Hi Virgoislandman,

What would a take for a virgo man to want to come back to a relationship that the virgo man ended. He said "i don't trust you and i'm sure you don't trust me" "i don't want to try, i don't want to give it a chance. you can't force it." When I asked him what he thought I meant by trying he answered that he takes it as being a couple again... I replied by telling him that we cannot go from this, 6 months of arguing since he left, to being a couple. that i want to see if we can try to have those feelings again. he said that he would reconsider the situation, read my messages, and to not expect an answer from him today, tomorrow, or next week. I figure it's going to take him awhile, so I told him that it we should stay away from each other since hanging out and chatting causes problems... I just want another virgos take on this situation... We haven't spoken in 10 days... seems too soon, but to me it's an eternity... should i give up? I'm a cappy and as such very determine to reach my goal... In this case though it's someone's affection that I want win over... we have a child, but we have an agreement where he gets him 2-3 times a week. Sorry for the essay ... :/... any suggestions would be great! oh and he's "going out with someone, but it's not serious"... he said that to a mutual friend.... sigh...

Addy, I will mention you in my prayers. I am ever so humble by your words. May God bless you constantly and show you light when you encounter darkness. I hope & pray that there will always be someone there for you when you need them just like you have been here for me. I cannot find the words to express my gratitude. I'm a much more calm cappy because of you Addy!

jamesgill

love the feedback, but i think people would appreciate a little more info. on the spellcaster.... wink wink some spellcaster do not mess with peoples free will, you just have to ask them straight out if they do.

Hello Addy, for some reason that click to me to call you by in short... If you don't like it let me know and I'll come up with another name!

I teared up cause you were right! You picked up the emotions so well that it shocked me. I'm impressed that you picked up on the sex of our child since I never mentioned it... YOU ARE VERY GOOD AT THIS! Can't tell you how grateful and appreciative I am for your time and patience with reading my posts... <3...

So your advice is to: Not call him, Not being around where he's at, and Not remind him that the door is open for him?

So in other words live my life as if I've moved on from him and dedicate myself to our child.

Believe me when I say that I'm trying. Started up with my old hobbies again and he knows it.

One question if you don't mind answering... Can you see him coming back if I can manage to show the world that I've moved on? That I'm not waiting on him?

Bless your heart and soul for your time and patience with this poor woman...

aaawww... Addictdtoriches... Your post almost made me cry... Yes, you are on target with everything you wrote... I can't tell you how much I GREATLY appreciate your advice... I will mention you in my prayers...

I can only hope and pray that he'll give this another chance, another try, but I know that he's thinking it'll be force cause he told me! I'm giving him space because he told me that I don't give him time to think things through. I hung out with his family about a week ago, but kept my distance from him since I was there for our child. I'm just going with the flow and not looking for him. It's very hard cause our child keeps asking for him and I use to call him when that would happen. Now I know that it was only making him feel guilty for not being there. I don't want to hurt him and I stopped contacting him since apparently it seems like it's doing more damage than good. Hopefully he'll miss me and he'll come around once he sees how life is without me. We miss him, but know that he's going through a lot right now. I know he misses us, plus he got excited when I went our to his families house. He was making sure I was comfortable the whole time I was there and tried to extend my time there too. We were nice to each other, which was different. He's seeing some one, but like he told a close friend, "it's not serious". they've been going out since the year started and nothing has come of it. I think it has to do with me since he's not too sure what to do with me. there are times when i know he doesn't think we can be a family since our relationship has been turbulent since he left. At the same time he told me that he hasn't thought about it in depth. He told me "looks like you've thought about this through, I need to catch up to you."

Sorry for the essay... I really hope he's reading my messages and taking the time to think about our situation. He knows he has my heart and he knows that I want an answer now. I'm sure since it's only been a little over a week that he's waiting for me to do something. A text, email, voicemail, or a call is what he's waiting for from me since I always break and can't give him enough to think. I can't tell you how hard it is at night to not call him. I almost did last night. I really don't know if I can hold out any longer. If I do contact him then I know I'll lose all that weeks worth of "peace"... It's kind of like I wish I had a crystal ball that would tell me how long I have to wait... hahahahah... wouldn't that be nice! I think everyone would love that!

I'm just not sure if I should just give up already... I really do want him to be happy and if I'm causing him grief then it's best I let him be... I really hope I can give him enough time to think and not let my emotions take over and want to call him. I'm proud that I haven't called him, so far. I feel bad that I missed his calls, but I just didn't see the point of him calling me at night. If it's about our child he can text or leave a voicemail. I'll respond to that, but chatting at night when I know he doesn't like it can only turn bad... I know he likes to talk to me, but why give him what he likes if he's not going to even consider buying the cow! He's pretty simple and easy going, so when he's getting what he wants he doesn't do anything to ruin it. I just want him to consider dating me again to see if we can re-kindle that loving feeling... you know?

thank you again... any other advice would be lovely Blessed Be...

Hi Reneemarie67,

If it's any consolation... you and I are in the same boat... We can chat in detail if you like, sometimes I find that it helps... I try to do my own readings since I own 3 tarot decks for the last 10 years, but can't seem to read my own... :(, but do pretty good for others...

mis.dias.mis.noches [at] gmail.com

Hi Intensered,

I replied to you on another forum under Blogbacktalk... I titled it "For Intensered, Your Virgo advice"

Thanks

Hello Intensered,

Thank you so much for taking the time to give me sound advice. Unfortunately, you are very right. I say unfortunate cause I feel like it's too late for us now... These past 6 months have been so confusing. We fight, I cry, he leaves. He said your words "think about this logically" and when I do I lose a lot of hope. I wish he would use his heart instead of his head... I haven't "talked" to him since mother's day. I miss him so much and I'm sure he's not thinking about our situation. He's dating other girls, but I know it's not serious cause he tells his buddies it's nothing. I plan to just let him be and pray to God that his heart will soften and his mind will open to the idea of trying. I've asked for his forgiveness for my behavior these past months, but if he makes his choice based on those months then there is no chance for us.

I want to tell him to please give me 1 chance, 1 try, for all the times I forgave him. I know it's childish to throw it back in his face, so I won't, but I hope and pray that he does think about those times. That he thinks about the good times and all the possible great times as a family. I hate this, our child deserves better than this. Our child asks for him on a constant basis, before I would call him every time our child would ask for him. Now I realized that all it did was make him feel guilty for not being there instead of making him miss us... I was dead wrong and he probably thinks I was trying to make him come home that way. He's always thought that I'm using our child to get him back. Well, after our talk we both know things need to change and we're trying. This sucks so much cause I can't help but get bummed out and our child notices.

I pray to God to help him, to guide him, to bring him home. Of course I made matters worse by constantly asking him and fighting with him to come home. Who would want to come back when all you do is fight even when you're not there... I'm lost and I feel so helpless... I know I have to be strong and I have to think positive and above all pray... Even still, I feel like all is lost...

I need to keep reminding myself that he said he would re-think the situation, would read my messages again, but that he won't have an answer for me by next week. At this point I guess I should be lucky to hear anything about it from him by the end of the year... I hope he does want to talk about it and in a positive way...

"hello

I read you ...I just thought to write you because my husband is also a virgo...so i thought may be i can say something...Look...whenever we have fight on any issue....i have realized that if i give him time to realize his mistake(if it is)...or to understand the situation...it has better results than feeling like lost and confused...Virgos take their time to analyze things, applying their logic and then taking a decision...if they are disturbed in between their respective system is also disturbed...I think you should give him time to understand your feelings... meanwhile, you should not forget to show your concern that you care about the relationship but that must be smooth not attached deliberately. ....and yes avoid violent arguments( if happens)take care ...god bless you !!! "

Dear Natapier,

Thank you so much for taking the time to look into this for me. You have no idea how grateful I am, rest assured I will mention you in my prayers.

"it may be time to forgive and forget over past problems. Start fresh." When I read this, my heart sank as I recall not too long ago telling him this, except for the forgetting part. I have forgiven him, but have not told him, instead I asked him to forgive me. We both know it was our doing for not trying to support each other. I just really feel that we didn't give it our best, that we didn't communicate and it lead to mistrusting each other. That's where we are at, no trust.

You are right on target when you wrote : "your beloved is undergoing a rough time"... He has a lot of conflict within himself. He can't seem to find his place in the world. He's trying his best to move up in life, but can't seem to figure out if he should find a better career or go back to school. Plus, he's thinking of how not to further mess up our child's life. Those are his words. I really hope I can figure this out. I do feel lost as to my actions, but now I feel better knowing that we're trying something different. A new approach to the situation. However, my mind can't help and think of the damaging words that he spoke that give me no hope. "I'm not coming back. I told you I don't do the back and forth thing." The funny part is when I told him that I want us to try he thought I meant to be an "instant" couple again. I explain and told him that we cannot go from this to being a couple. That I want to try and see if we can have those feelings again. In the end he just said that he'll rethink about what I said and read my messages again. This has sparked hope in me again...

I'll try my best to focus on what I want and rest assured that I don't let people make decisions for me. I'm a bit aggressive and people usually just listen when I need to vent. I hardly ever follow peoples advice, unless of course I ask for it!

I will definitely rethink your message to me Natapier. Seriously, you have no idea how much I appreciate it that you took the time to do this for me. MANY BLESSINGS TO YOU ALWAYS!

THANK YOU <3!!! Ever so humble....

To stick with the topic of the thread, I must concur with the whole "finding your parent in your partner"... My high school boyfriend was to the T like my father and they are the same sign! However, slowly I learned that he wanted to control me just like my father and the relationship went south...

I also in a relationship were it was just lust. The man had power and wealth and I was able to share it with him, however when it came down to being romantic and doing little things it always felt forced... I stood for his great movements in bed!

Now I find myself loving someone that I wish I wasn't hurting and have decided it best to just leave it alone. I want him to be happy and if I'm making him miserable it pains me so. I don't want either of us to be in pain. Happy productive people is best for society...

THANKS AGAIN CAPTAIN!!! <3!!!