Need advice about my relationship & job issues
Hello everybody! I decided to join this forum because I really need some advice. For the last year my life feels like a roller coaster & I don't enjoy this feeling at all. Last year in April I lost the job I really liked & it happened very unexpectedly. My boyfriend was very upset when I told him the news & ever since he keeps blaming me for loosing that job even though it wasn't anything I've done to cause it. After I lost my job I've been actively looking for another job since May & several times I felt that I'd get a new great job, but it didn't happen. In the meantime I was working at home selling things on Ebay & I successfully made money that way to pay my bills. MY boyfriend also loaned me some money too. I must say that we have been together since 1996 & we had ups & downs in our relationship, but always made up & I felt we'd be together always. I also must mention that he's 20 years older than me. I'm 41 now. Anyway, he is very opinionated person & likes to be right about everything & likes to argue about everything under the sun, so sometimes he creates arguments out of thin air. He also has some anger issues.
Anyway, all this time I didn't have a job I was living at his house, actively looking for another job, selling things on Ebay & taking good care of him. Then in December I was offered a job that wasn't exactly what I wanted & I had my doubts about taking it, but then I decided to take it & see how it goes, even though I felt that the salary wasn't adequate for my experience. So I took this job & was very quickly disappointed with it, but decided to give it a little time & look at it as a different experience. In the meantime I still had to some bills (mainly my credit cards. so I asked me boyfriend to loan me some money. He got very upset about it, didn't want to give me anything, but ended up giving me the money I needed (I'm repaying him back). At the same time he was so angry & upset at me that he made me leave his house & move back to the apartment that I have in the city. He also told me he never wants me to live at his house again & everything is over between us... You can imagine how I felt!!! After so many years of being with him I felt that we would be together forever. We always done a lot of fun things: went on vacations, went to the movies several times a week, enjoyed dining out & I also love cooking at home, so i always felt that we have very strong connection & can always resolve whatever issues might come up. Again, as I mentioned earlier, my job loss last year didn't help things, but I believe that you have to support each other in difficult situations & I personally would never blame him for loosing a job if the things were the other way around, but he did tell me many times how it was my fault which was really annoying. That was partly a reason I took a job that I wasn't so sure about & now I clearly see how that wasn't the best choice because I work long hours & make very little money there, so technically it would have been better to stay home & keep selling things on Ebay. But my boyfriend said: You can be on your own now & I don't have to support you & I don't want to be with you any more. I think it's very cruel of him to treat me this way! i love him with all my heart & soul. Now I feel like my heart is broken in little pieces. I want to be back together with him I tried several times to talk to him about our relationship & how we can resolve our issues, but he refuses to talk about it. He says we can talk about other things, but not our relationship. He claims he is just fine without me, but it doesn't look like it to me. His main problem is: he hates to admit his mistakes & apologizing is really difficult, almost impossible for him. I want to get over this bad period & get back together with him, because I still love him & I feel that he loves me too, but he is very stubborn. I'm trying to find a solution for this &have been doing Tarot a lot lately, turning to it for guidance, but sometimes I get confusing messages: like I'd get Star card, Ace of swords & nine or eight of swords in the same spread. So, please, help me with your guidance & input. I'd love to talk to somebody who is a real expert in Tarot. May be, you can do a reading for me & help me clear up this issues?..
I've just done another Tarot reading for myself & these are the cards I got:
Ten of Wands - situation card, Three of Cups - Challenges/Opportunities,
Judgment - Advice card, The World - daily lesson,
Death- Near future.
My question was: What can I expect in my relationship with my boyfriend?
Looking forward to hear from Tarot expert!
Your reading seems to be focussing on reaquainting you with yourself and on rediscovering who you are outside of a relationship. That doesn't mean that you and your boyfriend will not make ammends. But it is suggesting that you focus on refinding yourself rather than on getting things back to the way they were in the relationship.
Ten of Wands suggests that the passions, desires, ambitions (so-to-speak) of what you had are coming to a conclusion. Meaning that the way things 'were' in your relationship are drawing to a close. That's not necessily a bad thing, it just means that your situation with your boyfriend has changed, and the way things were are not necessily the way they are going to continue or always be. Three of cups would be suggesting that you start focussing on your emotional needs and focus on how you truly feel. Look honestly at what your actual emotional needs are and how you can fulfil those needs. You seem to be over-focussed on trying to get things back to the way they were, rather than focussing on what is actually best for you (and your relationship's). This is an opportunity to make things better. That could mean moving your relaitonship forward in a more unified manner, or it could mean understanding what is truly best for you and your needs. But it's about looking at things from a fresh new perspective. The Judgement card is somewhat deceiving. It really represents an 'awakening' (the card is often called Rejuvination). It's about reawakening and seeing more clearly (for the first time in a long time) how things truly are, and how how things should be. It's about opening your eyes to new perspectives and it's about a new opportunity to live your life more fully with the proper perspective. Being in the advice position is suggesting that you look at all of your situation with a fresh, new perspective. Look at yourself and your own needs, and look at your relationship not as it has been for the past 10+ years, but as if it was brand new. This is an opportunity for a new beginning. One that is based on current wants and current needs. The world card in your daily lesson suggests that you once again realize that with a conclusion comes a new beginning and that a whole world of opportunity is now open before you. Re-evalute what is truly important to you. Both important to you as an individual, and important to you in a relationship. It's an opportunity to communicate with yourself and your partner in a fresh new way. Talk to one another not about how to get things back to the way they were, but instead of what each of you wand and how you can both get to that way. A union that works more comfortably for both of you. The death card signifies that there is an end to your old way of living. That could mean that you and your boyfriend do decide to end things and continue your journey's on separate paths, or it could mean an end to how things have been between you, and a new beginning starts with both of you continuing on the same path.
The way things were between you have concluded though. They will not go back to the way they were. Openness and honesty is called for now. Reevaluate your life and your needs. Talk to your boyfriend openly about what it is you want and need, and honestly try to find out from him what it is he wants and needs. If you are honest, and feel that you can still find that with one another then figure out how to continue together in a way that will make both of you happy. It's about honesty, openness, and true unity.
This may be an opportunity to rekindle what has been lost in the relationship, or it may be an opportunity to rekindle what has been lost in either or both of you. That may mean you continue together, or it may mean you continue apart. But this is an opportunity to rediscover who you are and what you truly need.
Thank you for your wonderful insight & a great interpretation of my Tarot reading. You are amazing!
Now I feel empowered to resolve issues in my relationship.
Can you, please, help me with another Tarot spread I did regarding my job situation?
The questions I asked were: What can I expect at work now? Will I find better job very soon?
The cards I got are: Situation - Three of Wands, Challenges/Opportunities - Queen of Coins,
Advice - Seven of Wands, Daily Lesson - Queen of Cups, Near Future - Ten of Coins.
Thank you so much for helping me out!
I don't have much time, but can give a quick definition of what I see from that reading:
You currently are focussed on you individual career ambitions and goals. You are concerned about whether your ambitions can be realized given your current situation. It's very much a self-focus. You are being challenged to not focus so much on what you are currently being paid or current responsiblities, but instead focus on what you are doing now can get you to where you wnat to be. Start think about how to get from where you are now to where you want to be. Also start expanding your thinking more away from just you, and consider also how you can aid those around you. Sometimes focussing too much on just yourself can limit the karmic returns from thinking beyond yourself and towards a group success. You are being advised to think of the greater picture and look towards the longer-term greater good. Think about what you can do now, in your current situation to grow towards where you want to be. Sevens are about looking more towards your greater self or higher power. Share your talents and dreams/ goals with those around you. Start focussing on what will make you happier in your current situation and on how to leverage what you have now into what you want for your future goals. The queens (which you have two in this reading) are partly about self and team nurturing and group successes. Your near future says that if you follow this advice, then it will lead you to greater financial and material successes in the end. But it is a process that requires direction and nurturing (and some selflessness).
well am not a tarrot reader.i think this guy doesnt really love u,take a minute,look at the way he treats u!he is not just into u!!i would really advice u to move on ....he is not the only guy in the world,and if he was then he would treat u with some sense n justice coz it wasnt your faul to loose your job n you have been trying your best to make ends meet to supprt your self which shows that u are a hardworking individual.pleaz do justice to yourself too....u deserv more than a guy treatin u lyk that.i would feel very bad if my own lover treated me lyk that.i would just move on....coz he gave u all the signs to show u that u aint meant to be.
This post is deleted!
I've done another Tarot reading about my relationship. The questions I asked: Can my boyfriend finally forgive me? Can we back together ASAP? These are the cards I got:
Situation - Four of Cups, Challenges/opportunities - Two of Wands,
Advice - Four of Coins, Daily Lesson - Three of Wands, Near Future - Emperor.
Please, help me with your insight! Thank you so much!
I've only got 10 mins, but here's what I see:
Your current situation is that your are currently trying to settle your emotions and figure out how to become emotionally stable without having someone in your life. It's very difficult for you. You are not used to being emotionally independent, and like having people to help you 'find your way'. You are struggling with the concept of being on your own. You are being advised to become physically independent. That means getting your own place, paying your own bills, and living by yourself in your own space. You may have to sacrifice some short-term comfort, as you start to explore this new independent life. You will be somewhat scared and sometimes feel alone at first but eventually you will get used to this independence, and start to embrace it. With this independence, you will feel better about yourself, and that will be reflected on the outside. It will make you shine more. Only in this situation will your boyfriend start to see you with a more fresh perspective. But be careful. The cards suggest that you may still be in each others lives and you may get back together, but it will be on his terms. He will still want to control the situation and perhaps hold you somewhat 'under his thumb'. He is more willing to allow you to meet his needs than he is to meet yours. If this type of relationship is fine with you, then there probably still is a future in it. The question is, once you establish more sense of freedom and individuality, will you be satisfied in a relationship under only 'his' terms?
Hi, I would definately get your focus off that guy. He failed the test. The test of falling on hard times. I think if you put your mind and energy into it, you can make it ok. I have a question though. Were you paying on an apartment while living w/him. Almost seems like a temporary arrangement, anyway. This guy doesn't have all irons in the fire and the best you can do is make a clean break.
Stella, I have heard that your not suppose to read your own cards because you will interpt them to suit yourself. I think that is what you have been trying to do. I will tell you I don't read cards but I can tell you what I was feeling when reading what has been going on. Before you lost your job, your boyfriend wanted out and when you lost your job then he got mad because he knew then you couldn't leave because you weren't working and that ruined his plans for a break up. You know Libras are all about feelings. That's why he would pick fights to argue it was working up to making you so miserable that you would leave. It didn't work out for him. I believe everything happens for a reason and there may be a reason you lost the job. So he would be force to tell you he didn't want to be with you anymore. I have read that one of the things that I have to learn this time around is to rely on myself. To take care of myself and not rely on anyone else to take care of me. I don't know if that's meant for all Libras or just me as an individual. I have always taken care of others in this life. A caretaker I am. I believe we are all coming in under a sign to work through the negative traits each one has. We are a little too trusting and we have to learn not to swallow every spoonfull of crap that people feed us. I also believe that people come into your life and leave when its time. They help with the lessons. This doesn't mean that this was your lesson alone. Look to the future your young and so is he. Move to the next door. And open it there maybe something better out there.
Hello, LibrasLair! I appreciate your opinion about my situation. However, I disagree with several points: I don't think my boyfriend was picking fights to break up with me. I've seen him picking fights with total strangers, his friends & all the members of his family, including his 86 years old mother, so arguing is just part of his personality, it's something he loves to do on regular basis. Unfortunately, as a true Libra I don't share this love of arguing all the time. I like to resolve issues & discuss things peacefully, but it's very problematic with him because he's so opinionated. At the same time, he has a big heart & likes helping people. He's done lots for me over all these years.
But he can be a complete control freak sometimes which makes it very difficult to be around him. I still love him very much & want to be able to resolve out problems because I know in my heart that can get through this. I think he's very stressed out now because he lost lots of money on the stock market in the past half a year. I know it's very upsetting to him & he's angry about it. Unfortunately, he directs his anger at the wrong person - me. I told him that he needs to deal with his anger & seek professional help, bu.t he wouldn't hear about it, So how do I convince a man I love to go & have some therapy when he's not willing to consider it?...He's also very moody & his moods change very abruptly from good to very bad in a matter of minutes which looks like it could be bipolar disorder to me, but I really think that the doctor needs to evaluate his condition. The problem is: he hates going to the doctors! So you can clearly see my dilemma... It makes me sad that he wants to fight at such difficult times when people need to help each other even more than good times. I know that I want to help him. I love him with all my heart. I can take care of myself, live alone, pay my bills - I always took care of myself, I'm not some helpless woman. I'm very self-reliant. The reason I kept my apartment while living at his house was the fact that my daughter likes my apartment & she likes to stay there when she comes here in summer. Yes, I have a 21 year old daughter from my first marriage. I was only 20 when I had her. Anyway, the fact that I have this apartment doesn't mean that I was planning some sort of escape from my boyfriend although he felt that I should have gotten rid of it. At some point we lived together in this apartment too. So now you have a clearer picture of what's happened. The main problem now is that my boyfriend wouldn't say he's sorry & that he wants me back, because I can see - he's not very happy alone. I also feel that I need to hear that apology so that we can move on. By the way, last week I got laid off my job. That only lasted 2.5 months - shortest job of my life! So now I'm unemployed again & actively trying to find a new job. I guess these are testing times for al; Libras/Virgos. I just need something good & happy to happen in my life now, because I'm tired of all the sad events.... Thanks for listening! You can write me any time directly to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Well I am sorry you haven't gotten what you wanted by now. I was married to one that was Jan. 14th and he didn't like to argue. And he didn't talk much if you wanted to try and work things out. He did however have a short temper. He used to get mad and throw his tools out in the garage. He had a friend who told me, "one of these days he is going to get mad and start throwing things and someone will get hurt, then maybe he will stop it." That never happened he continued with the tantrums even after we split up and divorces. Hope you don't have to wait for work to long. Good luck.
I am not sure if anyone out there can decipher this reading for me, but i asked if a certain person was my soulmate(actally i worded it like this: insight to find out if X is my soulmate). The cards I received were as follows:
Daily Lesson: The Magician
Chall/Opportunities: Eight of Wands
Situation: Two of Swords
Advice: Four of Cups
Near Future: Five of Coins
I will include a pic that will show location of cards in spread. Good Help Appreciated-ty
The pic would not post. I hope I have posted enough info to decipher-thank you much
I'll decipher those cards for you (as I see them anyway). You may not like what I see in this reading though.
You are having a difficult time facing a decision. The difficulty stems in the fact that you are avoiding making the decision because it is either something that you do not want to face, or else it will put you on a specific 'path' (and away from other choices) when it is unclear to you which of the paths or choices you face are the better. You can decipher more than I what decisions and choices you are faced with, but based on your question, the decision would probably be whether this person is truly the right one for you. I think it is a matter of searching your heart and being open and honest with yourself. Your heart and your own energy will steer you correctly if you allow it.
You are being challenged to be open and honest with yourself, and to start realizing that though the past is influential, the present and future is where you need to live. Focus your energy more on what is ahead of you, rather than behind. It's about openning yourself up to the infinite posibilities of your world, and where you can be in it. The challenge is to figure out who you are today and to use that to determine what you truly want and need now and in the future. Realize your true desires.
Following along with that you are being advised to figure out what you want and what will make you happy, and then to lay the foundations and do the work required to make that happiness happen. It's a change from within, in a more spiritual and enlightenment sense that is most important, and by finding inner peace and happiness, your external world or life will start reflecting that and then all good things will come for you at the appropriate time.
You have a hard time with this sometimes because you aren't always as confident about yourself as you should be. Sometimes you judge yourself a little too much, and can be very self critical. Understand that you have marvelous abilities, and should recognize and showcase them more. Recognize that you have your own talent and beauty all inside of you. Understanding your own beauty is the key to your happiness. Seek it from within first, not from someone else.
Unfortunately, the cards say that this is not the man that will 'complete' your world. That is not to say that he will not have a significant place in your world, or that he cannot aid or benefit you. The cards do not suggest that he is a negative influence, but they do suggest that he is not the one that will be with you forever, and is not your soulmate.
...that's what I see from that spread. I hope it benefits you.
I didn't mean to monopolize your thread with some else's reading, but I did see something in those cards that I wanted to respond to.
For you I can say that I do sympathize with your career situation. This can be difficult and trying times for everyone. I've found myself struggling with career changes throughout the past year. I too started over (from necessity) and found a new job and career that I believed was going to be very prosperous and last a very long time, only to be laid off after 12 weeks. The past few months have been a difficult path career-wise for me, but now I am on the other side and after much dissapointment and dissilusionment I am just starting a new career that is completey different from anything that I've done before and I am very excited about it. It feels wonderful and exciting again to wake up and face my day.
The thing to remember during the trying and uncertain times that you are now facing, is that every destination has a journey that is not only necessary but in the end beneficial. Sometimes that path is not clear or easy, and sometimes it is hard to remember to keep the faith both in yourself and in the 'flow'. But do keep the faith. Things happen for a reason, and pressing on in your journey will eventually get you to where you need to go. As unclear and uncertain as things can seem at times, they never stay that way unless you let them. Be brave and strong and press on. Good things wait for your arrival on the other side of this path. Remember that life is about the journey, not the destination, and to not rush things. Your destiny is never late, and never early, it get there at the exact time it is supposed to. In the meantime, do your best to enjoy the ride.
Hello, DreamerNorth! Good to hear from you! Congratulations on your new job! I know how hard it is now to find a job from my personal experience. I've been looking for a job again since I got laid off on March 23 & I've found a temp job that's in my area of expertise & it might develop into a full-time job although I'm not 100% sure that this is a great company, but I guess I'll find out quickly. I still keep sending my resume & applying for the jobs that could be good for me & I feel that something great has to come out of this. The way I look at it now: the other jobs I've had in the past year were simply stepping stones on the way to my true destination. It seems that other Libras/Virgos have been experiencing lots of the same challenges in their lives as I did, so it must be a trying period for all of us. I do my best to stay positive & have strong faith in myself. However, my relationship with Michael still preoccupies my mind & recently I've done another Tarot reading. My question was: What can I expect in my relationship with Michael in the near future? These are the cards I've got:
Situation - Seven of Coins, Challenges/Opportunities - Four of Wands, Daily Lesson - Queen of Wands, Advice - Eight of Wands, Near Future - the Devil. I'd love to see your interpretation of these cards. I'd really appreciate it. Thank you so much in advance for helping me. I think it's very nice of you to do interpretation for Kittysts. Looking forward to hear back from you soon.
It seems strange that the question I asked in this Tarot reading was about my relationship, but the cards seem to be referring more to my job situation. Does it look like that to you?
Stella21 Its seems funny or is it the answer?