PLEASE help me understand Aquarians.....

  • You have described most aquarians I know and yes I too am drawn to them more than other signs as you can tell from my name. A good way to sum up a relationship with them is remember tea parties when you were little, it was you and a doll or a few of them. You did most of it but it seemed they really participated....same with aquarians. When you stop having tea, you really miss them too and you just don't have a clue why as you did all the work. None the less, you still crave their interaction. They are not verbal and they do not let on to have feelings until you part ways then you will hear how much they cared and valued you. Acceptance is not seeing with the eyes, its in the heart....that quote was written about aquarians in my opinion. Accept them as they are, love them and enjoy life to its fullest. They want you in their life as much as you do them or they would find a way to avoid you.

  • jjgurlz -- wow! even at 70, she is still true to form! Too funny. It is hard for me to imagine a mother being "unapproachable" as it seems like a fundamental contrast to what a mother should be......but I am so glad you had a nurturing Cancer for a father. (I have a cancer son...who is studying to be a doctor...typical cancer. lol)

    LibrasLair - are completely right. My friend does not like to make waves but rather blend in to the background and avoid attention on him. It is amusing how he likes to shock people or even annoy them sometimes just for entertainment ..but kinda likes to start the trouble and watch it from a distance instead of being in the drama. As an aries, of course, this is so foreign to me, as I want to be in the middle of everything........ because where else is there but the center of attention!! : D lol

    Also, you were completely on target with the comment about how they tend to work just enough to sustain their lifestyle.......he has always been precisely that way! (I think he is trying to change that lately, but it used to always be true of him) It is funny because you said they aren't materialistic. My friend seems content and definately not living his life for the almighty dollar, yet "being rich" is a major fantasy for him. I once asked him, "So would you rather fall desperately in love or win the lottery?" He said, "I think win the lottery because than I could buy whatever I wanted to make me happy." Of course I said, "That is just proof positive that you have never fallen in love or you couldn't say that!" He nodded his head. Too funny!

    Glad to know that I am not the only one who has had to learn not to expect others to be like me!


    theyallendupbeingaquatrians-- Your tea party analogy was just perfect!!!! That is a great synapsis of what it is truly like. I love it! We do everything, they sit there....... but yet life is incomplete without their presence!!

    I have only ever had interaction with this one aquarian on a friendship basis, so I am most curious about how they are in romantic relationships? Obviously if you tend to date aquarians, I imagine that they are able to become emotional attached when they choose to? I worry that he will never let himself "completely go" and fall inlove and let someone into his world as he would need to. He assures me he will be able to, and now that I am learning about Aquarians, I am worried less about it. I have to remember that many people live full and complete lives solo, even though that has not been my experience at all. : ) Thanks, my friend--- I do appreciate it immensely.

  • Hi,

    I think you are trying too hard and this is hurting you. You need to distance yourself from his man, the situation is draining you. Whilst you have a lovely husband you need to ask yourself why are you pursuing this friendship? If it is making you unhappy then let it go, if you have exhausted every avenue. I am a cancerian married to an aquarian. I have quite a bit of gemini in my birth chart. My brother is an aquarian and grandmother was an aquarian and one of the things I know about them is that they are very loyal and feel intense love for the ones they love. My husband is the most caring, loving man i have ever met but he is also incredibly awkward and difficult. The thing that is always ok is that I know he loves me. In that way he is very uncomplicated.

    As regards your friendship, it may be a case of taking a good look at him. Don't consider the star sign thing at all. Just look at him as a person. He is probably enjoying the flattery but may be unable to form close relationships. Maybe he has been hurt in the past and cannot get close to anyone. Try not to torture yourself anymore. Life is too short and whilst you are investing all your energy into this empty space you could be developing your own life in a much more enriching way. You are an aries with lots of strong positive qualities. You should not let these feelings undermine you. Find your inner strength, get proud and don't waste any more of your energy into what sounds like a road to nowhere. It may be that if you stand back, he may actually start responding more positively towards you. He may of course keep his distance as he is aware of your status as married. Unless you change the way that you approach him, nothing will change.

    Please don't consider me insensitive, this man sounds like he is driving you crazy You need to stop controlling the situation and take more care of yourself. If he is not returning your love then why hang around. It's been too long.

    I wish you all the best

  • Thanks Helle1--

    You are right in many ways that I have to learn where I can help people and where I cannot. I have left it bother it more than I ever should have... but in a way that was partially my own fault for expecting too much. I am not a quitter and I do enjoy a challenge, but this has been a little different thing for me. My friend has become more open to others, and is more comfortable in social circumstances now than he used to be, it would seem to me. I like to believe that I have helped him to know he can trust people, and that is very important to me. You are right though that I can't let it draw me down. I think I will be able to be friends with him now without needing validation or expecting too much, because of what I have learned from this forum. If this relationship proves to frustrate me more than I am able to enjoy it, then I know you are right and I should back away...... but I am hopeful that it will not be necessary. I have such a strength and a blessing in my husband and children, that I tend to think I can give to others endlessly without it draining me...but of course, I cannot. After all it is a friendship, of which I have many, and I need to not try so hard...... and just let it be one of the many facets of my life. I am far too controlling and feel too responsible for others. Thanks. Yes, I am an Aries and I much prefer to be strong and confident-- than doubting my worth! I am so spoiled and have never had a close relationship with anyone that wasn't highly emotional and sensitive as I tend to be, and it kinda through me for a loop and I took it personal. NO MORE OF THAT! LOL

  • I’m new to this forum and have been following this post with interest, mainly because I lived with my ex, who is an Aquarian, for 20 years. So I had an inside view! Also my brother is Aquarius, Sun and Moon, and I have many Aquarian friends. I think I have Aquarius Karma!

    First I just wanted to point out a difference between the independence of Aquarius and Aries. Aquarius can stand alone because it is the sign of the Rebel. And a Rebel has to stand alone. A Rebel has to be able to be a voice in the wilderness and make a stand even if the crowd is against him. This is a strength in Aquarius. Aries’ job on the other hand, is to lead the way. They stand out in front, but not alone. Indeed what good is a Ram without a flock of ‘sheep’ to lead? So Aries needs to be able to pull the flock together and take charge, but that is very different from standing alone. Aquarius needs to be able to leave the flock if, in his opinion, the flock is going the wrong way.

    I could go on at length about Aquarians this or that, but my first love is Soul Astrology and I have to say that in just looking at our sun signs we are missing most of the picture. Not all Aquarians are alike, they (and us) are unique, and what makes us so is the ‘recipie’, the blend of energies in our individual charts, and the chemistry between our own energies and the energies of the other. And we are unique for a reason, because we all have a very specific and important job to do, in our spiritual journey.

    We can’t know and honour our uniqueness without knowing the full picture of our chart, for that is our ‘energetic blueprint’. For example who do we become under stress? Who do we become in relationship to others? That is indicated more by the qualities of our moon signs, than our sun signs. And later in life, probably from our mid 30’s onwards, we are called more towards our rising sign – which indicates our soul’s journey.

    The challenges of our sun sign (expressed personality) are there to serve us, and others, by calling us up to a higher vibration into our soul path. They exist to raise our awareness and develop soul-consciousness.

    Aquarians aren’t rebellious just because they want to be difficult, but because their job is to rebel – but to rebel with awareness. Anything else is just serving the ego. For example if an unenlightened Aries ram was just about to lead his flock off the face of a cliff, it is Aquarius’ job to stand up and shout “STOP”. The Rebel. Likewise, if an unenlightened Aquarian has become too isolated and fixed in his limiting ideas ( as the fixed air sign Aquarians can be prone to fixed, limited, opinions / ideas), it is Aries’ job to ‘butt’ him up the butt and shout “WAKE UP”.

    If you are doing too much butting and prodding Aries, check in. You may have become caught in your own ego-trap of believing your own ideas about what is best for others. Take another look. Real-life Rams rarely charge and butt. They lead the flock by example and inspiration. These are your true strengths when you learn to apply them with wisdom.

    The trick is to know our own motivation. Are we really being motivated by our higher self for the benefit of all? or are we just meeting our own lower egoic needs? Truth is, it’s usually a bit of both. In striving to help others we do usually feed our own ego a little along the way. So in rebelling, Aquarians, you need to ask yourself : am I really doing this for the higher Aquarian vibration of serving humanity? And in prodding, and ‘butting’ people Aries, you also need to check in and ask: Am I really doing this for the higher Arian vibration of uplifting and inspiring others?

    And as for me? In being Gemini (the messenger), am I really serving the highest Gemini vibration of sharing quality, helpful, information, with unconditional love? or am I just falling into my lower egoic Gemini trap of being a know-it-all (again!!!). Yes, it’s probably a bit of both!

    Give yourself (and him) the space to be who you are, and honour your uniqueness in your souls' journey.


    I can't say I understand it all, as I have no clue what sun sign, rising, etc. means. I am a novice here but I do see what you are saying and the comparison of what Aries,Aquarius, and gemini's "Jobs" are within the scheme of things. It is most intresting. How do I learn more about this and find out what the "job" is for each sign?

    You are right. I always lead the flock...but I need to have a flock to lead. : ) (PS> I have seven children, so I literally have a "flock"! lol)

  • Hi,

    I read your post and got many insights to share.

    You sound like a modern woman, and in love with love. Sometimes (I have Venus in Aries,) we need more love than anyone deserves. Your husband must be a saint, and this kid obviously does not want to get involved. It is hard to decipher whether you are monogamous. I get the idea you have a more open marriage, though it is not a judgment. It just seems that you give to others whether they want it or not, and perhaps at the expense of your husband.

    Since I am only a quadruple Taurus, my Venus is a third of my chart. I can tell you that having Venus in Aries is a curse. The only exception is to channel that energy (Aries) into making money. Who doesn’t need money? Aries does best flittering around, while Aquarius is more fixed and solid intellect...not flighty or indecisive as their air partners Gemini and Libra.

    You give up a lot of power chasing others to be your friend. Realize that only one out of three people are even going to be on your wavelength. We are really married to our work, as your husband found out. It almost seems that you are not quite in touch or truly fulfilled in your life mission. It is your service to others that leads to culture being learned and not inherited each generation anew. Real intimacy comes from enlightenment; like if a person was deaf, dumb and blind, how would they find knowledge, wisdom, truth and freedom? Find all you need within and act like an Aries that is self confident and not needy. Your ability to find ennobling work will help you come across as more detached, enchanting and alluring. You be the magnet that pulls or attracts what you want in the field of non chalance. See how much more effective it is.



  • UrantiaJim--

    LOL!!! I guess I came across way wrong! Yes, I was a free-spirit that was hard to tame in my youth, and I still have an adventurous spirit but I most definately have a very old-fashioned monogomous marriage! Actually I have been with him since I was 12 years old, dated 8 years, was still a virgin when I married him, and we have both been completely faithful ever since. I don't know what I said to give the wrong impression....sorry.

    My husband is the most amazing man in this world, in my opinion...... but I wouldn't say "he doesn't want to get involved." It is more accurate to say that he doesn't ever feel the need to get involved in this or any other friendship that I may have because he knows me and trusts me implicitly. That is all soap operas here...I'll let that for TV! lol My husband is my first priority and he knows that and he loves that I am the kind of person who always looks to help or care about others. (We have taken in 57 foster kids over the years and adopted some of them)

    I am a very strong woman....... but I do tend to be needier at times than I wish...which is more the result of an abusive childhood than anything else. Because of what I have been thru, I tend to want to nurture everything around me. I stopped my medical career because I couldn't stand not being able to bring home every child who was abandoned there. That is me. I like that I care more than most, and I make no apologies for that.... but I accept that I will be hurt often because of it...which is fine. I am not looking for ways to attract or allure, just simply to better understand a friend that is much different than me, who I know values my friendship whether it is his nature to express that sentiment or not. Thanks for your opinion; however, it couldn't be farther from the truth. Maybe you could use some introspection of your own to find the reason you need to jump to such conclusions about others? hmmmm?

  • UrantiaJim I am sorry to hear you use the phrase "deaf,dumb and blind" everyone knows you can be deaf,mute and blind not DUMB.

  • You an tell I don't log in here very often - Better late than never tho! You can get your birth (natal) chart done here on try a free sample! will tell you what your sun, moon and rising sign are... your moon sign is the sign of emotion and relationship: how you relate to others, and your emotional self, and your rising sign is your Soul Sign.

    Once you have that information a web search on Soul Astrology will tell you much about your Soul Sign.

    Check out

  • sinnod,you are right on the money i too am an aquarian,and some people just don't know what to think some times.I am a atypical aquarian,and the stars are mostly leading my life(meaning they are right on.)my big problem is , when Iam in a relationship and I know it just isn't working ,I don't know how to get out of it. so I let it drive me crazy. right now he's a scorpio,and that is just alot of clashing going on. I don't want to be the one that does the hurting,I would rather hurt instead. kinda strange I know, but Iam a very caring person and the thought of hurting someone is so awfull for me.

    may the stars be on you side

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