. I really don't know if I really will get back to that point. I was generally a happy person and when he came into my life I had never been so happy. It isn't the same any more and I want him back. It will never be the sMe again.

Sorry that is June 5th...thanks!

I'm curious my DOB: 6/5/1970 5:59am love and marriage. Thank you!

Thanks. I have been told that by a friend that I need to meditate to focus. I have stressful job and have gotten out of exercising to relieve the stress. You are probably right about yoga or needing to meditate because I am so restless. Had a little set back today about the Sag accusing me of not liking kids. I never said I didn't like kids other than that they stressed me out because I wasn't around them enough. I wanted kids but the men in my life already had kids and didn't want anymore. Additionally I wanted kids but was dealt a hand that I would have to have help to have them. Now I just feel I am getting to old now. It just depresses me that perhaps I am too independent for my own good that I have trouble compromising. I just don't know any more and don't know what I need to do to change. Perhaps I am being too hard on myself and the men that try to love me. I just don't know!......

So how do you limit your affections....I don't want to be cynical because there is so much to enjoy in this life. If you are saying don't give so much of myself to a person I know that isnt right for me then that is a practice I intend fully follow. Thanks

Thanks for the insight. I know I should trust my first instinct but think I am being to hard on men about what I want out of life. I just haven't found that right guy. I have lots of energy and true to my sign and often find that I tend to intimidate but want the men in my life to understand that I am capable of taking care of myself but at the same time want to be loved for me and all the quirks I have. I try to be as honest as I can because I want them to know what they are getting into but wonder if I just turn them off. I have one good friend that I can talk to but he has his own problems to deal with and sometimes I don't know who to turn too just to get things off my chest. Once I have talked the problems out with several people then I can move on. Sad to say it can be that easy for me but I have only one life and I don't want to miss out on things but feel I continue to do so.

Thanks again!

I need to elaborate with Sagittarius: He broke it off with me because he said we weren't getting along which was news to me. But should have known because we have been through this 3 other times with him moving out each time. This last time he had been talking to a girl online for 2 days but has known for 2yrs. I know who she is. He had asked me to marry him several times which I told him I didn't want to and did not know when I would be ready and would prefer just to live together which I though he was fine with that up until 3 weeks ago. Now they are getting married. I am angry and feel stupid though I still would not marry him. I know I am just hurt but don't understand why it continues to happen to me.

Now I met a 32yr old Scorpio but I have been totally up front with him. He says he can handle it but I have serious doubts. It totally blew me away when he wanted me to meet mom and dad...WTF I finally had to tell him that was not we discussed about going slow and exploring since I wasn't totally sure about my feelings at the moment since I was still trying to clean house of the Sagittarius.

I think my F***** love life is out the window and in chaos or I am just still reeling from the break up.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated for this insane Gemini.

I ended a marriage in 2009 after being separated 6 months. I was married to a Scorpio (11-21-61) for 4yrs and together for a total 10yrs. The marriage ended and began in the same month. At the end of 2009 I met a Sagittarius (12-13-71) which the relationship has just ended. Again began and ended within the same month. Now just met another Scorpio (10-28-79) but know this will not work and trying to end it. I feel so out of control with my personal life. All I want is to share my life with someone and I continue to find men who are needy, clingy, and demand my attention. It makes me feel like I am being a terrible person but beginning to think I am going to become cynical because I am not going to be able to trust. Just really don't know what to do anymore.

Suggestions anyone?!

Gemini

6-5-70

I've been dating a new guy who is a Sagittarius, Dec 13th. I am a Gemini, June 5. I know Gemini's are really fickle creatures putting it rather mildly. He is really a lovable guy but moves rather fast considering I am just getting back into the dating scene. I like the guy but (the ultimate but) also have lingering feelings for another guy I dated before him (August 6th). Leo and I are still friends and I really consider him my best friend. I think my feelings linger because we just tended to click in every way. The only reason I think Leo wants to be just friends because he had a bad accident and is really unsure of himself right now. Maybe just wishful thinking on my part. Then on the other hand the Sagittarius is also quite fun to be around but just not like Leo. I know they are two different men and I am trying to keep that in mind. I don't know maybe I am trying to rush things myself. I tend to hold back with Sagittarius. He says he loves me but I am just at the like stage right now. Maybe my problem is I tend to approach life like I do work and I am a workaholic and try not to be but can't help myself. Life without stress I just can't imagine it...LOL My mother does tell me I need to enjoy life more and I really don't know what that means. Sometimes I think Leo is there just to help me learn to let go of all the things that I cling to, like work. Any insight to my madness anyone?!

Thanks for the comments...I know I will make it through all this but sometimes think I am half crazy but work tends to keep me pretty busy and as the days pass it gets easier. When I finally do let it all go I will wonder what took me so long. Thanks Again!