CAPTAIN can you HELP me PLEASE?



  • My boyfriend and i have been on and off for a year. This last time he broke up with me. He is 7/15/75 and I am 8/13/73. I love him and he claims to love me but he says he needs time alone. Do you see him coming back? Or should I move on? If so, anyone new? I do love him and it hurts that he left me. I am ready for marriage and children and dont want to deal with these inconsistent behaviors anymore.

    Thanks captain for your help.



  • I feel that you do all the giving in this relationship and your partner does all the taking, Wangchung. It is in no way an equal partnership. You are wrong if you think that doing whatever your partner wants will make him stay with you. It will just make this selfish person want more from you and give even less. This will never be an equal partnership as long as your BF imposes his will and you follow it. You both have very different ideas about what a relationship should be. Powers struggles can emerge if one of you disagrees with the way things are. A shared outlook must be found or the relationship will fail. And it's not right for your BF to do all the taking and you all the giving. You are extremely warm-hearted and generous and he is taking advantage of that. Sorry to tell you, that is not love, but greed. It's extremely unlikely that you will ever get what you want from this relationship as it is. There is no reason for your BF to change as at the moment you are giving him everything he wants - no need for commitment or fair treatment. You know you deserve better than this. Either fight for it or leave.



  • Thank you so much captain! I am not calling him or talking to him. I am getting stronger each day. It hurts but I know I deserve better. I just feel so stupid for compromising myself, putting 100 percent into it. I gave my all and only got 10 percent , selffishness, and a nonchalant attidude.

    Do you see anyone new coming into my life?

    Thanks for your help and time.



  • Don't feel stupid - we have to make mistakes in order to figure out what we truly want and need. There will be someone much more compatible for you once you get over this.



  • Thank you Captain. I am looking forward to it.



  • Hi captain,

    I think I am having a relapse. I am missing him very much today. Do you at least see him calling me or trying to come back....I'm feeling very sad today.

    Thanks Captain.



  • wangchung, you have been answered by both Hans and the captain, you have to try and focus on yourself, to start feeling better about yourself...

    Hugs Sheila



  • I know, I was doing good and had a relapse...sorry.



  • Thnks sheila



  • Your so welcome,wangchung, just believe in yourself and you WILL START TO HEAL..DON"T GIVE ALL YOUR POWER TO SOMEONE OTHER THAN YOURSELF AND IF YOU HAVE FAITH HOLD ON TO THAT..

    ANGELS ALL AROUND YOU,

    HUGS SHEILA



  • I agree with Shatz. When you are feeling weak, Wangchung, don't reach out to someone else. Study the weakness in yourself and try to understand where it's coming from. No one can help you like you can help yourself. You have to trust in your own strength and wisdom instead of relying on others.



  • Yes, thank you Captain!!



  • WANGCHUNG,DON'T BE SORRY FOR YOUR FEELINGS, you are hurting, but now you can turn that hurt into love for yourself...May you always have the loving angels around you.

    Hugs sheila


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