Captain, such a vindictive flatmate (sorry, this is long)

  • Hi Captain, my boyfriend is currently sharing a flat with this scary woman who is jealous, manipulative and all things undesirable. The funny thing is, they used to be mates - until one month into them sharing the flat and he started going out with me. That was early this year.

    She is truly awful to live with (she slams the doors around alot) and my boyfriend is so sick of her antics. He can't get out of the house contract though he says - and that expires only in december. She uses my boyfriend's eating utensils and leaves them in the sink and not wash them, until my bf has to resort into keeping everything in his bedroom.

    A few months ago she knocked on his bedroom door (I was in it too) and started a confrontation with us. In short, she is not happy that he doesn't spend time with her and that I spend time over at the flat. She threw alot of accusations and made a lot of ridiculous accusations, insinuating that a couple does not have to spend that much time together. After that, she actually resorted to really low tricks, like locking him out of the house (3 times in 2 weeks) and then pretending it was an accident. I suspect that she came into the room and destroyed the personalised photoframe that I made for my bf with our pic (can you tell me if she did that? Our hunches did). She then refused to pay the electricity bill until my bf had to remind her numerous times (even then she didn't want to reply) and 'beg' for them to live amicably until the end of the lease.

    Just recently, we discovered a nasty pile of vomit left in my bf's water tub in the kitchen sink. It was done by her of course.

    Please Captain, can you provide some insight into the situation? I fear that she might do even crazier stuff to my poor bf, who has to lock his room everytime he goes out.

    Why is she the way she is, so mean and nasty and always creating drama for the people around her? Is she gonna do more evil stuff to us?

    Her initials is TC (not to be confused with mine which are the same) and she is born in 1976 (Dragon).

    Please let us know soon for peace of mind!!!!

    Thank you.

  • This woman is jealous of you, plain and simple. She wants your B/F's attention, though strangely she's not in love with him - just in lust. Yes, she is causing all the problems around the flat. She is mentally and emotionally unstable.

    Your boyfriend needs to get harsh with her - lay down the law that if she causes any more problems or doesn't pay her bills, she will get booted out or even turned over to the police for malicious damage or whatever. Can you and your boyfriend collect some tangible proof of her sabotage if you can? Photos, recordings, documentation of every incident, etc. in case of a legal problem. At least he only has to last until December when he can end the contract. But she definitely needs him to put her in her place. Niceness won't work with her.

  • Thanks Captain. We are really 'scared' of her, if that's the right word to use. We are treading on eggshells around the house all the time, preferring to avoid he if she's out in the living room area.

    I don't know if we're able to or in time to collect evidence - the vomit she left intentionally for us to clean up is gone as we washed the disgusting mess away immediately. The door catch that's left on intentionally to lock my bf out we didn't film it. The only remaining proof is the photoframe.

    I'm afraid and worried that there might be an epic nasty trick she performs before December. She really is mentally and emotionally unstable and we wouldn't put anything past her! She won't try to seduce my bf or anything, would she??? And you're right about the bit where my bf has to be harsh with her. The her-locking-him-out-of-the-flat incidents ended after he got so fed up that he yelled at her.

  • She is relying on her ability to frighten you. Stand up to her or she will always have her way.

    Try recording her tirades or getting her activities on your mobile phone camera. Even if you don't use the evidence, you can frighten her with it. She is a bully and you can't let her walk all over you. Your boyfriend must impose some limits and rules on her and enforce them.

    If you don't make a stand, she will get much much worse. Of course she will and has tried to seduce your boyfriend - so fight, darn it.

  • I feel really disturbed now.... 😞

    I just hope she doesn't attempt anything again from now until mid-november. My bf has told me he is planning to sneak off then instead of waiting till mid-december. I wanted to confront her a couple of months back when she keeps locking him out but my bf says it's best to keep the peace. She just keeps coming up with annoying new stunts.

    One more thing Captain - do you see her tampering with his food in the fridge? He can't keep stuff like milk/meat in his room so he still has to keep some stuff out in the kitchen where she would have access to them. Basically I appreciate your insight and you telling us what we can/should look out for from her!!

  • This woman will go as far as she wants to until someone stops her so your boyfriend's way of trying to avoid trouble may not work too well. He needs to put his foot down or she certainly will go further than she has been doing. He should warn her that if she continues to cause mischief he will have no choice but to call the police or the landlord.

  • Appreciate your kind help in this, Captain. I shall not be afraid of her anymore and will not hesitate to warn her if necessary!

    Thank you and have a very good day ahead!

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