Confused



  • A little help here please..... When a man erases his text messages he sends and incoming, hides his phone does it sound like he is doing something he should not be doing. Or you hear nothing is going on we just work together. Says he is working over but pay check shows no over time. Am I stupid or what?



  • As Ann Landers used to write, "Honey, you better wake up and smell the coffee!"

    What are your instincts telling you; you have them for a reason.

    Can you check out your intuition with someone else whom you trust?

    Should you have an encounter (not a confrontation) with this man and ask him directly about your hunches/fears/instincts?

    Please keep posting here. You have allies here and I'm one of them. Let me know how I can help.

    I don't envy you your situation, but then again, life isn't always kind, is it?



  • My instincts tell me he is up to no good. I have asked but of course I hear that he is not doing anything. I don't have anyone to ask what they think. Work and home is all I do. Any suggestions as to how to find out the truth. He gets angry anytime I ask him .



  • Follow your intuition.



  • Hi Hopefullylost,

    Just wanted to send a (((hug))) your way. We are here for you!

    If you don't have another outlet to express your fears/ hopes/ suspicions there are a lot of people here who have been in the same boat and who can offer advice.

    Up till now has your relationship been pretty open and honest?



  • That is hard because my head tells me to make him leave, but my heart says to trust him. But in my tarot readings i keep getting the death card



  • Most of the time I have not had to worry about this but there has been times that I have caught him lying to me. We have been together for a long time. Just not sure what to do. I think it is more of not knowing I hate lies. I think I can handle to truth a lot easier then the lying and sneaking around



  • Hi Hopefullylost,

    Know what you mean. I'd also rather know than wonder. Been down this road, got the T-shirt.

    Maybe post a question addressed to TheCaptain, she has always given me good advise and is scarily accurate with her responses. No-one can tell you whether to get him to leave, that you have to decide for yourself.

    Hugs again....Fan



  • You mentioned that the Death card keeps turning up in your readings.

    I would pay major attention to this.

    What do you know about the card?

    Something is ending, but something new is beginning. Another name for this card is Transition.

    Like the snake shedding its skin, so we, too, are oftentimes called on to "shed our skin". That is, that which is outdated, old, and especially that which no longer serves us or our Higher Purpose.

    Do some research on this card and see if the interpretations resonate with you.

    I'm so deeply sorry you're in this situation, but you will come out the other side. You WILL come out.

    The Death card is a card of a very high order, so pay close attention to what it's telling you.

    Peace be with you.



  • Hi,

    The card keeps coming up in the situation. Don't know allot about this card but I will research it to find out what I can. Starting over is hard but I know I will get through it somehow.

    Thank you



  • Thanks for the information. I know this is something I will have to come to terms with myself but any thoughts on the subject helps.



  • This is for the Captain,

    It was suggested I contact you. Could you please give me a reading on the situation going on in my life I would greatly appricate any help or advice you could give me.

    Thank You



  • Hopefullylost,

    Pls start a new topic with the captains name in the topic line - she might not see it otherwise. LOL. To much activity on this board to keep track of all the threads.

    Good luck.



  • ok thanks



  • Oh boy.

    He is up to no good.

    You know it already.

    I know it.

    And, he definitely knows it.

    (I was married to someone just like this; 'was' being the key word)

    Good luck and BE strong!!!



  • That is what I am afraid of. If I question him or ask anything he gets angry and defensive. Tells me that I am crazy and imagining things. I just wish for once I could get the truth from him.



  • Dear Fanofkmm,

    Thank you so much for the advice about contacting the Captain. You were right in how scarily right the readings can be. Still confused but I thing the fog may be starting to clear a little.



  • Hopefullylost, I feel your pain. Going through the same thing after 16 years of marriage. Of course, mine started about 5 years ago though with my best friend. I thought it was a once off thing because he was feeling insecure, turns out not to be the case. After this incident of yours trust will always be an issue unless you decide to seek professional help AS A COUPLE.

    Frankly I'm not surprised your hubby objected to you contacting the lady in question, the more you interact with her, the less secure he is with his relationship with her. It also keeps reminding HER that you will not go silently into the mist, it will always be an issue between them.

    Start keeping a journal with incidents and events, it might come in handy.



  • Oh yeah, my husband had me so convinced that everything was in my mind that I saw a therapist for about 8 months before I would trust my instincts and observations.

    If it smells like poo, then it is poo.



  • It's poo. Let me put it this way - my husband - who cannot tell a lie from the truth anymore because he has told so many tales - started hanging out in the garage all the time where his computer, tv and beer were. Okay - he wanted to get away from the kids etc. Then, he started locking the door and I knew he was talking on the phone (I also know he was watching porno on the internet). This went on for a couple years and then he really sort of started acting strangely, then on my little girl's 8th birthday he comes up to me and says "I have to talk to you about a divorce" when I refused to talk to him about it right then - he went and moved his stuff to his cousin's house. On the same note - I have a friend who I used to talk to almost every week - after my husband moved out. Sometimes we would talk until 2 AM. Once he even called to ask me about making cookies for his son and his son's girlfriend. Now I knew that my friend had a girlfriend but - in my mind - if she was around and he was serious about her - why would he be talking to me about his son's problems and how to make cookies etc. So a couple months go by and he calls me and starts to rant about how his girlfriend read one of my emails and did I think that me and his were going to have a relationship and how she had lived with him for 5 years, blah blah blah - . Well then I realized that he had probably been hiding out in the garage talking to me, or talking to me when she wasn't around - exactly what my husband had been doing to me!!!!! So I gotta tell you -- this definitely stinks and I would start stashing away some money - put together all of your own belongings if you live together, etc and start getting ready for an exit. It may not come to that, but its better to be prepared than be played.