How are you happy by yourself? (to cancer females)

  • As anyone that is a cancer female would know, it is almost impossible to be single... always searching for prince charming and never taking time to work on yourself, i actually hate being a cancer and am trying to break out of my set ways of thinking, i have been single for three and a half months now and its the longest ive been single in six years... it seems i always just find a new person right away and jump in without knowing them first because i am aching to be loved, i have a hard time sleeping and so i keep myself awake as long as possible working myself to death so that i can just go to bed exhausted and pass out. i know many ppl burry themselves in work when they are single but i have become an insomniac i will stay awake for 24 hours at a time and that is on a short day, the longest was 57 hours.. i know its not healthy but all i want to do is cry when i lay down because i start thinking about how no one is there with me.... I know my emotions override reality and i would like that to change that but dont know where to start. my friends keep telling me to let go and stop trying to control everything and ive sabbotaged many relationships with my insecurities... i was just wondering if their are any successful confident cancer females out there that could give me tips on how they conquered their fears of rejection and insecuritiies... i would much appreciate the advice -thank you

  • Yes, there seems to be so many out there willing to get into a relationship, and imitate love, that a Cancer female could find endless possibilities, but if you spend more time recognizing your true inner needs and desire, instead of accepting the imitation, then you'll be satisfied without a relationship and happy to search out and to be patient for the one who would be truly attractive by having the nature, spirit and exactness.

    Plus, it gives you the time and opportunity to love yourself more fully, that's satisfying in itself. You'll be better suited to be alone with yourself, to gain strength, an independence and an ability to love in return the true love

    if it does decide to 'pick' you up.

    Wait for it, the thing you've always waited for and work on the insides to be ready for it. A satisfaction that'll hopefully rest your restlessness and be able to sleep better.

    Independence is more filling

    then substitutions.

    Most relationships are only a substitute,

    so not at all satisfying...

    more troubles than worth,

    it's better to be alone,

    is what relaxes my restlessness in being independently female.

  • barbara

    i know it feels impossible but if you go through the pain of loneliness there is an understanding that comes through with on the other side and it's really enlightening and peaceful but we have free choice you don't have to be alone but the lessons will be learnt one way or the other you can be in a relationship after relationship in pain banging your head or you can do this excelerated course and go solo and gain the lessons and with that spritual growth you would be more selective with the choice of mate ...(discernment) good luck girl 🙂

  • you really think time alone will help me be more picky when chosing a mate? it seems like ill take anyone and try to morph myself and them to fit together when it just simply doesnt work... but i keep trying anyways because i dont want to be alone... it feels like its getting easier with time going on three and half months now and i feel a little better every day... ive never focused on myself before and dont even know where to start, i wanna go to college and i have hobbies i would love to do more but while doing them i still feel an emptiness like something is missing, i want to go to church and start reading the bible also.... problem with me is ill have this big list of things i want to do ill start them and then i wont finish them 😞 my mind changes all the time and the only thing ive ever know how to do is take care of the someone i am with -neglecting myself. I am trying my hardest and i am not giving up I am a head strong horse and i work my way through problems - i do not take the easy way out, i know when i need to fix something and this needs big fixing! so yes good luck to me

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