I just wanted to know if someone could give me a reading.
my birthday is 06/17/1988
I just just recently made a decision to end a friendship and feel as if I am just stuck, but I do feel as if it is the right thing to do.
It just sucks feeling so weak...emotionally.....I can't help it. So it begins no contact, no friends.... I know I am strong and I can get through this. I even picked up an extra job so now 2 jobs + school. lol to keep my mind off things. It gets better everyday.
So I am just updating you guys, "going with the flow".................
I ended up ending our "friendship"
because I was getting too hurt, It really wasn't a friendship. Although I still want to see him and I want him in my life, I think it's for the best. In reality it was friends with benefits and I can't do that without having someone be committed to me. I told him how I felt already, I even told him I feel that I love him. He says he feels we aren't there yet. We went through almost getting back together, but in the end he says he feels like it's not the right time. Finally, I asked him yes or no are we together because I'm tired of all this. He said "I feel like its not the right time" I said its a yes or no question. He's just quiet for a while and I said " I guess its no then?" and he said "I guess so" then I told him we can't be friends no more. Not because I don't want him in my life, but because I care about him I am getting hurt.
I deleted contacts with him such as fb and phone number. I am having a pretty hard time adjusting. I'm just wondering do Leo's regret some things? or will leo's (or do you think he) will ever contact me again?
I just feel used, and that he did not respect my feelings. He knew how I felt. When I talked to him in person about it and asked him what he thought about the situation. He said he never really thought about it. It's just hard because he never tells me how he feels. On rare occasions when he does say things like "I missed you" or "I like this about you" its like he is opening up, but he doesn't express much verbally, I just want to know how he is feeling.
I sent him an email like several hours when I got off the phone after ending things just to "express" my emotions lol. Right after I hung up with him, I called him again to let out some things I forgot to say such as how he led me on knowing how I felt, and what about last time? because the last time we hung out he said things that kind of initiated we are back together. After that day I just sent a friendly text saying are we back to together to confirm? He totally ignored the question that's what led to this whole confrontation and ending it. I kind of called him jerk also (this was on voicemail =/ I mean he was.)
In the end, I'm like I am done trying for someone who never even "thought" about, who it never crossed their mind, because I was so special I wasn't even worth a single thought. (I know I was bitter at the moment)
I just felt like I was the only one trying, and I was. I told him nothing comes easy. Relationships require 2 ppl who if they want it to work, they would work at it. He only cared about himself. I don't know, I mean hes 9 years older then me. I just feel like his past experiences, he would be more mature?
This man was very special to me. I just don't ever know what he's thinking, he won't open up or tell me how he is feeling, but I do know that he said he sees us "growing old together."
Let me know what you think? Or any leos what is your perspective? What do you think this guy is thinking? thanks for reading, I know it's LONG lol
I had asked him to hang out today, but he said no. I wanted to see a movie but he said he didn't want to see that one and there's nothing else out. So i asked if he want to still hang out and he said no. I think he just needed a break from seeing me this week. I am glad he doesn't ever make stupid excuses like ohhh I can't bc i have blah blah. He just flat out says no. Like if he doesn't want to he says no, if yes then yes.
Well, he just wants me to finish school so I can get that out of the way and find a job. He knows that I do want to move in with him because I am attending a new school this fall and its only like 5 mins from his place, I could always stay with him and its more convenient. It might be difficult to stay over but I think I can figure out a way when the time comes. Yeah, I talked to a few people and I thought about it 2 ways:
I know how he is and I feel like he does really care about me, it is just how he is (I know how he is!). Certain people don’t understand it like with friends I talk to about it bc he has such a distinct personality, very fixed in his ideas and opinions. With the living arrangement, he says he gets upset whenever I have to leave and can’t stay. He told me it drives him crazy. He doesn’t show it, but it makes him nuts. He feels he shouldn’t be restricted to see me. Like he should be entitled to see me whenever he wants….So I guess that is why he can’t be with me at the moment.
The other way I see it is that if he can’t sacrifice his selfishness to be with me, then he is not worth it, but at the same time I am not being understanding of him. But I feel like he isn’t being very understanding with me and my efforts to be with him. (Nothing is keeping us apart from being together the only thing is him, him and his selfishness bc he doesn’t get to see me as much as he wishes, I think it’s ridiculous, I feel like I rather pick to see someone and be with them then not at all. But that is how he is.) I feel like his selfishness will make him lose me….
Actually this March we are going to take a trip to Austin for the weekend because his friends are playing a concert. I am not quite sure, but I intend on after the trip to let him know, I can’t see him no more. I can’t be his friend because it is too painful for me. He can of course contact me, but seeing him it is hard because whenever I see him we act as if we are together. I can’t do that if he is not willing to be with me. It should only be friends period. Nothing else.
I still want him in my life and I want him to know that I won’t just leave him like everyone else did in the past. Basically, I want to prove myself to him, the only way is time and being there. It just seems like theres no compromise right now, basically we are just hanging there now b/t being friends but not really. I guess you can say friends with benefits, although I don’t want to say it that way, but it is that way. He can’t control himself when he is around me, I can control myself, but I want him just as badly. Lol! I know I set myself up for disappointment. I just think being friends will hurt more in the long run.
He said its all wrong timing.
“and he actually said he is selfish. because he feels it is selfish to demand so much of you, but he can't help it”
Exactly what he said! He said he feels like he shouldn’t have to compete because I have so many other priorities school, work, and family that I have do now.
I just cannot decide if we should remain friends or not, I guess we can talk just not see each other if so group settings with ppl in b/t us (haha!). Of course the chance in the future is always there, I mean anything can happen b/t then, but that chance/possibility is always there. I am headed towards being friends, talking and what not. If we are alone go out to eat or something..and that’s it. But everytime we do that he wants a hug and I cannot say no and it turns out to be a really intense hug! >.<
Also, I haven’t told him I loved him yet, but I know I do. I probably won’t say anything, I do not know if he feels the same way. It would just make things more complicated, and I do not plan on saying anything. I am pretty sure he knows how I feel by now.
He told me he has never been in love before, only one time and she was a friend from elementary and had passed away awhile ago. But as far as everyone he has dated, he said he has been in 4 relationships that he considered serious and they all ended the same way. I highly doubt he would ever tell me he loves me first, unless I did first hahah! It has almost been 6 months I am glad so bc well he’s never been passed 6 months w/ anyone. So it would be a big deal for him.
This week was good/bad, I almost thought we were back together. =/
Anyways, thanks again for your insight! It is wonderful to get such great feedback and hear someone else perspective. It helps out so much. I appreciate it very much.
When I graduate next summer and when I find a job, I would like to move out and live with him.
yeah exactly, I don't want to be just friends, I am finding it very difficult and it is hurting me. We can't be together right now either because of his selfishness, that's it.
I guess that's all we can do just be friends now.
It's just if he finds someone else later this year or something, it just feels like I never got that chance
So I have news! lol
I talked to him and he told me he wants to be with me. He did not contact me because he did not want to bother me and I am here wanting to contact him, but didn't think I should because I felt like I was contacting him too much. wow.
The issue is, I am not sure if Leos are just like this, but he said he is very selfish.
It is difficult because I am still living at home and besides that living with grandparents/aunt. (its a bit crowded) but I do plan to move out with only my family by the end of this year). basically we have been trying to move out....and save enough money to do it...we been living like this for the past 7 years so its like a big dream of ours to finally get a new home.
Basically he said he feels like he shouldn't be restricted to see me.
He just wants me to finish school.
I told him so you rather not be with me, then be with me and at least get to see me somewhat rather than nothing. And he said I am that selfish.
But he really wants to remain friends, I told him it will be hard for me. He said its difficult for him also. He can't stop thinking about me. But I mean I'm a cross between still being his friend or just not be involved with him no more..He wants to also know if there's that chance of after graduation and getting back together.
I feel like a guy who can't stand with me through this (which is really nothing, just college, difficult living arrangements) does not deserve to be with me at all. His selfishness will make him lose me........because he feels he is "entitled to it" (see me) sounds like a such a leo!
He can see me everyday for the rest of his life he we end up together. It is just for now that is how its going to be.
I told him, I go through a lot to be with him. I make time to see him, I put in a lot of effort. (when i was with him I try my best to stay over, and plan trips with him.)
What do you think?
Yeah, I couldn’t provide his birth time. =/
This is very interesting! Thanks for pulling it up and for your analysis!
“he is willing to give you more than you ever expects.” When we were together he did give a lot to me and I did not know how to take it because I guess I am not use to all the nice gestures.
“He, however, also has Jupiter conjuncts, which gives him a desire for social success, be it popularity or leadership, this enhances many of his Leo traits in terms of leadership and generosity. ”
This seems just like him!
Reading all this I can relate it to the way I am and he is. It’s crazy how similar it is.
I will keep you posted.