NEED HELP with this cancer woman before she drives me insane



  • I still have love for her inside, and she left me twice with another man, she says she doesnt love him thats why she still calls me and tells me that she loves me and shes thinking about getting back with me, but living in different houses. I am so confuse about her that i just dont know what to do my heart says yes, but my mind is telling me what if she leaves me again after 1, 2, or 3 months. Pls a simple reading some one to let me know if i should go or if i should stay tx.



  • Piscesman, it hurts, doesn't it? And it's going to keep on hurting until you realize you are rock bottom. If you are letting someone play with your heart like this, it isn't easy seeing the bigger picture. My advice is to have her stop going back between the two of you. Don't give her an ultimatum. Simply chose not to play the game anymore. Focus on what is working for you in life at this moment. If she wants to live in a different house, then that tells me love isn't the issue, it's trust. Listen to what your mind has to say. In a society loaded up on "let your heart lead the way," we hardly give our thoughts a chance way before we ever react.



  • Thank you espearite u helped me there. I just cant let her play with my heart like that. I have to respect my self much much better so i can find my self instead of going back to her. tx a lot.



  • Espearite>>>>In a society loaded up on "let your heart lead the way," we hardly give our thoughts a chance way before we ever react.

    sunny>>>> I agree that it's important to balance the heart and mind. our minds is just as important as our hearts. often times we are misled by the heart, and yet the mind was screaming to stop this now!

    remember an old song? can't recall who was the vocal artist... "she drives me crazy!"

    women are more complicated than a man.

    sunny



  • oops

    women are more complicated than "men"



  • lol tx also ms Sunny and by the way the name of the group was fine young carnivors from the U.K. i believe.



  • I agree Ms. Sunny. I think wisdom can help one use both mind and heart in making the right choice. Emotions are not easy things and love is something a lot of people tend to tread lightly, or in a sort of black and white sort of way. When one is faced with a choice of attraction, friendship can be the best course of action instead of pursuing a relationship.

    Piscesman: I used to get caught up in the triangle thing, everyone does. Move away from this. Enjoy your life, even if you're still single. Would you rather spend it miserable and single? It's not easy to move forward, but when you begin to find joy in the little things and those around you, it becomes easier. In time, you will find someone and the past will be a memory of who you once were.



  • Hi all, I am new to this this, but have been following these sites for a long time and finally decided to join in. My sanity has been saved over and over thanks to everyone here. I myself am going through confusion with Cancer guy, but also have a good understanding how they operate and knowing some of the traits if this is what I really want.

    Can someone please give me their opinion on this matter.

    After a long wait for Cancerian man, he pursues me, for dinner and drinks, after a few more dates he asks me to join him on a cruise to celebrate his birthday. (a couple of his family members went along as well). My 2 girls spent the summer with their dad in another state, so I was alone for the summer. Things seemed to go well, slowly but that was okay, I liked that too. I went on doing my own things, not waiting around for him. I would hear from him almost everyday, text or phone. One day out on a drive, He did tell me he didn't want commitment that was about 6 weeks into the dating thing and in conversation said he may find me the love of my life. I was stunned by this comment, and did not answer to him. Later when he was in a good mood, I told him I felt hurt by that comment ,and he said I misunderstood him, he told me, what he was saying is, maybe he is the love of my life or I will find someone else while I was with him? Things went on as normal. My girls came back from being with their dad, the next day, I had to have a minor surgery, while I was recovering at the surgery place I get a text from Cancer man saying how you doing? Saw your exs van outside your place as I drove into town. My ex was saying goodbye to the girls thats all. After this incident, he would not answer my call, or text. I let it be, knowing he needed to cool of, I sent a text 2 days after, (he wasn't going to answer the phone, I had no choice), I told him basically in a gentle way, I know something has hurt you and when you are ready to talk about it let me know. 2 weeks later, nothing from him, so I thought I would send him a brief text, just thinking about you and if you are doing okay. The next morning I get a text from him, he says, apologize for no communication, no excuse, still working away, will need to visit when I get back. Still no word from him. Its almost a month.

    Was the commitment thing a red flag? Was i just summer company for him? Why take me on a cruise? Was he developing feelings for me then backed off, but why do this just as my girls get back home. I am just getting on with my life, I do miss him but @ the same time wish i knew what his intentions are. I have known him for a couple of years prior, our girls go to school together and are friends. I did send him one last email again very brief (3 lines) and did say his friendship is very important to me. I have done enough on my part now, no more contact from me. I do really like him, even though he has some personal issues, it was more about the emotional connection with him that I liked. Hope I explained this okay.

    Please, if anyone can tell me what they think of this situation, I would be grateful.



  • piscesstar

    your cancer man is very insecure.

    this one has a tendency to duck and weave. he tends to overreact to just about everything.

    good luck with this one..

    Sunny



  • Sunny,

    Thanks for your reply. Yes, you are so right! LOL

    I heard that straight from the crab's mouth, he told me right out he is very insecure and emotional.

    I am not looking at changing him, (one thing I learnt from my past with an Aries man , you can't change who they are),

    Right now, its not in my hands as which direction things are heading, and to be honest with you, I don't know what to do?

    On another note, I found 31 Love Heart Shape rocks in my garden in the last few weeks, maybe someone is trying to tell me something!!

    Thanks again, I am glad it was you who replied, there is something about your honesty and thats what i am looking for!



  • OMG! I collect heart shape rocks whenever I go for walks in parks or farm fields. and then I put them in my garden. that is so cool..

    I think it means you have a loving heart, open, and honest. and that you are surrounded by love. not just from that cancer guy, but you have wonderful friends who care for you more than you know. even in spirit, your angels and guides are looking out for you and guiding you to your next love.

    I doubt if you will be single much longer... probably in about a year or so. definitely you will find a good man.

    I don't think cancer guy is ready to depart from your life. he is very afraid you will reject him. the competition can be too much for him. so... he would rather go in hiding,and until he gathers strength to face up to his demons and overcome his fear and lack of trust. can take years with this guy. lol

    wishing you magic.. Sunny