A
Greenii74,
It’s true they can be flirts and not realize how much it would draw the other person in, especially when that person is in a vulnerable state. Quite often in the initial stages they will carry you away in the emotions of the moment and then reality pulls them back to analyze the permanence of those emotions.
You’re looking for an explanation because his seeming rejection has left you even more vulnerable but what’s really important is that you have to heal and he is actually doing you a favour by pulling back. The only way to bring him back at a friendship level is to keep it very casual which also means you have to expect less, “care” less; not worry about him thinking you’re crazy, or why he pulled away, or if he has a new romance etc. So if you are sincere in that you’re ready for just friendship then you have to take it down several notches as suggested.
The only way he will see you for who you is if you show him the real you. Why would he see anything different if that is who you’re being?