VS, I think you misuderstood something I said... It's true that those kind of stories are scary, but by no means am I (at least, consciously) afraid of real people/relationships.
I feel like reading such stories (of unhappy marriages and then people leaving the marriage when they find someone else) polelutes my mind into thinking relationships are bound to be like that.
I don't want this to happen with me... sure, it may seem like an intellectually entertaining approach, to always look for someone ''better'', but if I want my spouse (and I'll accept it if you tell me I'm not making any sense, as I have no experience in this field) to be faithful to me, then I will also be faithful. Why not spend time thinking about how our spouse is great, and how we can overcome the problems in our relationship... instead of thinking how the next-door neighbor has a certain quality our spouse lacks.
If I have a stable marriage (or relationship, doesn't have to be a marriage), where both me and my wife are willing to make things work, then even if we're going through hard times (emotionally, mentally, or even financially) I'm not going to run away with the florist that's been winking at me.
*Sidenote: Have talked to R, on the phone. I was the one who called. She picked the phone up and I said ''uh... hi''(I didnt know what to say lol). She said hi and I said ''so... uh... how are you?'' and we continued the conversation. Kept things light, I did not mention or ask about the problems, and did not mention or ask about things between us.
She didn't seem mad. I am unsure whether this was her being nice, or whether she was trying to hurt me with indifference.
Today, she went with her parents to the north of portugal, so I texted her asking ''so are you in the north yet?'' and she replied ''we're going to have lunch in coimbra :p''
I replied ''I see, what you really want is «Bifes de perú com cogumelos e arroz queimado»!'' (Turkey with mushrooms and burned rice) which I made for her once, when she said she was hungry -had a class until 8pm- and asked me to cook something for her... I burned the rice a little but it was tasty nonetheless according to her.
This was at around midday, so considering its 8pm I doubt she will reply to the text still. She usually replies fast, so maybe she doesn't want too much closeness.. I'm not sure..
Also, after quite a while (not sure how long exactly) I grabbed my Rider-Waite deck from the shelf, and had a shot at a doing a reading for myself.
Tried to keep emotions away while drawing the cards.
Beforehand, asked the deck to give me clear signs, so I would come to the right conclusions.
Then I defined the reading.
   ---- 
4: Clarify the reading
Here's what I got:
1 - Justice
2 - Five of Pentacles
3 - Judgement
4 - King of Swords
Justice... not sure, but doesn't seem unfitting. I'm using some website to help me with the meanings when I'm not sure.
But of course, I have an idea of what the card means from the name or the image - That's why Rider-Waite is popular
Fairness, and trying to do what's right, and acting on ethical principles.
We've always tried to be sincere with each other, I think? Sure I messed up this time, but overall I always try to be true to my feelings with her.
5 of pentacles... the ''The bad times are here, but they will pass'' card.
Seems right also? These are bad times, for sure.
Judgement... not sure? The end of conflict, perhaps? Am not very familiar with this card.
Could it be the end of things between us? Or a new beginning?
Where I'm reading, this card seems to have an association with Justice
''deciding, accepting past mistakes/actions''
King of Swords seems to reinforce the meaning of the Justice/Judgement duo... since it seems to be an intellectual, analytical, just and rational card.
Any of you ladies care to comment?