selina2 last edited by
Thanks - that's exactly what I'm going to do! Ignore him and get on with my life!
Hi" Selina" yes ignore it, when you stop reacting to them suddenly they start reacting to you lol
just mirror his doing, if you decide somehow to see him make sure it's on your term not on his
you can only control and change your behaviour , you cant do nothing about his behaviour, life is too short to not be happy
Star2them, sure YA right u didn't read my comment's, how could you not? There you go again trying to be these women THERAPIST.
Hello, "Ladies" it is important to remember that we all have everything we need now, and thta the essence o our being is Love. if we think we need to get something from another, we will love that person when we get what we think we want, and we will hate that person when we do not. Sometimes we feel more fear to communicate what we want to that person because we are afraid to lose them, but we need to try to never trade our peace with oruself and try to be true to our own need and share them. we are not met to get alone with everybody but we can at lease try to get alone with ourself.
We frequently have love/hate relationship in which we find ourselves trading conditional love. The getting motivation leads to conflit and distress and is associated only with linear time. Giving means extending one's Love with no conditions, no expectations and no boundaries. Peace of mind occurs, therefore, when we put all our attention into giving and have no desire to get anything from, or to change, anpther person. The giving motivation leads to a sense of inner peace and joy that is unrelated to time.
the hardest things i found when i was involved with someone that didnt make me happy or didnt give me what i needed was losing my peace of mind.
you are there wondering about this and that and trying to make sense of things and stressing yourself out
never mind what the situation you are facing, try to get your peace of mind back and try to get your life right in your hand and take control and responsibility to give yourself the joy and happiness that you need
stay close to your peace of mind
and ladies, STRESS is a choice, you can decided to let a situation getting to you and make yourself feel worked out or you can decided to let it be and do something that make you feel happy and not responding.
sometimes people that are not happy in their life attack you in order to get a reaction from you
sometimes situation fix themself without you needing to get involved with it
ImaginedNation last edited by
The advice in here is AMAZING!!! Star2u, THANK YOU! I have been at my wits end trying to figure out a Gemini. I am a Pisces woman and I have/had a Gemini best friend/lover. We were best friends for 10 years and on and off lovers for 3. He broke it off with me in February, and I still can't figure out why. He was stressed out and just lost it, I guess. I have been fighting so hard to be strong and to get over it, but this past weekend I got back in touch with him hoping to reconnect.... BIG MISTAKE.
He was like a totally different person. Cold, uncaring, very formal with the way he spoke to me. He treated me like a stranger. It was shocking to me, it made my guts turn. He mentioned he was in another relationship and I could tell he was trying to rub it into my face, but just slightly. I still can't get over how cold and hollow he was towards me. And me being a Pisces, it was literally traumatizing! Now I feel the heartbreak of the breakup all over again and I feel SO stupid for thinking and wondering about him for 6 months while he had completely forgotten about me and moved on. Why do we even want men like this?!?
Everything I've read on the forums about Gems has matched him to a T. These guys are the con artists and used car salesmen of the Zodiac. They will say ANYTHING if they think it will serve them in some way, and they will believe it, too- they are that gutless. And once they figure out they won't get their way, they flop the other direction. I could go on and on, I just needed to get this out of my system. Never again will I ever associate with another Gemini.
HI "Imaginednation" How are you? like you can see Darling, you are not the only onethat lived this kind experience with Gemini men, we practically going through the same thing.
i also made the same move and mistake then you with my ex , i have stopped all contact with him now and i have moved on.
I helped him a lot and offered all that i got to him but he never appreciated and he can go like yours so cold. I be worry about him and the relationship but he wont worry, he be talking to someone else or telling me like yours when i contact him his with someone else and then week later telling me his single again, KNOW very well what you are feel and what you went through.
The BIG mistake we make is to try to figure them out and trying to understand them and putting too much effort in relationship that they don't invest in.
we are left "women" trying to fix something that sometimes is not there, it's not there, there is no relationship to be working on and we in our mind think there is one but for them and from their behaviour it;s clear there is no relationship.
In our mind WE excuse them, We defend them and WE believe that they are worth it and they somehow care about us. BUT if you look at their action, Their action will show us that they actually dont care and we need to move on and get back to the most important person in our life and thats US, YOU.
i had my dose and my time i was worry and i wanted to understand what he meant behind the line but this is the past
I had to kick my own self and get myself out there, build a more solid life and be busy on myself then focusing on someone that was bringing me no support, no love, no friendship, no real connection, no investment at all
I had to invest on my own self and provided myself what i needed in first place in the relationship
i can tell you, i wonder like you for a long time , fighting with myself inside between my care for him and the way i should care for myself
time came now i dont care at all, i have let it go in my heart and i have forgive him for not knowing better " like in Bible" and i have forgive him to not have loved me the way i wanted him so.
Any men that take you for granted do not return the favour by not carrying for you as a response
always stay close to your feeling, always stay true to yourself, you are your best friend when things are not clear look at your heart and dont think for minute what you want is selfish and dont fear that you may lose this person if you communicate what you want to them
stay true, if a person cant hear and deny you of what you need dont do it to yourself
I think with that guy it;s time to let go, like mine his doing is life, they are too self centred to appreciate what you been trying to give them
and the COLD they give you when you trying to reach them is so painful it take you days, week and months to get over it and with those guys is when you start to really move on they come back with some sort kindness to try to get you right back in but NO, real carrying people doesnt just switch on and off at wish, it take real consideration to be friend with someone.
it's amazing how many of us are living the same things, its really to wonder what is wrong with those guys BUT thats just the thing, from the moment you wonder about them you are living behind the most important person you should support and love and trying to understand the most is YOU.
Now, say thank you, he teach you more then anyone something important and thats to focus on you
he give you a gift, that gift say, never chase or waste your precious energy on someone that bring you coldness when you bring them love. Love takes two people, if one try to reach and the other one is stabbing you, just let go of them, the more you trying to hold on to them the more you be bleeding from their coldness and unloving way.
and also it's aboslutely normal for you to try to reach and make contact and to wonder about it, dont push yourself to move to fast about it, you will move on with you are ready, the heart take longer
your friends and people around you may just tell you to move on but moving on takes time and a lot people deny that process
and also i found move on that a lot work on yourself to make it possible
you need to feel completely happy in order to move on, when you are sad and feel hard done by you simply stay stuck in situation so try to focus on build on a new you in this process
dont focus on move on from him you need to move on from you actually
by the time you look back you be over him without trying,
the thing is all those issues with get with those men are telling us something about ourself and about the way you love ourself really inside so we need to take responsibility about the way we have handle our life and about how we been trying to provided love into yourself
the only person that will should be mad at in ourself not the other person ever mind how bad they were., we made all that they have done to us possible by staying around and by taking our own self for granted.
it was hard for me to let go but i manage to do it so are you, let go and dont be angry at him, say thank you he teach you to love yourself
try to have a no contact policy for a while until you recover , you need that time for yourself and ever you feel you so, so need to get in touch with him, dont, go out or read a book,
join the gym, i love the gym i m always there
take care of yourself, really
the only person that you should and could be mad at is ourself,not the other person. Never mind how bad they were or are. we made all that they have done to us possible by staying around and by taking our own self for granted. Loving someone else doesnt mean we need to stop loving ourself or denying our own need, No it mean we need to balance our need. sometimes we simply cant found a balance because we are involved with someone that stretch what we can give too far.
Like i give you an example about my relationship with that Gemini,
he will ask me to see him at short notice and with very tie deadline, like i be at home and it's 3pm and he will ask me to meet with him at 3.30 because after that he need to get his train or he has no time after that time.
i live an hour from the agree meeting place, therefore ever if i wanted to i could not make it.
During those time you feel more angry at yourself to not make the effort to not see him but in your heart you know his giving you impossible mission to meet his need.
I will invest time and day, speaking only about him, about what he want to talk about, but as soon i need to talk about something that concern me or simply i asked him a small question he will vanish
he will reappear later in week without apologising about the matter
you in your heart you dont want to sound too sensitive and you dont want to start a fight with him, so you manage to convince yourself that it was not a big deal after all
of course it was not a big deal, it become a big deal with small issue like this repeated themselves too often and when his the only one that get his way and how he want it
all those things become possible not because he has charmed you to do them, is because you made them possible
you doubt yourself and you live in some kind fear that you dont want to lose that person so you back down
you deny your own feeling and you manage to convince yourself that what you feel, the fear, the doubt and anything else is simply no right for you to feel
you love him and thats all that matter
soon you realise that ever you love him more then yourself he actually dont love you the same way, he get his way and seem to love himself more then you have done for your own self
so Ladies, who should we start to kick, him or US, for me there is no doubt when we get inside this kind relationship it;s us that are at fault, its us that need to get on track and get a reminder why we came to that relationship in first place
sometimes we simply lose tracks
for those that tell you , move on, his no good for you or simply forget it, those people deny they own feeling,
you take the time that you need because when things end, you job start, the job to start loving yourself and finding more about who you are and why you got with that guy in first place and what you are going to change from now on.
you learn a lot in relationship so it's great to look at what went wrong to help you but its not good to dwell on someone else doing and saying because you are not them
you cant know for sure.
everything you say i could honestly relate to he always comes back like there was never a issue.. this hurt s me but ive gotten stronger im at a point where i don't even respond anymore it is a waste of my time i will not allow myself to be a mistress and he continues to text me of course acting like hes getting angry but i know he doest care about me he just wants that ego boost. i have stop talking about him which is a plus.... i dont like being treated like a toy
imaginenation take star2u's advice......trust
Hi"Ariesfire" i stopped too talking about that person i only relate to the matter by talking to you here girls, i really realise how much the situation was wrong for me.
you always get doubt to try to make contact but it will be not right for you to do so. takes time and hard work on ourself to move on for good and move on without any anger or disappointment in our heart.
ariesfire, remember that new guy i told you, he has a girlfriend at lease he told me but now he keep looking at me, i stay away from guy that has a girl because i respect their relationship, i lost all interest on him now.
we all have the right to get our piece of cake , i m not a sharer or trying to steal someone else piece ahah
hope all of you are busy and happy with your life, life is tough bu it's tougher when you feel lonely and unloved with the man that you love. have fun
chris926 last edited by
Gemini men are egocentric. The reason why they drop you is because they met someone new....the old saying "new face...new fancy"....
They never call it to an end, because they keep their options open. They know you love deeper than they can ever love, and they love the way you love them.
So when they wear out their welcomes with one chick, they have this former chick waiting and hoping somewhere for them to show up and do right....but they are incapable of doing right. They are emotional vampires craving your love and attention with nothing to give back but hurt and grief.
They are charming and amusing and sweet and childish and little boys at heart. They will wine you and dine you and take you to interesting places....but believe me, if they didn't want to go to those places, they wouldn't go at all. They wouldn't take you where you want to go, if they are not interested in going to that place. They will skillfully and slyly change your mind and before you know it, you are doing exactly what they want to do.
Gemini the twins...people say two different personalities....I see one personality, shallow, egocentric, artfull dodger, jumping in and out of relationships with the ease of a pogo stick, emotionally sucking the life out of you.
I look back on the relationship I had for 23 years....waiting thinking he was my soul mate, hoping for something that would never be. Then one day I grew up...and I wasn't a young girl....;You grow up the day you forsake what is hurting you and what you are being foolish about.
Gemini the twins are not twins at all...but mirror images....the Gemini looking into the mirror and falling in love with himself...like the story of Narcissus, who looked into the pool of water and fell in love with himself. When you are ready you will give this man the heave-ho...you will!!!!! God Bless you!!!!!!
Hi" Chris926" My God totally amazing how we were through the same things. Yes they like to make you wondering around and wait for them but we need to ask, who is waiting and wondering around? we do that to ourself. Those people are good to sell you some sort ideal dream with a partner that you cant really have. the truth is they are afraid to be involved in intimate relationship and they dont really want one
they simply need a quick fix when they giving you those eyes and those arrangement to meet up
The distance and everything that is happening with them kind keep you blind to see the real person in front of you, You start fantasy and idealise the person you are dating but they are so far from the image you have build up in your mind because the frequency of connection with them are so unbalance you simply have no time to realise this fully until you make proper connection with them.
I agree with you, i think there is 1 personality in Gemini and everything that happen with them, happen in way to suit them and they will play the confused mind to come out of the deal.
The thing is a lot people make too much excuse for them then face reality that the person they are dating are simply no engage in any sort relationship with them
they come and go as their please
moving in and out of relationship
they get away with so many things because the people they get involved with got no time to analyse the situation and their own emotion
Many of them fit so perfectly the profile of Narcissist, it;s chocking really
Having a relationship with a Narcissist is very destructive and never mind how much you love them they will never love you the same way ( if they love you or feel anything for you at all)
For this kind people you are just a thing, Thing that can be replace when you start to get a disfunction or you are not useful anymore
Chris926, thank you so much for your comment, how are you feeling now??
Star2them, you are so ready to speak soooooo Negatively about Gemini's. Do you ever have anything nice to say. OK, if their not who u choose to be with, well ok. It makes me wonder rather or not you a slight chace of being NARCISSIST. Star2 them PLEASE.....
So sorry for you. Just try to remeber Gemini's are able to LOVE, it may take them a little time, but they are able. Once you have found that person, it's a wonderful thing. Try putting your negattivity to the side and just enjoy life. Just remeber what ever you put in is what YOU get back in return. SWEETIE.....
yuyu78 last edited by
agreed with worthy1248
"Just remember what ever you put in is what YOU get back in return. "
be nice to people around you
Star2u.. Hello I have moved on and doing new things... I have completely stop all communication with my gemini which feels great. He still tries to contact me but i never respond.. thank you for all the great advice..
You welcome, nice to know you are doing well ariesfire11, life is too short to waste it away a new flame always come around.
JOjoaries last edited by
Star2 are you still around.. You are certainly the best your advice has made me a stronger woman