I'm glad I was able to help with your initial question. I consider myself a 'pro' at scorp/scorp relationships. lol
It's really important that you do a comparison natal chart if you are are seriously considering staying in the relationship with your boyfriend. This is the only way to find out if you are compatible and complimentary to each other. It would show your compliments to each other and your challenges. Challenges being the key word here, and it would answer your questions about the year and 4 days difference in your birthdays. In my three notable scorp loves the differences were all over the place, 4 yrs 11 days, 8yrs (him younger) 5 days, and presently only 17 days separate our birthdays.
As far as getting mad and being unable to maintain it.... all I can say is I don't do mad. My exhusband (the young one) used to get mad at me at the time and never really explain WHY he was mad. It drove me crazy for many years of our marriage and at some point I gave up getting mad and having someone mad at me - just didn't care anymore if he was mad. If he was mad I figured it was his problem not mine. I never did a comparison chart with him and had I, I might have been able to foresee the heartache that would follow.