Scorpio Broke up with me!

  • Hi All,

    I have a relationship question, and I want to get different perspectives. My Scorpio ex-boyfriend just broke up with me about 3 weeks ago. His reasons were many, but most obviously we didn't have time for each other, he said he just wasn't happy and didn't know why. He said he still loves me and has feelings for me but just doesn't see a relationship anymore, and isn't sure if in the future he could see us together. Now everyone in his family and I know he is going through a sort of depression. He has no idea where he wants to go and who he wants to be and is freaking out about it. He thinks I'm the reason he is unhappy, but everyone knows it's his life and the way it is that's making him unhappy-not the relationship. I've talked to different Scorpios and know they like to shut people out when going through this. I should also mention, he text me almost every single day since we broke up, just small chit chat, but I never text him, I'll just politely respond to his text and that's all. He broke up with me about 5 days before my birthday, but still bought me a $300.00 purse for my birthday. Does anyone have any insight or been through this before? Some people say he's done and he's just being nice and that's why he's texting and that I should shut him out completely. Others say when a Scorpio is done, they cut off all contact, so it's possible it's just a phase and he will come back someday. I'm wondering what advice you all would have for me. We both love eachother very much, care and trust eachother like no other. He did open up to me the other night about his life, and that he is so lost and is scared to try something and fail and I just felt bad for him. I want to help, but have no idea how, I just try to listen and support him. I'm also a virgo BTW. I guess I'm wondering if you guys think he's done with me and won't come back, or if it's possible for a future, I know it won't be for a long time from now if at all.

  • When Scorpios are done they are done. No gifts, no text--nothing. He has isolated himself. I'm very close to Scorpios. When they want to be alone there is no intruding. At times they can seem like a different person and if you know them well enough to trust their true nature you just have to step away until they decide to connect. That's why it's important for Scorpio mates to have a full life besides them as they get very claustraphobic at times and will back off when the feelings get too much. I pick up his issues are family related. His past is marked by power struggles and he is still finding his way around that as he developed an all or nothing defense stratigy that complicates his ability to balance a love relationship whithin his comfort zone. He has very high expectations of himself--most Scorpios do. He keeps his failures to himself--most Scorpios do. Here's the contradiction between you and him. It's a trust issue. Unfortunetly the moment he gives in and opens up to you--which is what he really wants to do--he later feels very vulnerable--this is his issue--and he cannot stand that feeling--it is very scary and Scorpios are protective of themselves anyway so this is like a double whammy. You may try seeing under the surface and although he's saying one thing you need to be more insightful with this one as he is not going to reveal himself so up front. He is confused himself. All he knows is he feels this fear. It's really about his inability to trust. You can't fix this overnight. You may find he is more complicated than you can adjust to. It will be your choice as I see you are more likely to end this relationship than him. Scorpios are not for the thin skinned or weak but they are worth the challange if you can learn to let go and just get busy with your own life when they have their moods. If they truelly love you--they are loyal to the max and always come back. Your Scorpio has decided he does love you or he'd be gone without a word. It really is true done is done for them. Some people fear their arguments and tempers most but really the kiss of death is their indifference. Be supportive but not too soft---Scorpios expect to be held accountable--they may grumble but they prefer a mate who has as much backbone as heart. I also pick up you should step back from his family for awhile--no Scorpio likes being analized openly and because his issues are from early family dynamics you are feeding the demon. It's best he not see you as part of his family right now. You don't want to be part of that fear he runs from. Do not even say to him what others agree with. He can't get past the trust issue unless you get that. Scorpios are very loyal in love and expect it from mates more than most. You may think it's harmless to share personal info with others but Scorpios draw a different line in that department. In fact if he knew about this post it would keep him away! Keep it between you and him untill he can grow past his childhood baggage. Seek advice if you must but keep it where he won't have to know. Stop discussing him with family and friends--this only keeps him fearful of not being safe. My intuition tells me has already expressed himself on this issue. BLESSINGS!

  • Thanks so much for your answer. I guess I should mention we've been together almost 2 years, and he did say while he was breaking up that he was so confused about everything and wasn't sure if it's the thing to do (break up) but that he felt he needed too do this. We also argued a lot in the past during our relationship and he said he can't let the past go and it keeps bugging him even though we haven't fought in months. I'm trying to give him space, and will definitely stop talking about it with everyone. A part of me feels like he will come back, though it may be months down the line, I just don't know if I'm being naive about it.

  • He'll come back because he hasn't really left. That's why I said it would be more likely for you to end it not him. He wouldn't take so much space if he believed for a moment he'd lose you. He's just confused and feels he can't cope but underneath that he knows you are still there. If you ignored him too long he would not be able to stand it. But with a Scorpio you can't play games on purpose--ignore him to just be in control BUT you can be honestly so busy with other things and people that it is an honest choice on your part to give him all the space he needs. Interesting you added that you've been together 2 years---I think you are pretty smart and already suspecting you've hit that place were you've been together long enough for one to forget or apreciate what they have---perhaps you've felt a bit taken for granted? The cure? Give him more space than he bargained for and perhaps he will not be so confused. My advice--when you do get together try not focusing on all him so much and for the next few weeks be very busy. Sometimes a man must see you from afar--out of his reach-- to really see you. Trust your intuitions--I sense you got this figured out better than you give yourself credit for. I definetly pick up that he loves you. BLESSINGS

  • Yea, I have a feeling we won't be talking as much anymore, we haven't talked in the last couple of days. He told me he loved me and still had feelings and all, but was confused. I guess I'm just nervous if we take weeks or months apart, he'll really get over me. Like, the longer we're apart the easier it'll be to move on. I guess if that happens, it just wasn't meant to be. Thanks again for responding! it was very helpful!

  • Believe me if it's love two weeks--two months--even two years will not erase that! I know it doesn't feel like it but you really do have the power--that's what scares him. He loves you. I would bet the rent. Do not be afraid to let go and give it the test. Pretend he's away on a far away island without a cell phone and just pick a project and stay busy. The minute he feels YOU let go of your fear the faster he will get unconfused. November will be a much better month for you and he will reveal himself in a way that will make more sense. BLESSINGS

  • If you don't mind me asking, how do you know about November? I'm just curious about astrology in general, do you study it? He also has never been in a relationship before, we are eachothers "first loves." Part of me feels like he is really over it, but there are certain things that he said that made me think. For one, I talked with his sister last week, and she said that I need to move on because he sounds more sure of his decision to break up, whereas at first he wasn't sure at all and now he's more certain. But then she asked him if he was happier and he said, "I dunno, I am but I'm not." That one line gives me some hope haha! I think he's more confused about life in general, I'm sure it was easy to blame the relationship. Anyway, I guess it's about patience on my end, but I am definitely planning some trips and different projects to stay busy!

  • I saw November as a psychic message but it may be in your planets as well--just heard spirit say it would be a good month for you as well as him though he may not start feeling it till mid month. I think you will feel a difference right off in Nov. Even as October closes.--and stop sharing with his family! Trust me on that one. If you do run into his family members do not talk about him--talk about yourself or change the subject fast if they insist. I sense just a tweak of interfearance there. Be careful you are not sabotaged and it also is not good for you to be drawn in. Good for you on staying busy--you won't regret it. BLESSINGS. PS--I see you starting something new--music related

  • Ooh interesting! I was thinking recently about picking my guitar back up! So November for our relationship...? Would we talk more then? Or get back together or you don't know specifics haha. The sabotage is interesting... Would you think it would be from his family or friends? Cause his friends don't really like our relationship and his sister thinks taking a very long break up is what will help us. I mainly want him to be happy again...

  • Just trust the warning---you can't trust sharing but don't dwell on it which is why spirit resists anymore details. Spirit just keeps insisting--stop talking about him. Talk only about yourself or the weather if you have to, as it defeats the purpose of this time to let go. Follw the guitar urge--definetly! Spirit says the guitar will take you to other surprises--good surprises. I see you hooking up with two other musicians. Start being more disciplined--play everyday. Again spirit is urging yes yes yes on the music.! BLESSINGS.

  • I guess the Virgo in me is trying to figure it out. I know he'll always be in my life, but I miss him and just want to figure out if we'll ever have a chance at a relationship again. So you're saying I have to let it go, to maybe get him back...?

  • Also, should I wait for him to contact me?

  • His sister and I are similar ages, and we have become good friends over the last 2 years. Is it alright to stay friends with her as long as I don't mention him at all, I was going to visit her in Texas at the end of October. Also, do you mean that November will be good for us individually, or as a couple?

  • November will be good for both of you and you will each see each other more clearly. If you follow this intuition right now and advice to get busy and let go of "needing" to know he is yours you will get your reward as October ends. You two are still connected and he will follow YOUR lead which is how it effects both of you. By the end of October you should be fine with talking to that sister but by then hopefully you will be mostly filled with excitement about your own interests. Just avoid any sad talk or dwelling too much on all about him. Right now and for the next three weeks letting go is important. And yes--letting go will attract him back--but I hesitate telling you that because it dimminishes your inner power if you keep thinking on that or dwelling on it. The real personal growth comes from you doing the right thing for you without any garatees. But you are a smart girl---if a loved one asked you the same advice what do you see and advise? When a man says he's confused and needs space--a wise woman gives him ALL the space he needs. You are so connected on YOUR end he can't really know how it is without you. All couples get too used to each other now and then. Let him go--let him call. If he does call instead of focusing on him--how he's feeling--how's the relationship doing. Instead of talking about that just share all about you and your honest latest projects and everyday life. He needs to remember who you are--without him and why he first decided he had to have you. I see him following your lead if you do this and by mid November he will suddenly be more focused and goal orientated. What you can tell his sister is "you love him dearly but I can't make him feel the same if he doesn't. And actually this free time has really given you a new energy to get back to some of your interests you were once passionate about but kinda let slip away as you got too caught up into making this relationship work"

  • wow, yes a lot of this were things I was thinking I need to do, but I also just felt hopeless getting back together,and didn't trust my own intuition. Well thank you so much for taking time out to talk to me. It's been very eye-opening, I'll let you know how it all plays out! Thanks again!

  • tes when we want to be alone , we want to be alone...NOW...scorpios r the #1 sigh for depression but...he might not be depressed just unhappy where he is at right now..Yes u have to let go to get him back..allow him the time to decide that " he loves u.and he wants to be with you:..I am a scorp and ,my love interest is a glad u dont have one of them!!!!>>>>im so lost but im a scorpio and i know ima always be good,,sad that i cant have him but happy" that he is happy"...

  • yes cause family knows him and to know personal stuff about him ..the family will throw it in his face and make him feel even more isolated..then he will think" he cant trust u cause these r things that should be kept secret"..

  • Hey Blmoon,

    I'm not sure if you're still around, or remember me, but I need some insight if so! First, hope you are doing well, and all is good with you. This is continuing from the last time we talked, so I took your advice, and stopped talking to my ex, and only spoke to his sister a few times over the month of October, but all we talked about was me, I never brought my ex up and when she did I changed the subject. I haven't talked to my ex since late September, and only said Happy Birthday to him on Oct 26, and then a few days ago, he had charged something to my amazon account, so i spoke with him very briefly about that, just a few texts and turns out it was an accident and he canceled it-that was it. We haven't made an effort to reach out to each other at all. Now, here's where I messed up. I'm planning to drive back with his sister from Texas in December. I called her yesterday to talk about it, and she said, she talked to her brother(my ex) and he said he doesn't want her and I being friends. She thinks he's just in that jealous phase, and she said " I know my brother, and he still cares and doesn't want to hear about us going out, or you dating or any mention of a guy, otherwise he wouldn't be trying to cut you out of every part of his life." She says it'll pass, but for the next couple of months, I need to lay low, or it'll be the end of us ever even being friends. She also said that she's been telling him he's not going to find another girl like me for a long long time, if ever, and that he admitted that too. Basically, she said the relationship part is over, he's over and done with it , but that he's not over me and that'll just take time. She also said I do need to give him time now, and you never know what the could hapen in the future. She hasn't told him that we talk, just quick convos, and all I said is if he's over it, why does he care if we're friends. She also mentioned he's still really unhappy. Meanwhile, I did take your advice and got busy with my life. I have been happier, much happier than the last time we talked. I know over time I'll get over him and move on. I'm actually really at the point where I don't know if I truly want him back or just miss having someone there. Any insight to any of this? I also saw on his facebook that he;s been hanging out with this girl, its his sisters friend, and I'm 90% positive they are just friends and nothing more, but you never know. Lastly, she did mention that, pretty much the main reason he ended it was because I took this bartending job. It was something that I had wanted to do forever, and he was sooo against it. So for the most part of our relationship I stopped looking for one, but then at the end of August, one kinda fell in my lap, and I took it, and she says that was kinda like me ending the relationship cause he told her that he told me we would break up if I ever did get one. I don't remember this, I just thought he was uncomfortable with it, but at the same time I felt like I had to do it, just to get it out of my system, because it's something I wanted to do for so long, I've since quit, not for me. Any advice would be much appreciated, I know you mentioned that nov would be good for us, and mid nov for him, but I feel like he hates me, and there really is no hope for a relationship anymore at all. It definitely feels like he is done and moving on, and I don't really feel like I need to know he is mine anymore, I've let that go, but I am wondering if I should move on or if you see anything in the future for us.

  • I should also mention that she thinks I should make the effort to contact him and be friends, because he won't. I told her I don't want to, because I want to give him space and he'll contact me if he wants to, but she says he won't because he's use to turning his back on people and never looking back. I don't want to feel like I'm bugging him, or have him think I'm trying to get back together with him by being friends. But just the fact that he doesn't want me to be friends, is a red flag. You were completely right about the family interference, I think this is what you were talking about. His sister also mentioned that he knows I have the power and can end my friendship with her and be done with it all, but I'm not. I know you mentioned that earlier too, that me having the power scares him. But according to her, he is done done with the relationship, and he's too busy to miss me. He just is trying to get over me and that's why he doesn't want me and her to be friends. I'm so sorry this is so long, but all this kinda happened in the last 2 days, and it's bugging me mainly because I'm PMSing as well haha, because before this I was totally fine, and I'm feeling the downward spiral again.

  • I don't come on here anymore unless spirit asks so here I am and you deserve an update since you did follow spirits advice to your higher good. First, the attraction is not the problem--you two have a great connection BUT the lesson is that it isn't always enough and you must always use your HEAD as well so not to be blinded by love. It's about his issues with being vulnerable--he feels the attraction--does feel love but he has issues that cannot support the relationship. So, he kind of forces his partner to be there for HIM--loyal and true all the while he always has one foot out the door--just in case--he needs to run. He is very insecure and insecure people handle that by becoming control freaks. They are not even aware of it unless they truelly decide to change. They will keep their fears of not trusting others alive by setting up rules that of course will get broken and then they say to their dark side--see, just as I thought--they can't be trusted--they will betray me! You had been with him long enough to know this feeling of "jumping through hoops" with him. As it stands he's not sure what to make of your changes--you did change and he's not sure as you rose above him so he can't understand that yet. If he did or could he could possibly decide to really look at himself and how he sabotages his relationships. You have thrown him for a loop yet still his ego refuses to actually talk to you honestly about it. On a insecure day he tells himself someone else interfeared and changed your mind--he imagines a paranoid interfearence by his sister. He's testing the waters when he gives you--rules--conditions to follow. He only lets in a woman who will agree to that. He has to acept you as you are and you can not let him make you feel bad about your life choices. Also, spirit says the amazon mistake was no mistake but his way of getting your attention without letting down his ego sheild. Here's what you must remember. YES THE ATTRACTION IS STRONG but he has real issues and must be in control. He has not changed and if you relent without keeping the issues in the open it will go back to the same past and you will not be happy--you will be giving away your power and all your life desicions will be filtered through "him" and what he wants. He must rise to meet you--you deserve that as you love unconditionaly and are loyal. He is attracted to the most loyal as that is were he rules them--by making them think they are disloyal when he sets his rules of proof. Scorpios are the masters! They can use it good or bad depending on their own insecurities. It is November and it will come to a head --he must come to you--in an honest vulnerable way so you can tell him the truth of why you have been able to go on with your life. It may help for you to write it all down in a letter to yourself so you are clear about knowing what is wrong with the relationship. You have to be secure in your power--believe in your choices because when he gets close he will talk you out of it--he's very good at it. Bottom line is you do not have to prove your love and he has to accept that love is being vulnerable and we all have to trust or not. If you are going to cheat--if he is going to cheat it doesn't matter where you work. Also, you have to have room to make your own mistakes. If you don't do something just because he said no but don't get why it means nothing as you didn't learn anything about yourself. You are young and must try and move on a lot before being more secure with who you are. He hs to shorten the leash or hold you back. He is unsure of how to interpet your ability to love him yet make the choice to let him go--in his insecure world love is all or nothing--this is the great divide between you two. As far as the relationship with his sister you must be honest with yourself about that--if he didn't exhist would you and her still be close? If yes than enjoy. The real answer you are looking for is ego based--his inability to be vulnerable is HIS problem--HE MUST COME TO YOU! You have raised the bar and now he must rise to meet you--or nothing will change. Do you really see yourself happy "the way it was?" BLESSINGS PS--this is a great time for change this month--it can be a start but you can't go back to old habits. If he does not rise to meet you YOU WILL MEET A MAN WHO WILL! It is the law of attraction.

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