Thank you all so much! The distance is a killer and I do agree that it has an out of sight out of mind feeling. We do talk everyday but sometimes it's short and I definitely feel out of touch. @ Shaubby... My doctor is female but will be doing the procedure with another doctor who she respects a lot. It is a male but I haven't met him yet. Thank you for that insight. I'm having a hysterectomy for medical reasons and though it is so needed and I know I will feel so much better...I'm just plain scared. I've had surgery before but this is much more serious then before and I've had time to think about it....ha! Also, emotionally, I'm happy and sad that I will not have another baby. But I'm a firm believer in things happen for a reason. This part : First your work is very important to you and than you in the nightgown and the strange man , says that you are wanting intimacy and are afraid that other men may temp you: was right on. I think the other side of this is the last couple of years have been rough in this department because f my own condition and I just miss my husband a lot. i am very lucky though in that we have been on a rollercoaster of a relationship for many years but he is definitely been my soul mate and fully has supported me and the last two years have been the most wonderful. Sometimes you just have to wait for things to come together Emotionally, he is a great husband but there is definitely a disconnect when it comes to my feelings. I think he just feels I have such a strong personality that weakness isn't a question for him...when it comes to me so I do have to remind him I'm still a girl lol
The pigs still creep me out a bit only because I was absolutely bothered by them in my dream...almost devastated. I don't want to be greedy or have it all...but it would be nice if something went our way and plenty in the last few months has not. So I wonder if that's a reflection of that. Yet...I still go back to fate and everything happens for a reason. I know that if certain things had come to fruition...we may have been miserable. For now, I live with my parents. My mother is going thru chemo which is why I chose to do such a long training TDY with the military. I could have had it shortened. My husband tried to get stationed with me (He's active duty), via a humanitarian assignment due to my mother and we were denied. But now that I have been reliving my teenage years ( gag)...I realize that moving back here may not be the best idea and I find myself fantasizing about moving far far away. The ocean...We were stationed on the east coast for years and my husband is from Seattle. We are trying to get to either place and either place would make my soul flutter! So thank you for the insight and I realize I just threw a lot off my chest but it felt so good to do so..I couldn't stop typing.