Posts made by dttn

Hey alleycat, how are things with you? I'm so glad you registered so that you could get some things off of your chest. I have found this to be very helpful in helping me deal with some of the things i have been going through the last few weeks. Jen inspired me to post on here as well and i thank her for starting this thread. These virgo men certainly are a strange breed living in their own world. Can I ask , how is your relationship with your husband. I ask because I am trying to work through that right now, trying to recapture some feelings I once had before this Virgo walked into my life and messed with my heart and told me he loved me. He has made quite a lasting impression and I 'm finding it very difficult to shake him. He is an unusual person ,not quite like anyone I have met before. On our most recent upheaval his wife found some text messages on his phone from me and I heard from him once 2 weeks ago and that was it. I'm trying to move on but it is so hard to get my head around some of the things he has said to me. Hang in there Alleycat you're not the only one bitten by the virgo.

dttn

Leonida,

Thank you for your post. I am trying to be accepting and open to anything put forward to me by my husband. I am having a hard time dealing with the loss of someone else while trying to gain back the feelings i once had. I guess it all takes time and although I am patient this type of thing makes me feel very anxious and I need to just chill a little I guess. I would love to hear from other people that have dealt with this and what they did to move forward after an affair of the heart.

dttn

Hi Sarah...my advice to you would be to read some of the postings under "the heart of a virgo man" you will find it very insightful and hopefully it will answer some of your questions.

dttn

Trice...Good to hear from you again. How are things with Scorpio?

I'm glad I gave you a chuckle with my post. Today was a bad day I have been riddled with anxiety unfortunately. This evening is much better. TIme heals all. I just have to take one day at a time. I'm really trying to connect with my husband but I admit I am finding it somewhat difficult. I guess I need to give myself some time to heal and clear my head.

Any thoughts from anyone would be welcome

Dttn

Anybody ? Really needing some imput here. Would love to hear from Libra males if there are any out there or other people who have gone through the same sort of thing. Feeling a little lost right now.

dttn

Hi all,

I have posted on here before in the love and relationships category. I am guilty of infidelity, I am a Capricorn wife of 22 years married to a Libra. I want to set things right in my marriage. My husband is aware of my actions and is forgiving. I must also point out that my husband is not a saint. He has been guilty of things in the past as well but both of us want to move forward together in this relationship. My problem is that I love my husband very much, he is my dear friend, we spend alot of time together and we get along incredibly well, we don't fight or call each other names but I don't feel the feelings I did before. I find I am bored with him, sometimes I feel like I am missing something, the passion is not there and s*x has become quick and thoughtless.

How do I start to rekindle the feelings I had for him before? Can that be done? How do I increase my self esteem and feel good about myself. How do I feel good about him? I want to make this work, I have to make this work.

Dttn

Very well written Messanger... It really hits home. Thanks

dttn

Messanger, I feel badly for you having to go through this, you are a few weeks farther ahead than I am in my break up. I ended the relationship just over a week ago and I am really hurting today. I guess as time goes by and I expect to hear from him reality sets in and I realize he's not calling this is the hard part If you have read previous posts by me you know my situation , his lack of contact yet asking me not to leave and telling me he loves me. I really need to look ahead and appreciate my husband who loves me I know. We have had our problems in the past as I'm sure you have.

Hang in there Messanger maybe we can gain strength from each other.

Mystral, I love your comment about no more hamster-wheel thinking about hiim-him-him and how

can you truly love and be loved if you are a prisoner of your own mental habits. Maybe if I let those thoughts go then I can move forward in my relationship with my husband.

Dttn

Hi all, just wanted to check in and see how everyone was doing. Nothing really to update regarding my Virgo who I guess is no longer my Virgo so I'll just call him Virgo Man.

He had called me last Tuesday to give what now I feel is some bull**** story about his wife finding text messages on his phone because he just happened to leave his phone at home ...on ...while he went to Chicago overnight from Friday to Saturday. It still doesn't explain why he didn't answer my frantic messages on Thursday when he was home. Lots of things have been going through my mind this past week about him and I can't help but feel that he was afraid of me and what I represented to him. Cheating !! But in his mind maybe he was thinking that in order to not hurt me he would hope that I would just fade away. That way he wouldn't have to tell me he wasn't interested. I just don't understand why you would continue to tell someone you love them when that really wasn't the case. To all you men out there. Don't tell a woman you love her if you don't mean it. Just be honest please!!!! We'll get over you.

Dttn

Trice, All the best to you with your Scorpio , I have had experience with them. They are amazing lovers but can't seem to be satisfied with life and are always looking for the grass being greener on the other side. They also think they are smarter than anybody and can fool people. Sneaky little Scorpions. But even with all that if they love you they are incredibly loyal.

Sorry I pissed you off with my texts to mr. virgo I must admit I wasn't too happy myself but caved in a moment of weakness. You'll be happy to know I have not heard from him since the morning he called me last Tuesday. But I'm doing okay.

Hey Jen, got your message so am continuing to do some posting here. thx.

dttn

Jen, that would be fabulous ...looking forward to it.

Dttn

Well, that was a good read Jen. I'm sure if we were to live closer to each other and became friends that we would be very good ones at that. I like you saying whatever you think. I hope i can do the same for you ..lol.

I don't imagine I will be hearing from Mr. Virgo any time too soon if what he told me is the truth then he will be in the dog house for awhile.

Yes i did meet him on line. I'd like to tell you more about that but not on here. I'd love to also share some of the history of my marriage with you but also not here.

I really question if Virgo is telling me the truth. Maybe you can pull a card for me and let me know what the tarot says.

If I have any advice for you Jen it would be to relax in your relationship with "R" . When i was with my Scorpio friend (and we are still friends , but just friends and have been for 5 years) it took me atleast the first year of our relationship to relax. Let things happen and unfold. I realized after a year that he wasn't going to leave me that he was going to call me often and that he really did love me. I had faith in him.

If you want to hear more let me know. I really enjoy chatting with you Jen.

Talk tomorrow

dttn

And Angel, I do want your opinion , I value it and your words have given me strength to deal over the last few days.

xx

dttn

Angel, I never said I was willing to accept his story and keep him in my graces and I also never said I think he loves me all the more, I only relayed the conversation as it happened. I am very skeptical about him, the fact is he gets nothing from me that would make him want to stay around. He doesn't get sx, so it's not like I'm giving him something in return. I have offered him friendship and love. I will go on with my life, I don't think his phone call this morning changes much of anything really. I don't think it puts him back in my good graces at all and I think he knows that. He has much to deal with if what he tells me is the truth , if he is lying then he only has to look in the mirror to see what he has to deal with if he chooses to. I look at the conversation I had with him this morning as putting the ball back in my court. I will not contact him again. I do however find some sort of amusement in the fact that his behavior has come back to bite him in the as. Hopefully for his future he has learned a valuable lesson. But I'm really not his teacher. He is a grown man, I wanted him to take responsibility for his actions and I think now he has to as it has been forced upon him.

I'm not a pushover, I didn't get to be 50 and successful because I'm daft. I'll admit that my heart gets a shite kicking sometimes but I'm a big girl. Its funny at some point yesterday I actually came to grips with the fact that I would not hear from him again so I had already reached a plateau on my own and I will take the next step to better my life and relationship with my husband but i don't shut people out, I don't hold grudges and I find it hard to hate anyone. I believe that people can be stupid and do stupid things and be hurtful and do hurtful things and generally for very selfish reasons. But i also believe in hope and that goes a long way for me.

I hope you give hope a chance.

dttn

oops, can't believe I wrote write / right....lol

See last line

Boy , as I right it out it looks so stupid. Wow.

.....................write is what it should say....lol

Okay. So here goes. Please pick yourselves up and wipe those smirks off your faces...lol..

I know I was shocked absolutely shocked.

I was soooo shocked that I'm driving to work and my phone rings I didn't even look to see who was calling because my brother or my girlfriend will often call me on my drive in so I just said Hello! and then I heard his voice "Hi" very soft , very timid

I paused because it had to register "Oh... hello" I said

"What can I do for you"? those were the first words out (sorry it wasn't something more stunning)

"How are you"? he says. "How the hell do you think I am, did you get my texts?" (sorry lightning shooting out of my eyes at this point).

"Well .... about those texts"..he says..."um well you see, on Friday morning I flew out to Chicago with my Dad I had to take him to see some relatives (okay his Dad is very old, and Mr. Virgo works for an airline and gets rock bottom flight prices) and I accidently left my phone at home. I was only gone from friday morning until saturday night but when I got back ...someone had read my text messages" (this is what he tells me)

"Im sorry that had to happen" I said , "why didn't you answer my earlier texts or call me on thursday like you promised?"

"I just got so busy with work and then my Dad had to rush to Chicago and I didn't get an opportunity to call" (at this point I want to say, what's wrong with texting you know like 10 words would do it but I bite my tongue because I want to know what else he has to say).

I'm shaking at this point and sure that my voice is quivering but I'm thinking about me.

"This is the first opportunity I've had to call you I am at the airport working this morning , she (the wife) has been keeping her eyes on me like a hawk" he then proceeds to issue many many many apologies, starts talking about how yes a friend is a friend always you know I would never do that to you. I'm not like that you know me" (hmmm do i?)

So ladies , don't you think at this point that maybe he would be a little angry at me for texting so much that his wife found out and don't you think at this point that he would be pissed about the explaining he would have to do to save his marriage.

Oh please your insight would be much appreciated now.

So he says " I can't talk long it's really busy here but we'll be in touch" "I love you".

I ended by saying "You need to take care of the problems you are facing right now" "I apologize if I caused this but Mr.Virgo this could have been prevented, you know it."

"Yes I know, I'm sorry" he says

and that was that we said goodbye he said "talk soon."

Boy , as I right it out it looks so stupid. Wow.

Dttn

So Jen.....Guess who called this morning?

lol oh Jen you always make me smile (and thats a good thing) and i love the fact that you are doing these readings for me you can do them whenever you wish. I'm actually having a pretty good evening considering. I think alot of what your reading says is so true. Its true there is that inexplicable little thing missing, I was just saying that to my husband yesterday. He was wondering why i was so down in the dumps but what I told him was true. I do believe my Virgo is caught in a personal conflict for sure he has talked of that. That was the one thing that kept us from having relations. More on his part than on mine. There was certainly alot of tension in that regard (s*xual tension I mean) Sometimes I used to think he was afraid to spend time with me for that very reason.

Being italian he was Catholic obviously and a very good boy if you know what i mean. He was actually a choir boy when he was younger and believe it or not has only had relations with 2 women in his life. I told you he was unusual.

Not your typical guy so that is why i am so bewildered at his mean behavior he is such a good man. I asked him at one point if he was afraid of me. I'm a little more open s*xually.

I can't really talk much tonight, the family is keeping me occupied. Ill follow up tomorrow

and also get back to you Angel.

dttn

Angel thanks for responding I was wondering what happened to you and I am so grateful for your support. It's been a rough weekend , god i hate wasting my time on this healing stuff..lol

I'm 99.9999% sure he is just being a total ***hole I just can't believe it, I really can't and I guess I'm having a hard time accepting that. As far as closure goes, I would have to say a big fat yes.

If he texted me back and said "Go away" or "I'm done here" or whatever ..I would say okay fine then atleast i would know he received my texts, he got the messages , he didn't care to acknowledge them I would be 100% sure that he has no heart and then I could mourn it and move on. Right now since i don't have that I have to figure out how to let it go and move on. I've got to say not an easy task. You even said you've been there.

If he acknowledged the texts I could say to myself. Okay , fine , he got the texts they didn't move him at all, he couldn't care less he is a coldhearted unfeeling iceburg and I could deal with that , I could live with the fact that it was all an act. He was playing me. I guess it's possible I'd still want to know why.

Yes Angel, I am married, yes I have had an affair but please don't make judgements until you read all the posts. There are things that my husband is guilty of as well and I'm not saying that makes it right, It just IS and if I told you the whole story you might say "My god, why didn't you leave him"?

Honestly I'm not even sure what I wanted from Virgo man, companionship, love, friendship all I know right now is I want to remove it from my brain because my head hurts.

No I don't have the number memorized actually, I think I know what it is but I'm not positive. I had him programmed in my phone so I never had to dial it.

dttn

and Jen, I thought your reading was awesome.