Hans, Im in need of some advice
You say I'm the negotiator? No.
as in what can happen now? no.
or what happen before durring the relationship? no.
is that possible? no.
should I??? yes.
or let bygones be bygones and move on with out a trace? yes.
can any financial issues get in my way of completing school? no.
he is a Dr, right? no.
why do you say I am the negotiater? because you are an empress.
buddy, you stop all this nonsense....
Be the empress of your life.
Meditate, meditation is transcendence --
of the body, of the mind and even of the heart, in the
okay...I will stop...
thank you a lot for your help.
You've reminded me of the greatest joy,
that is of knowing someone pleasing to the heart
and it matters not in future
if future is not a guarantee,
it matters how full my past is of them
and the great joy there-in.
It's the best perspective on my present
and should always be.
What a welcomed friend on this journey,
I have read: A man died and arrived at the
crossroads between heaven and hell. He was a clever
man, as men are, so he decided to find out as much as
he could before choosing which way to go. He made
inquiries of passing travelers about which place he
should visit first, about whether it was possible to
return, and so on. He was a man of great worldly
experience, and he was of the firm opinion that one
should find out as much as possible before setting out
for any place. Eventually a passing deity said to him,
"This is difficult! Come, I will show you both the
places, and then you can choose."
First he took the man to heaven, and it was so quiet,
so peaceful, that it looked gloomy to him. You come
from such an intensely crowded marketplace -- which you
have mistaken for real life -- that in utter peace you
find only gloom. When you move into peace you feel
sadness there. For this man heaven was like a
graveyard, because the graveyard is the only place
where we know a little peace; there is no other place
where we can be in any peace. Only the graveyard is
still carrying some peace with it; from the rest of
life peace has long ago moved away. We have made life
so restless that only in death do we have a little
This man found heaven so depressing! no color, no
music, no song, no dance, no celebration, no nothing --
just a deep quiet. He thought, "This is not appealing
at all. But before I make up my mind I should see hell
too." So, with the deity he went to hell also.
The people he saw in heaven were not smiling, not
laughing; nowhere the sound of a good belly laughter.
Yes, you will only find people roaring with laughter in
hell, not in heaven, because people laugh to hide their
unhappiness. Why should people laugh in a place of
utter peace and happiness? So when you see a man
roaring with laughter don't assume that he is in some
great state of being. That laughter is concealing some
great sorrow behind it; it is a trick, he is trying to
forget himself, he is trying to amuse himself. This is
why the more the unhappiness increases in the world the
more the modes of recreation increase. Movies,
television, radio, theatres, clubs -- all these are
inventions of the unhappy man. If man is happy, why
should he go to a club? He will be so happy and content
just sitting in his courtyard that where is the
question of his going anywhere else? Why should he
bother with the radio? All its noise will only shatter
the music that was surrounding him. Why should he
strain his eyes watching television? The empty sky is
enough -- more than enough! No, it is the sad man who
invents contrivances for pleasure and amusement.
All was quiet in heaven. To this man, the people
living there seemed sad. No one was even talking, no
gossips anywhere -- there was not a single newspaper,
because there was never any news. To have a news item
there has to be some trouble happening. In hell the
newspapers are published at every hour of the day --
and on beautiful paper. Nowhere else will you find
newspapers like those, because it is hell of course
where things are happening!
The man said to the deity, "Take me to hell, so that
I can decide where I want to go."
So they went to hell. Bands were playing there, great
decorations were all around right from the entrance,
everybody looked ecstatic, and the Devil was there to
welcome them. In heaven there had been no trace of
God's presence, and when the man had inquired after him
he had been told, "We don't know. he may be. he may be
in himself. We have no idea where he is. We only know
ourselves. And one who knows oneself -- that is where
God is as far as we can say." But in heaven, the man
could find no trace of God. Here in hell the Devil
himself, along with his subordinates, was at the doors
to greet him and embrace the man heartily in welcome.
The man thought, "This is the place to live. But
things are the wrong way around, the signboards seem to
have changed places by some mistake. Where it said
Heaven that place feels like hell, and where it says
Hell, this seems to be heaven." So he said "I am coming
At these words the deity took his leave of the man,
the doors closed behind him, and the Devil grabbed the
man by the neck. "What are you doing?" the man cried.
"That was only the reception committee," said the
Devil. "Now the real hell begins. All you have seen so
far was just to make you feel welcome; now prepare
yourself to meet the hell you read about in the
scriptures. That area is our reception area, now come
to the real hell." The man looked and saw the flames
roaring beneath huge cauldrons into which people were
Buddy, this is the state of the senses too: a similar
reception committee at the door -- and then the real
If you want to distinguish the essential from the
nonessential, then be aware, be alert to what the
senses say is essential. This is the religious
discipline. And wherever the senses say, "Here there is
nothing essential," then stay there, don't run away
from there; dig deep, and that is where you will find
This time the four stars of censorship mean: h e l l
Instead of doing good deeds, make a laughing meditation:
Every morning upon waking, before opening your eyes, stretch like a cat. Stretch every fiber of your body. After three or four minutes, with eyes still closed, begin to laugh. For five minutes just laugh. At first you will be doing it, but soon the sound of your attempt will cause genuine laughter. Lose yourself in laughter. It may take several days before it really happens, for we are so unaccustomed to the phenomenon. But before long it will be spontaneous and will change the whole nature of your day.
O, Hans, I'm laughing
cause it is your knowing
I laugh so little and I like that you
brought it forth.
It almost captures me by surprise
when it does come.
You're so catching an interest of mine
with a new way to begin.
It'd be a good new beginning.
I pay very little attention to most things
and much, much attention to very little,
I exhaust the small stuff
and this will be something to enjoy
bringing into my collection of the lovely
out of ordinary
found joy within their nearness.
It might just work.
with a dream head,
for we're living in them, too.
In the A.M. people might say,
"The sunrise hesitated,
as if it was in the know of a brand new day,
a day it hadn't burst upon yet."
Puck might slow to go,
"It was a girl I'd not known whom she
could wake to,
because of her laughter
and first I needed to find a laughing soul
to join her there in endeavors."
I do so hope I am to wake
life is a great interest.
that was a beautiful MSG to read Buddy. very nice.....thank you
it describes many things in my life, and a MSG that I will always carry with me.
it is just like a lotus flower coming out of dirt and mud. But it is not dirt, and it is not mud. It is a total transformation of them. Between sex and love there is as much distance as there is between muddy water, mud, and a lotus flower. If you had not known it already you could not have imagined that this lotus has come out of ordinary mud. Impossible to conceive, to comprehend, because the lotus is such a transformed phenomenon. So different. Of some other world. It does not seem to be part of this earth. But it comes out of this earth.
the whole work is to bring you to some consciousness of your self, of your being. That´s what it is all abot: an effort to make you conscious, to help you to rise above your biology.
and I do my further research, "how to" articles. I read an article last night.
I also started meditating weeks ago. I'm realizing a lot of things about my self. wich is good.
Hans, what a beautiful image this little lotus come from the muddy ground.
What a beauty in unexpected.
the true way is that of understanding your mind, not
of dropping it. The true way is: sitting silently and
watching your mind -- all its cunning ways, subtle
ways, all its strategies -- just watch, just be a
witness to your mind. And, slowly slowly, by witnessing
it you will understand what games it has been playing
with you. You stop it from one door, it comes from
another door; you stop it from that door, it makes a
third door -- and it goes on and on, ad nauseam.
the four stars of censorship meant: s e x.
Love arises as a lotus.
As science -- particularly destructive science --
politics, money and money-oriented search,
possessiveness, belong to the body and belong to s e x,
so, art, poetry, music, painting, sculpture, belong to
the layer of love. When your love is flowing,
when you have come to know a certain EN RAPPORTness
with a person, a certain oneness with a person,
although only for moments -- that too is enough to
change the whole life. If even for a single moment you
have come to feel that two persons have dissolved and
become one -- in s-ex two bodies dissolve and become
one; in love two minds dissolve and become one -- if
for a single moment you have known that oneness, your
life wi]l become a poetry, your life will have a dance
to it, your life will have a deep harmony and music in
That must be what I've tripped up on so much, for there's no physicality, no s-ex, no touch, but he's been 'within' me for years. Until reading your post, I didn't know if I knew the separation between love and s-ex. I know I know love now. I can write our joining, I can repaint him in tens of faces within a sleep, but I tripped up so much because I've not touched him, I may not even know what he looks of, for he could be green and not ever have really told me.
Part of me will say, 'But it seriously matters!'
and my heart goes chirping regardless, for it hasn't cared of anything, except what it does know and that is that it feels full and chirpy.
I spent too many years in a relationship, never had I been more lonely.
It's funny how it can be more lonely with a just anybody and that was with the physicality, what dread then.
Now that I'm on my own, my friend has been a good companion to me,
and I'm less lonely, even without physical, because I've got me and he has mingled well inside, like dancing.
Mendel Kravitz is a fitness freak; he lifts weights
and jogs five miles a day. One day, he is admiring his
body in the mirror. He notices that he is really
suntanned all over, except on his prick, so he decides
to do something about it.
He goes to the beach, undresses, and buries himself
in the sand, except for his prick which he leaves
Two little old ladies are strolling along the beach,
and one looks down and says, "There really is no
justice in this world!"
"What do you mean?" her friend asks.
The first old lady says, "Look at that! When I was
ten years old, I was afraid of it. When I was twenty
years old, I was curious about it. When I was thirty, I
enjoyed it. When I was forty, I asked for it. When I
was fifty, I paid for it. When I was sixty, I prayed
"And now that I'm eighty, the damn thing is growing
all over wild!"
LOL! Too funny. There's no lack of what is growing wildly.
if a person is religious, the only proof of her being
religious is her cheerfulness. Going to the church does
not prove anything. Reading the Bible or Bhagavad Gita
proves nothing. You can worship God and pray every day
ritually; it means nothing unless your heart dances
continuously, unless you create an aroma of
cheerfulness within and without. Then whether you
remember God or not, it does not matter. If you are
cheerful, God remembers you. And that's what is really
significant: not your remembering God, but God