I'm going thru the same kind of thing, and so are alot of my friends. We are all in our early 30's too, with or without kids, married unmarried- crazy. i think it's reflected in our whole society nowadays, but that's a good thing.....maybe it means we're not being as shallow.
anyway, one of my best friends is army, and he is only now starting to laugh and get excited about his dreams again, and he's a year out of iraq. being military, i think you all are under even more pressure to get your goals accomplished, because you never know when they're gonna send you a letter and tell you to stop everything and go here now. he's also a guardsman. i think he really struggles with believing he deserves his dreams to come true, or fighting his cynicism that anything is really any good at all. be gentle with yourself while you are going thru all this; you should take care of yourself just as much as you take care of us!
what is helping me go thru some major life changes-everything all at once, in fact- is to recognize that i've got to remember what i'm truly passionate about, and what i really want to do in this life that i know i've always been good at. i have to stop being so modest- i'm the only one here who can do what i do, and it's my choice to do it or whine the rest of my life. i think if you really think about how to achieve your goals, in a way that is authentically yourself you'll start seeing opportunities and people that are absolutely what you need to get to the next step.
just remember once you start, keep telling yourself, well, i can't stop now, and i've got to keep plugging away no matter what happens. before you get everything up and running all the way, take a second and enjoy how you being yourself and positive and walking like you've got a right to be here too makes the people around you smile, too, and that's sometimes gonna be the best thing that gets done all day.
you know this better than anyone, being military......any day any of us wakes up is a good day, and we live to the best of our abilities to honor ourselves and those who are no longer with us.
hope this isn't too hokey, hope it helps, take care