Anytime Gemi13, I wish you all the best life has to offer. I will check back in for updates in case anything changes.

Good luck to you, too, Ethereal127. Relationships are always an experience, for sure. You seem to have a very positive attitude which is a beautiful thing and are managing the relationship ride nicely. You probably have a very strong sense of self, a powerful gift to have mastered.

ArizonaSunday~*

That is the beautiful thing about choice, no matter the road you choose, you will learn. However, some roads have a few more chuck holes to go through and boulders to maneuver around. Ultimately, we all create our own destiny depending on the roads we choose to take, neither right nor wrong, simply a learning and growing experience.

Arizona~*

(cont).............There are 3 levels of emotional maturity and I'm sure we all know people that fit into each catagory. There is a very immature emotional nature that immediately reacts with drama to any situation. Name calling, throwing things, etc. Basically, the person experiencing the emotion is only concerned about themselves and wanting to be heard or catered/nurtured to. They may emotionally destroy everyone around them in their rath but are unable to see beyond themselves. This kind of behavior only creates karmic energy that will eventually need to be dealt with. This may be a person who hasn't learned to communicate with words or someone who has not had their feelings validated and they need to be noticed at all costs. Think of a 2 year old...they react with tantrums because their vocabulary hasn't been developed enough and the only way for them to express themselves is through this type of behavior.

The next level is a person who has the ability to control their emotions up to a point until they can no longer contain it and then explodes into the above mentioned behavior. Again, the key here is communication. Holding it in doesn't solve the issue, it only allows it to fester and the person hopes the other party can read their mind and make them feel better. If the other party can't read into what the person is needing, alot off resentment takes place creating a bigger prolblem. Of course, no one can read minds and alot of issues can be misunderstood but the final result is the eventual explosion creating karmic lessons down the road.

The emotional maturity we must all strive to master is having the ability to manage our emotions in a healthy way so that we don't lash out at another person causing pain. Even if the other person is the one who hurt us. Communication is the magical solution. I'm not saying to learn how to hide your emotions or not feel them. It's being able to experience the emotion, understand them and talk about them in a healthy way until the problems resolved. When we master this level, and we no longer create larger karmic lessons, our lives will run a bit smoother.

What this is all coming down to is addressing Gemi13 in being able to manage this rollercoaster ride with his dignity in tact and not creating a scenario that makes him look like the crazy one.

I think we've all been awed by those people that seem to handle every situation with class. Sandra Bullock is a prime example of a person who must be going through alot of emotional turmoil but has never one time said an ugly remark about the other parties involved in her pain. The tabloids and the world are hovering like vultures just waiting for her to make a negative comment so they can make their millions in magazines. Let's all learn from her.

My Sun Aqua, Moon Sadge, Mercury, Pisces, Venus Aries. I'm sharing this because of previous comment about your Aqua girl being able to express herself. And if I can remember correctly, her mars was also Aries. As you can see by my posts, I like to be straight up and honest in what I see going on with this interaction. I don't want to give falso hopes if I see an Aquarian behavior that I recognize as "friend" verses something more. I don't want to lead you into the slaughter so to speak. If I'm into someone, that person would never have to read between the lines and I would never risk any type of shady behavior like forgetting to call that person if the person was someone I wanted to connect with.

I see an aqua girl who loves everybody and is having a good time in her life and is wanting to include you but is far from relationship mentality. She just wants you to be light and fun and to have no expectations. Even if you both ended up on some spontaneous rendezvous at some point, this would still be seen as a fun, friendly good time to your aquarian girl. She would want you to be as non-chalant about it as she would be. You wouldn't be any closer to her after that kind of encounter as you are now. Aquas are very capable of separating sex and love. For an aqua to commit to love, there are alot of ideals that the person would have to meet.

I know you may not want to hear any of this but I think you need to decice if you can manage the "friend" card tactfully. If not, then let this one go. Hold your head high and keep your dignity in one piece, chalking it up to experience. Be friendly with her but expect nothing would be my suggestion.

You have alot to give someone who can appreciate and respect the person you are on a soul level. Life is too short to waste it on a relationship that causes you pain or doesn't allow you to be comfortable just being yourself. Settle for relationships that make you a better person, not ones that destroy your soul.

ArizonaSunday~*

Gemi13,

Now back to the subject at hand, my dear Gemi13 friend and his state of complete Aquarian confusion. Sometimes we confuse ourselves as well and it's only through many years of self analyzing, introspection, and analyzing others' behavior (a typical Aquarian trait) that I can understand a larger picture to share with you here.

There maybe some truth to the comment made [...maybe it's a younger Aquarian thing...] that more 'games' (using that word lightly) are played by Aquarians. I think that what is understood as 'games' intentional or unintentional by ALL individuals is simply an early human behavior used in trying to understand one another's boundaries, personalities, interactions of each other, and learning our own inner selves and how to adapt to the behavior of others, especially when it comes to attraction.

I'm speaking about ALL signs, especially when you're younger. Attraction, chemistry, hormones, love or whatever you want to call it is when we are most vulnerable and nothing is more painful than a broken heart. So 'games' (I dislike that word) is the little dance of one foot in, one foot out, two steps forward, two steps back, that happens when we guard our hearts from pain and as we learn to connect with each other. The older you get and the more you understand yourselves and where your own personal boundaries are, the less you have to go through this stage of wonder. Actual communication with words takes the place of trying to read between the lines and understand what someone is trying to say to you with their behavior. I believe that this stage of your relationship development is important, however. It's as important as learning to crawl before you walk.

I'm continuing my comments, this was getting too long so I thought I would post it as I continue on here....................................................................(cont)

This is to everyone reading this thread.

I'm in the middle of writing the flip side of Zodiac signs and trying to create a fun play of words to make people relate and laugh at the same time. So far, I'm getting great response with them. Everywhere you look, you find the positive gifts and talents of what the signs represent but you never see much of the signs ugly side. To everyone who reads this, please take it with a grain of salt. It is strictly for fun and not to be taken seriously and not to offend anyone. I think it's important in life to laugh at ourselves and that includes the side of us that may not be so pretty. The ones I have completed are: Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces, Cancer, Almost finished with Libra.

I think sharing the flip side of Aquarius with everyone here will confirm some of our quirkiness that we are all talking about here. I hope you can all join me in a good laugh at ourselves. For those of you reading who are not Aquas, you'll get a good look at some of the characteristics we are accused of.

It's formatted completed different of course but at least you can read the words.

Aquarius

January 21st - February 18th

Eccentric, Stubborn, Psychedelic, Talks to Trees, Inventive, Independent, Retro, Vintage, Loves People, Hates People, Mentally lives on the planet “Elsewhere,” Understands the word “Groovy.”

Don’t waste your time and energy trying to figure out an Aquarian. They defy all logic and reason. They’re not from our world so on the rare occasion they do decide to visit the rest of us here, their minds are still stuck somewhere we’ve never been, nor really care to go. You’ll never understand them and they’ll never understand you. Try not to lose too much sleep over this tiny, insignificant fact because no one else will.

Aquarians are kind to everyone, cheerfully ignoring anything you have to say. Blatantly insult them and they’ll ignorantly smile right back as if your cutting remarks were transparent.

You can always pick out an Aquarian in a crowd. They're the one's dressed a bit off, the one's trying out a new dance move they just invented, and the one's who could care less if you liked it or not. You are irrelevant and simply take up space.

If an Aquarian is showing brief interest in you, it's only because you're stranger than they are so don't go patting yourself on the back. As soon as they have siphoned and dissected every morsel of your brain, they'll flip you off like a light switch and walk away. Chin up, my friend! Save your humiliation for another day or another sign. An aqua-air person is incapable of recognizing your emotional pain. Some even speculate if they're capable of any human emotion.

When it comes to companionship, give up now! They have no heart. “Commitment” is synonymous with “prison” and the majority would rather welcome a hardy drilling of their teeth, void of anesthesia, than commit to anyone or anything. Set your sights on an easier target, which would pretty much be anyone else, and stop wasting your time on this alienistic specie who barely speaks your language. They’ve already forgotten you by now, anyway. Wipe your tears and move on!

Copyright 2010

Arizona Sunday

Dear Gemi13,

I've written you a response twice and kept deleting them. So, at this point I best write back tomorrow but I will quickly mention that I'm pretty sure she will have an excuse for why she did not get back with you. Dr Phil says, "We teach people how to treat us." Simply meaning, know your "deal breakers" and don't allow anyone to disrespect you. However, at the same time, do not disrespect her when you discuss what happened but its important that you're honest and tell her that was way uncool. Be emotionally mature about how you say it. Remain dignified and don't create negative karmic energy. Your thoughts and your words are infinite and live forever so be conscious about what you send out. Inside yourself, if you listen past your emotional upset, you will know the answer to any question you are asking about this situation. ONLY YOU can decide if her excuse is legit and ONLY YOU can decide what to do with the information you get from her.

Also, don't get caught up in the fact that she was cool about going on a trip with you. An Aquarian can go on a road trip for a week and still consider it a friendship and not think twice about it. I'm guilty of this very thing in my younger years and I was surprised that "my friend" thought it was more.

I will say that when I'm into a guy, I would NEVER forget to call him. Just food for thought. Personally, I feel some of her behavior is unacceptable. We must all be responsible for relationships, no matter how small or grand they may be, because it is only throw relationships that our soul evolves. If she is not being respectful of you and your relationship, you need to be respectful and responsible for yourself. You sound like a great guy and you deserve someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Accept NOTHING less.

The world is full of cell phones she could have used to call you...just saying.

Chin up, my friend and I'll check back in tomorrow.

ArizonaSunday~*

Oh how I LOVE a great suspense thriller!!! I'm on the edge of my seat : D

ArizonaSunday~*

Thank you 'Worthy1248' and 'Gemi13' for your kind words. I simply have a few more years and a few more relationships on you is all. (including Gemini's) : }

Star4u has good advice once you have an established relationship. We do not like figuring out what someone means by reading between the lines. We like friends and partners to tell us EXACTLY what they want and what they are meaning....no games. It takes alot of wasted, emotional, energy to be in a relationship with someone who is never straight up. This type of relationship is usually short lived and exhausting.

In your case, my Gemi13 friend, you haven't established a relationship as of yet so light, fun, optimistic is what's going to keep you around and NO MORE comments about, "What if her friends don't like me." Not very attractive.

CONFIDENCE, CONFIDENCE, CONFIDENCE! They'll like you perfectly fine as long as you are being yourself. Don't be obnoxious and try to do things for attention. You are going there for one thing only....just to have a good time. She's not asking you to go with her.......she's asking you to go with her and all her friends. Her friends are her safe guard. She would be too vulnerable on a one- on-one date with you. This is a safe way for her to learn more about you in a fun environment. You need to be exactly the same way.

In fact....you may want to consider bringing some of your guy friends along so you feel more comfortable...(if that's appropriate to where you're going). Tell her you'll meet her there and then you can talk to her in a laxed atmosphere and also mix and mingle with everyone else.

DO NOT be the puppy on her heels because that won't fly. Talk to her for awhile then move on and talk to someone else. Walk around for a bit, then come back and chat some more, then move on. No leeching, whatever you do! She will personally ask you to stay around her if that's what she wants.

If she is friendly but doesn't ask you straight out to stay and talk to her, then move on to another group to talk. If she talks to you for a bit and then goes off to talk to someone else she sees, move on...do not stand there and wait for her to come back. Just be happy and fun about the whole thing...no attitude!

Just have fun and be yourself....with CONFIDENCE! (key word)

Quote: Arizona, please check in more often my aquarian friend!!

The recent eclipse has brought to surface some health crisis with friends. I have spent alot of time with them in the hospital and, unfortunately, one of them has a long road to recovery so I will check in as often as I can between hospital visits and busy life.

Hang in there!

ArizonaSunday~*

Gemi13,

Number 1 thing to remember about Aquarians... we're all about FREEDOM! Freedom to laugh, freedom to love, freedom to think, freedom to act, and freedom to simply be who we were born to be.

In addition, we allow and respect that same freedom and unique individality of every person. That's what we find so fascinating and beautiful with people and why we can be friendly with all walks of life. There is never judgment, only acceptance. Sometimes, playfulness, friendliness and showing interest in someone can be interpreted as more than was intended.

When we find the other person has misunderstood our intent and begins coming on in a fashion that we are not ready for, we immediately distance ourselves enough to keep the person from getting too close (which may be interpreted as playing games) but we may truly adore the person and want to keep them as friends or even a possible relationship later on when we can feel them out a bit better.

If they feel rejected by OUR giant step backwards and they become distant, we will try to keep the contact going to some extent because there really is something we like about that person and we do not want them to completely back out of it.

We want to keep it light and fun...nothing heavy until we're ready for heavy. Any attempts to stifle and suffocate an Aquarian from the freedom that is second nature to their BEING, will only result in disaster.

Please do not confuse 'freedom' with an inability to commit because that is FAR from the truth. It is for the sheer fact that we are 100% committment oriented that we steer away from it until we are good and ready. BECAUSE... when we give our word about something or choose to commit to someone, it is completely unbreakable. We are loyal through and through. We value high ideals and we settle for nothing less, especially from ourselves.

Our fear of someone getting too close to us when we are not ready is more a fear of our own ability to commit when we are not ready to. Then we feel 'stuck' instead of committed and there goes our beloved freedom. Choosing committment is freedom, finding ourselves 'stuck' is prison. I hope that makes some sense.

So.... it may seem that Aqua's play games but in reality our nature is often misunderstood. Games are way too heavy for Aqua's who are simply in play mode.

There are two kinds of guys we adore... The strong, confident, HE MAN that usually ends up being bad news in the long run for us (I'm speaking for myself) and/or the guy who has been our friend, who allowed us to be ourselves, laughed at our qwerks; the guy who was there for us when we needed a shoulder to cry on or the dependable guy we knew we could count on when we had a flat tire....suddenly we see them in a different light and we fall in love.

Gemi13... I see your Aqua girl as wanting to keep you around but she is playing the 'distance' card. I believe your window of being the HE MAN has closed (which is fine because you have to be your true self to be happy, anyway) but she is not ready to close the door completely. She is still feeling you out. There is something she really likes about you but she has to analyze you a bit more.

DO NOT take this as rejection by any means. If she were rejecting you, she would flip you off like a light switch and you'd never hear from her again. HOWEVER... since you are still being analyzed, you need to play it 'kewl.'

Any emotional outburst will end it for you...guaranteed! Stop the game playing because that may be what has caused her to step back. Aqua's do not like game playing and she will never call you out on it, but she will be turned off immediately by it. It's not too hard to figure out.

You need to be yourself, DO NOT initiate any texts or communications but respond back to hers in a fun, light manner. I suggest going out with her and her friends, be yourself, laugh, have fun, talk to other girls. DO NOT try to 'hit' on her (figure of speech). When she feels that you are no longer coming on to her, she will relax and you both will be able to get to know each other better....then you will have a much better chance at getting close to her.

She may still be seeing her old boyfriend, and maybe other guys for all you know. You are not in a relationship with her and bringing it up would not be wise. She most definitely is not committed to him and I'm sure he is slowly going the wayside. She has the right to do what she wants... you guys are still in talking mode so making a comment about it would only make you look like the crazy one.

She is open to finding someone to connect with.... take that information and run with it. BUT, just remember to be the fun, lighthearted guy that is likeable and step away from her comfort zone until she invites you back in. She will make it perfectly clear when that time comes.

Apologies if I'm too straight forward but I'm on your side, Gemi13. I can see that there is something about you she really likes and I want to help you connect in the best way possible.

Hang in there : D

ArizonaSunday~*

Gem13,

"If she mad ONE little move..." Hmmm, I believe she has made her move and made herself clear.

"...like tried to kiss me something..." Again, you need to be the one kissing HER. I'm pretty sure she'll return the favor. However, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

"...believe me i'll be making moves back at full force and I wont hold back..." Of course you will, once SHE makes the MOVE. I'm not sure I'd call that "making moves." There's action and reaction. Trust me, if you're reaction, she'll be bye bye within a week. AM I RIGHT AGAIN MY AQUARIAN SISTERS?

I do want to make a very important comment, however. You must be true to yourself and listen inside to who you really are and YOUR needs for personal growth. Never do anything that is contrary to your natural Self. Is it hormones or compatibility? Your true self intrinsically knows the answer already.

I'm a much older Aquarian (but, always young at heart). My Mars and ASC are in Cancer so I feel your pain when it comes to not feeling comfortable about putting it out there and face possible rejection. But, that is the negative side of Cancer and something we must always work on. Use it's positive qualities along with all your Gemini whit and playfulness. Be who you are!

You say her words don't fit her actions... Well, first of all, she's going to have alot of words because she has a Gemini moon....she has her assertive mars that is action all the way... and then, just by being an Aquarian means she's a walking contradiction. That can confuse anyone! We confuse ourselves most of the time! We are ruled by 2 very different planets.....Saturn, fixed and disciplined and crazy, wacky Uranus that we are always plugged into. Go figure. BUT... when it comes to love, her Venus is cautionary, methodical, disciplined, Saturn ruled Capricorn. Venus Cappies don't jump in head first....they need to make sure that you're the one that's going to tame her wild side and be her rock!

So read past all her Gemini/Aquarian words and know that your gentle, nurturing Cancer that you possess is very compatible with her disciplined Venus. (You still need to make the move, though and be her strength)

Here's a little diddy I copied for you....Mars in Aries natives are easily irritated by indirectness from others. They expect others to say things straight, no beating around the bush. They easily become impatient with convoluted plans, or with people they consider to be slow to action.

Make THE move and be yourself and please don't leave us waiting, my friend. You have a nice support group of qualified Aqua's in your court to counsel you along your journey.

ArizonaSunday~*

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