ASCLAC part 4
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Hey all. I am Soooooo lost..lol... Ok so I am going to just post a bit and then you all can fill me in as you go because there is NO way I can go back and catch up at this point.
Me- things are better. House mess over. Scorp mess over. I don't know if we are freinds or not. I hope we are... but I have no idea.
Kel- I agree 100% about what you said about men in control. Those who are in control in "real life" have a desire to be controlled... those who are not in control of thier "real life" like work, home, whatever they WANT control. They usally want to play rough too....lol... just IMHO.
SV- I am lost.
Lua- fill me in Crab wants you to meet him on his vacation???
Katie- Catch up with you via here or mail.
Cusp, taurus I am so lost sorry.
What happened to adventure, lolpet, shorty, OL??? ...lol...
Oh, and PLEASE Jen-Jen no more commericals.... I'm behind enough as it is...lol...
Moon- Yes, crab had been talking about coming here to visit me on his vacation for over a year now, and last year when he took vacation he went to Brazil and Los Angeles for a few days to visit his friend, he didn't have time to come here but I went to HK instead. Before I went to HK he said he was still coming on his next vacation. In HK he was all confused and depressed and needed space, and he said he wasn't going to come here..
When I talked to him a few weeks ago it was like he was his old self, asking me to come to Manila again, joking with me etc..and last night he mentioned that he asked for vacation in the end of November because his friend in Brazil is getting married and wants him to be the best man, but he wants to come here for 3 or 4 days too but they might tell him last minute like they did last April..but he doesn't say anything like he wants to come here because he wants to see me, he's still indirect, he saids he wants to come here to go Scuba diving. If it was only Scuba diving there are other places to go directly from HK like Philippines, Malaysia or Thailand.
I don't get him, for me it has been 5 months and my feelings have changed, but he sounds like the same guy before he went through his "crisis" in April and May. It's hard to bring this up over the phone on skype, sometimes we don't get a good connection. It's like he is stuck in his feelings and where he is at and doesn't consider the feelings of others, his emotional world is the only one that exists for him...I mean even the 13 years, he expected me to remember exactly what happened 13 years ago, so 5 months must seem like nothing to him..
All 3 guys from my online dating has been silent. Maybe they all lost interest..oh well...NEXT!! I'm not going to waste time with men who aren't into me.
Cusp-I am having a difficult time following your story. I think I kind of skimmed over it. Can you give me a short summary? You are with a Scorp ? You are engaged to him but he wants to meet other women and go to strip clubs? Not following...
When a guy you had a couple of dates with saids "I'm busy with work this week" is he really busy with work or is he trying to tell you that he's not into you?
I got the feeling he was trying to 'make up for lost time' since we got engaged last December, and wasn't able to be upfront about that, due to the sudden influx of all these new women...I had to text him about that issue this morning because when we go to an event with lots of people, I almost feel like I might as well not 'be there'...and we were going to a workshop tonight for couples of all things!
(Nothing seems to deter this guy <lol>!!)
Well, his text basically told me that since he was 'no longer scared of women' (his original problem when we first met in 2007), he was enjoying the experience of meeting women again...and then sort of 'blew up' via text that left me with the impression he resented my concern about those women being attractive as well. His comments before that were like "Guys find you attractive, so if women find me attractive, why can't I enjoy that too?"
I got two e-mails that said the workshop now was charging money for the event, so we had to cancel that outing.
Since then, I have been trying to get clarification on that text outburst, to make sure I am not 'agreeing' with a way of socializing that seems to assume I 'welcome' being hit on; I had to text that I didn't 'need' such approaches since I was already happy with what I had with him, and that I set boundaries if these guys didn't 'get that'. I would hope he would do likewise!!</lol>
Thanks for the birthdates info; more than happy to help with this!!
I see what you mean about the Jen-Jen "commercials"...so I will say to that person: "Hey, lady, why not offer your services for free? It's a recession, and people here deserve better than these solicitations!"
hey all, just checking in. I was out all day yesterday for an all-day seminar. awesome speakers! so motivational!
moving this weekend, so I'll not be able to catch up at night for a while(a week). gonna keep popping in periodically and saying hi!
Gem and I had some deep convo. last night.
Pisces and I are still kind of on the rocks. :-/....I text him because we hadn't talked all day...
Me: "just wanted to say hi"
Pisces: "hey babe...I miss you alot"
MOON !! So glad you are back. Ok ..my crab J & I are doing great. I find my bio dad after 42 years.
After finding my bio dad, i was pretty much turned upside down. We have been talking on the phone, we have agreed to meet. It has been amazing really. After all these years.
Q for you .....are you writing ??
Cusp thanks ! I am curious to see what comes up.
I met a Pisces onlne..I have no experience with a Pisces male..my mother is a Pisces and she's a nutcase sometimes..my mentor teacher marine biologist friend was a Pisces and he commited suicide..
This Pisces loves the water, into sailing, watersports, outdoorsy..sounds like fun..very cute...
So what's a Pisces like?
I'm a bit cautious about water signs...
SV-so what was the deep convo with Gemini? You don't want Pisces to miss you?
Still no word from the Romanian Gemini or the pilot...reminds me of my life before crab..I go on one or two dates and either I lose interest or the ones I'm interested in never call back...
SV - UGH is right !! Why can't men just put it out there once. Do they really think we are that weak that we cannot handle it ? I mean if you really like and enjoy someone, or miss them...then why not do something about it !!
And, if it all boils down to is some kind of game, at least have the guts to be upfront and honest, cause maybe, just maybe we women are sick and tired of male games !! And they say WE are the weird ones ! HUH !
LUA - I think the majority of people are just insecure. No one likes rejection. That is why my heart was over the moon when my bio dad did call me and say he did want to get to know me. I really do not think I could have handled further rejection. I am sure I would have made it, but it would have been tough.
Lua>>I met a Pisces onlne..I have no experience with a Pisces male..my mother is a Pisces and she's a nutcase sometimes..my mentor teacher marine biologist friend was a Pisces and he commited suicide..
This Pisces loves the water, into sailing, watersports, outdoorsy..sounds like fun..very cute...
SV>>my Pisces loooooooooooves the water also. He grew up in Cali on Long Beach and loves surfing and stuff like that. He also likes snowboarding and soccer. Very active person. he’s quiet but funny. He really does make me feel special when I’m around him or with him. the problem I have is when I’m NOT around or with him. he doesn’t communicate. There’s barely a “hello”. That’s why I said “ugh” earlier. Because I told him I’m confused by him and his intentions and he said “well I like you and you know that but I don’t know what else to tell you if you’re still confused. I only give what I get”...it’s just very difficult to communicate with someone I only see maybe once a week. And when we DO go out we’re either with a group of friends or we’re at a baseball/football/basketball game so we just haven’t had the chance to get very deep with eachother. For me, that’s important. He opened up a couple of times and I wanted to do the same, but my fear came through so I backed down. He told me it takes time, but I’m at a point where I probably need to decide who I want to be with between him and Gemini.
Lua>>so what was the deep convo with Gemini? You don't want Pisces to miss you?
SV>>me and Gem seem to gel better together. I’m able to tell him about my fears and goals and what is going on within me. I’m still cautious but I’m more comfortable tell him things. Yesterday, we talked about him. he posted an article on FB about artists and how they are truly one of a kind people and that even though they have friends, they are lonely and they sometimes go down the wrong road in hopes of “finding” themselves. So I talked to him about it and asked him if that’s the way he felt, and he said he did a lot of the time. it’s going to be difficult with him and connecting with him, but I feel like my heart beats a little more for him than it does for Pisces. The fact that he’s an artist makes him very attractive to me. he’s deep and he has a different kind of love and perspective for things that a lot of people don’t.
Lua>>Still no word from the Romanian Gemini or the pilot...reminds me of my life before crab..I go on one or two dates and either I lose interest or the ones I'm interested in never call back...
SV>>how long has it been since the Romanian Gem guy contacted you? when are you meeting crab? Did I see somewhere that he’s going to take a few days of vacay to spend with you??
Taurus>>UGH is right !! Why can't men just put it out there once. Do they really think we are that weak that we cannot handle it ? I mean if you really like and enjoy someone, or miss them...then why not do something about it !!
SV>>I have no idea what is going on in his head. He’s told me he’s missed me before, that’s not the issue. If you miss me, then TALK to me! why would you go on not talking to someone you missed? Especially if you’re not on bad terms with them? I think that he feels like if he talks to me, then I’ll want to talk about the issue I brought up before…about being confused on our situation and what he wants from me and where he wants things to go…? I don’t know what the issue is, but he has yet to make a move to ask me out on a date either. He knows I’m moving this weekend and that my schedule is pretty full, but then why wouldn’t he just see when I’m free instead of avoiding me completely and then telling me he misses me?
Taurus>>And, if it all boils down to is some kind of game, at least have the guts to be upfront and honest, cause maybe, just maybe we women are sick and tired of male games !! And they say WE are the weird ones ! HUH !
SV>>I hope he’s not playing some sort of game. However, when cuspglyph did her reading of Pisces’ chart, she said that he was passive/aggressive. Maybe that’s what’s showing in him? whatever it is, we need to fix it soon. I can’t keep going on dating two guys. 1) it’s hurtful to them because they aren’t getting my full attention, and 2) I am losing energy, I can’t keep up, and I want to spend more time with the one who fits me best instead of juggling.
SV - it probably is his pass/agg coming out. I agree, if you miss someone you either want to talk to them or see them. It is really that simple.
Who do you WANT to fit you best ? Really. I would eliminate one just based on how you feel towards them.
Here is his chart:
He knows he can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar; when his good nature is imposed upon, he prefers to walk away rather than show open resentment. He has a great feeling for other people which he covers up with his independence under a cooperative spirit which really isn't more than skin-deep, for he is deeply an individualist and if it comes to a showdown, he will have his own way and make the world like it. He can take himself rather seriously at times. He is capable of a "Do as I say, not as I do" attitude in love relationships. He needs to be able to let his guard down more in order to allow himself to be more deeply loved. He is intuitive rather than logical, and his mental processes may be colored by his emotions so he may seem to be hesitant to speak at times. He rarely attacks head-on, and may prefer to cover his actions out of a need for self-protection. He enjoys first-class attention but needs to be aware of flatterers. His independence in relationships can be a challenge for both himself and his partner. He feels purposeful when needed, but it's easier for him to see what others need to better their lives than his own.
Here is your chart:
You have a highly developed social sense. Tact in human relations, sincere and decisive. Imag
inative, you like time to enjoy your pleasures, keen sense of your surroundings. You enjoy variety and living for the moment. Be careful not to compromise your happiness to avoid being alone. Find time to fulfill your own needs. Find ways to bring pleasure into your life. Experience is the best teacher for both of you in your relationship. You need to know each other from the inside, too. Your relationship must be based on higher values to work. Your relationship is 'an artistic journey' in mind and senses.
CUSP ! Thank you !! You are dead on. Reading that, it is so true. Thank you very much once again. I appreciate it !
Taurus, yeah no one likes rejection, but some people take it harder than others..like my crab holding on to me rejecting him for 13 years, hahaha. I'm glad you and your bio dad talked and you have him in your life..I think that's the best thing I've read on this thread...and you also seem to be the only one that's actually having a good relationship with a crab..
SV-Your Pisces sounds like my Pisces, I just got an email from him and he saids "I think I'm part fish" loves surfing, sailing, etc..but he seems a bit more communicative, he's writing me long emails..The Gemini-I went out with him saturday night, I thought we had a great time, had some great talks etc..On Tuesday I emailed him just to say hi and he emailed back "I'm having a busy week, probably will be busy until the end of the month, good night"..after our first date he was texting me and emailing me from work all day for 3 days! He was sending me songs, deep messages, etc...now the cold change of atttude..Must be my Leo pride, I liked the attention and now he's stopped...
BTW the other guy, the one that went to the US on business started emailing me again and I asked his birthday. He's a Scorp!! So Gemini, Scorp and Pisces, haha.. oh and there's crab..
I'm supposed to see crab this weekend. hopefully things will go smoothly and I don't have immigration problems...crab also said he's on standby the day before so if someone calls in sick and he gets sent to Beijing or somewhere then he won't make it to Manila but he's always thinking about the bad possiblities...yes, he mentioned that he asked for vacation end of november because his friend is getting married in Brazil, but wanted to come here for 3 or 4 days to go diving. He didn't exactly say "to visit you"...he mentioned that he's got a bunch of thngs to give me, and trying to get this creamy Brazilian cheese called Catupiry so he can bring me some..he knows I love catupiry..
Ok everyone please help me out in visualizing that I arrive in Manila and immigration lets me through without noticing that I am one week short of 6 months validity on my passport..they let me through with a smile My passport expires in April..They let me board the plane, I arrive in Manila, they let me through without hesitation...smile "Welcome to the Philippines" Not just crab but I've got arrangements to meet so many friends, dental appointment, diving trip etc...This is Friday evening my time so Friday morning in the US...
Thank you Universe for letting me into the Philippines!!
Scorp asked me if I asked him his b-day because of an interest in astrology, and said he doesn't believe in it.
Lua - thanks regarding my bio dad. It is amazing. And I see yo passing through immigration easy peasy !!
Ya know....my crab has crab time too. I could see him waiting out 13 years. Sometimes when we are together, I am not sure exactly where he is at !! lol Could be the past, present our future. i don't really know and honestly, right now, I just don't care. We have fun together, it works and neither one of us want or feel the need to become super serious. I honestly think that is why this works.
I do. We have both been married, have all the kids that we want and have basically had our fill, if that makes sense. i know we both love and care for one another deeply. And we honestly like one another.
We had a small tiff last week. It lasted like 12 hours, which 10 of them were me stewing while I should've been sleeping. In hindsight, it is kinda funny...he was just acting like a crab and I was just acting like a bull. He decided he was upset over something that happened like 3 days prior, ( after him having time to stew on it, and honestly, trying to keep his emotions from ruling him) I decided I was NOT going to say a word. He was somewhere at work where I needed to go, I had my ipod in and just ignored him. it took him seconds to send me a text.."are you mad" I texted um ya I am....what would you exactly like me to be ? You got mad over something that happened 3 days ago. I even asked you nd u said No, everything was fine.." Right after I texted that, he was coming out of a door..i was like f*%$ !! I went through another, I was pretty dramatic about it. I admit that. I was just fed up. Only b/c he knows he can say anything to me, all I ask is..If i am asking, say what you feel or think...don't wait till 3 days later after I have put it aside.
After my little drama queen fit, his response was instant..it was basically look.....I am NOT playing games and I won't. i need you and things to go back to the way they were. Please get over it.
Now that I could respect. I told him as much. I said FINE, I am more than willing to get over this. B/C I do not like feeling this way either and I need our relationship right now far too much to let this get in the way. Then we texted all afternoon. I mean like 8 hours and had a date that night......so....there's how it is for us.
Lua - So your Scorp thinks astrology is hogwash eh....LOL that is funny.