Hans, Im in need of some advice



  • Hi Hanswolfgang.

    I like the fact that u are so down to earth and truthful about things and I really need to be helped back down to earth on things.Will you help with some advice?

    I feel my life going in a good direction but my husband is not on board so im trying to just leave him behind and take care of my kids but its hard cause im having a baby in Nov and I dont want to keep him away from his child but i think it might be for the best.WHat do u thinks?Also Im trying to move to a more cheaper place so i will be ok but im having problems with getting the money to move and I need to move in Five days,u think I will have it??11-8-81

    THANKS!!



  • hazel8,

    Will you help with some advice? Listen to your inner impulses.

    WHat do u thinks? Move in that direction, that you want to.

    u think I will have it?? no.

    Have you watched? If you don't use a machine, it

    lasts. If a watch is guaranteed for ten years and you

    don't use it too much it will last for twenty years,

    thirty years.

    But just the opposite is the case with life. If you

    don't use it, it will not last more, it will simply

    disappear from you. If you don't use your legs, legs

    will disappear; if you don't use your eyes, eyes will

    disappear; if you don't use your awareness, awareness

    will disappear. That's why man is not a machine. Don't

    use the machine and it lasts longer; don't use man,

    don't use your potentiality, don't use your body-mind,

    and you will start disappearing.

    It is life's nature -- the more you use it, the more

    you get.

    Enjoy, otherwise your capacity to enjoy will

    disappear, will be atrophied, paralysed. And tomorrow

    you will be there paralysed, atrophied -- then who is

    going to enjoy tomorrow?



  • why do you say that Hans?

    can you please clerify for me? is there a specific part of my/her life that is not reality?



  • sweetoty,

    why do you say that ? because dreaming leads to tears of repentance. Awareness turns the tide for the better.

    can you please clerify for me? go on your own way following your own light instead of just thinking about it.

    is there a specific part of my/her life that is not reality? yes.

    "Psychiatry is a lot of junk," said one man to another.

    "Oh?" said his companion. "Why do you say that?"

    "Well, today my psychiatrist told me that I am in love

    with my umbrella. Have you ever heard of anything so

    silly?"

    "It does sound rather daft."

    "I mean, me and my umbrella certainly have a sincere

    affection for each other. But love? That is just

    ridiculous!"

    Affection is okay: "... A certain affection between

    me and my umbrella, that's okay, but love? That's

    ridiculous!"

    Just watch yourself, the functioning of your mind,

    how you go on protecting, how you go on defending

    yourself.



  • Hi Hans

    Trust your week is going well.

    Could you shed some light on my romantic path, any insights and so forth?

    I am a 28 year old single female.

    Thanks

    xox



  • thanks Buddy. 😃



  • Mia1982,

    Could you shed some light on my romantic path: the way is blocked.

    any insights and so forth? gather all your energy inside of you for your topmost goal, your greatest hope.

    No, this is some trick of the mind. If you bring the

    past in, you can avoid romantic. Then the past becomes the

    barrier. Then you are protected behind a dead past;

    then you need not listen to the song that is happening

    this moment. Then your ears are filled with the past,

    your eyes filled with dust. Your being, afraid, is

    defending itself. This is your armour -- the past, this is your armour. You

    look BEHIND the past. That is a way of not

    looking. If you want to look really, drop all

    memoires, because truth is always fresh and virgin.

    It has nothing to do with the past.



  • sweetoty,

    buddy, that's perfectly okay.

    Perhaps you may change your mind. There is no harm. You are perfectly okay.



  • Thanks Hans.

    But I am open to a relationship its just not happening.



  • <3.....=)



  • Mia1982,

    if you want the ego, you will have to accept the

    prison, you will have to accept the boundaries. If you

    want a bigger and still bigger ego, the prison will

    become smaller and smaller, and the walls of the prison

    will come closer and closer. If you want to become the

    greatest ego in the world, you will be nothing but a

    prison, you will be surrounded by China Walls from

    everywhere, you will live in a straitjacket, behind

    iron walls.

    But if you want to be alive, then the ego has to be

    dropped. Ego is a distraction from life.



  • Hans,

    At times I wonder how it's possible to care about someone then end up using them and hurting them. Like in my case. Looking back, my ex would make comments about how his mom was never there in times of need. We visited my little nephew at a hospital ones and he made a comment about how he was left in the hospital alone BC his perants had to work. That might justify his sex addiction to needing to feel loved and wanted.

    Anyhow, I hold back from sending you MSG BC I feel I should just stop thinking/asking about him. But I wonder how he ended up being this horrible man that hurts and uses girls. He looks like a nice guy. I just feel so stupid to have put up with this type of relationship although I feel like a much greater person BC of it. He used me. and he walks away proably in love with someone else. How is this fair Hans? He must be okay with his self to be able to continue to lie to me and be with the lady he met wille with me.

    Buddy Im just confused about when it comes to the heart.



  • Hi Hans

    So any tips on how to drop this "ego" I have?

    Thanks

    Mia



  • sweetoty,

    How is this fair? You wanted to be burdened, because you wanted to experience your resiliency and durability that lets you remain firmly and faithfully on course. Such constancy deserves success. Endurance is the key to success in this situation. However, durability is not synonymous with stone-like rigidity. True resilience requires a flexibility that allows adaptation to any adverse condition, while still remaining true to the core. Can you maintain your integrity under any circumstance? Can you influence the situation without giving opposing forces anything to resist? Then you will endure to reach your goal.

    Buddy, I remember one of the ancient stories that once God

    used to live on this earth. But people tortured him so

    much.

    And people would not bother whether it was day or

    night, they were continuously surrounding the house of

    God. There are so many complaints to be

    made -- to whom to make the complaints? Everything

    seems to be wrong in some way or other. Somebody is too

    tall, somebody is a pygmy, somebody has accumulated all

    the riches and somebody is a beggar. Somebody is so

    beautiful and somebody else is just on the other

    extreme; so ugly that people use his photograph for

    frightening children.

    Passport photographs are also used for the same

    purpose.

    God said to his company, "This is intolerable. You

    have to suggest some place for me to move away to."

    Jesus said, "There is no problem. We can go to the Mount

    Everest, nobody is going to come there."

    God said, "You are still too young to understand and

    to see the future. I can see that it is not safe for

    many more days. Soon there will be people coming and we

    will have to move again. Find some place from where we

    cannot be forced to move."

    The Holy Ghost suggested, "Then the moon is very

    good."

    But God said, "You don't understand the problem.

    These mad people are going to reach to the Everest, to

    the moon, to Mars -- for no purpose! But if they find

    me anywhere they are going to kill me, because

    naturally they think I am responsible for everything."

    And then finally a man from the crowd, an old sage,

    came forward and whispered something in God's ear and

    God said, "That is the right place!"

    He had said to God, "Don't go anywhere; just enter

    into man's own being. There he will never go; that is

    the only place he avoids. You can be at peace."



  • Mia1982,

    So any tips on how to drop this "ego" I have? You cannot shy away from it, but you can drop the identification with it. Don't hide it, otherwise

    hypocrisy will be born. And don't struggle with the

    unripe phenomenon. Let it ripen -- and help it. Bring

    it to a peak!

    Don't be afraid -- there is nothing to be afraid of.

    This is how you will come to realize the agony of the

    ego. When it comes to its peak, then you will not need

    me to tell you that the ego is hell. You

    will know it, because the peak of the ego will be the

    peak of your hellish experiences, it will be a

    nightmare. And then there is no need for anybody to

    tell you: Drop it! It will be difficult to carry it on.

    One reaches to knowledge only through suffering. You

    cannot throw anything just by logical argument. You can

    throw something only when it has become so painful that

    it cannot be carried any further. Your ego has not

    become that painful yet -- hence you carry it. It is

    natural! I cannot persuade you to drop it. Even if you

    feel persuaded, you will hide it -- that's all.

    Nothing unripe can be thrown. Unripe fruit clings to

    the tree and the tree clings to the unripe fruit. If

    you force it to separate, a wound is left behind. That

    scar will continue, the wound will always remain green

    and you will always feel hurt.

    Remember, everything has a time to grow, to be ripe,

    to fall down into the earth and dissolve. Your ego also

    has a time. It needs maturity.

    Mia, do not start becoming more and more insensitive.

    That's what old religions have been teaching -- become

    insensitive. When you are dull, insensitive,

    unintelligent, a crust, a hard crust surrounds your

    being. You will neither feel pain nor will you feel

    pleasure. That's what is happening to nuns-- they try to become insensitive. By and

    by, you can become insensitive. Then nothing feels

    pleasurable, nothing feels painful. You come to a state

    of stupor, stupidity, where you become very aloof. You

    are almost dead. Your eyes lose fire, your being loses

    all energy. You are just dead stuff, a stagnant thing,

    and you will start stinking of death. This is the wrong way

    -- simple, easy, cheap. I don't suggest it. It is

    life-negative. It is violent; it is violence against

    yourself. It is a self-torture.



  • then you will not need

    me to tell you that the ego is ****(= h e l l)



  • Thanks Hans.

    Sorry I dont quite understand, you are telling me I should let the ego ripen but also drop it?

    Think I am confused here.



  • Mia1982,

    you are telling me I should let the ego ripen but also drop it? no.

    I never say what should be done. I have nothing to say, but much to show.



  • hello Hans

    my ex emaild me ( remind you I don't have a phone)

    why won't he just move on? my first response to him wasent friendly. I prety much said, you must not understand how you realy hurt people by using us. We will never have sex again so why are you emailing me. after that we emaild eachother back and forth. I asked if his still seeing that girl. He then tell me that he wishes I got that out of my head and he hasent seing anyone after me or now. He tells me he always cared about me. I replied with that's bull and reminded him how he broak up with me.

    The next day wille a sat at church I desided that I shouldent shut him out of my life. I'm not sure if he has good or bad intensions for contacting me but I have learned to have boundries, I learned he is not a trusting man. So I will be very careful with this man. What if his reaching out BC he needs amotional support. I'm not sure why he wishes to contact me.

    Buddy, you have said it's his constant buzz and horemones that keeps him contacting me. I remind my self about that.

    It may have Bern dum for me to do but I invited him for lunch. he accepted. buddy is he doing all this with bad intensions? I know there is a reasone why his still in my life. but will seen him set me back from pain, moving on? I'm a little scared to have him in my life. a simple gesture from him will proably grab my heart again.

    Hans you have said he



  • I know there is a purpose in everything that happen, everything that will happen. it may not be about me and life lessons anymore, or it may be. But I know this man that has an empty troubled spot on his heart that drives him to self medicate with alcohol and s e x. I can't turn him away from my life. I can't trust him with my heart. I don't know the real reasone why he wants to keep in touch. But I will be open to learn more. I will put in to play everything I have learned.


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