Letting Go

  • My 18-year old daughter is on a dangerous and scary path. Our communication which once was good is now sparse and strained. I have had the benefit of wise friends lately and divine blessings of comfort but it comes up a little short when trying to piece back my broken heart. She is a Scorpio and the more I push, the more she backs away. My only option is to wait and put faith that I have given her what she needs to survive the self-destructive path she has taken. I had a reading done last Tuesday and rec'd confirmation I have made the right choice not to interfere, but oh how it hurts. I am searching for the beauty to be found in letting go. Any daughters or moms out there who are kind enough to share their experience and provide comfort to my aching heart are welcome.

  • Hi Stormmee, I don't know if my experience w/my son relates to yours or not. My son was an excellent child. When I did start having problems in his teenage years, I can't really say it was all because of him. Our kids sometimes keep us in check, if it's out of balance, there's going to be dysfunction somewhere. Since I am an adult, I know what steps to take (experience.) Kids haven't learned or been shown, so have to find out on their own. When dealing w/her evaluate how you relate to her. Did you include her in things. Were you harsh or judgmental, controlling. Do you tell her that you love her. Are you always seeking perfection. I am not blaming you--just some thoughts. A lot of addiction issues, I feel, can be genetic. I don't know what she is dealing w/but if she is being a threat to her own safety might want to check her in for treatment (while you still can.) They'll hate you for it but that's just part of the overall problem. I don't know if your seeing a counselor, but that's a start too.

  • As a mum I understand the angst you feel. I have an 18 year old son & I really had to let go & let him find his feet. It scares me at times. As he doesn't live with me anymore I have to trust that he is Ok because communication is there but extremely infrequent. My daughter is 15 and I hope & pray that she will be OK too in life. My heart goes out to you. I can't offer much comfort for your aching heart but I can pray for you to receive the guidance you deserve. Take care.

  • Thanks rnrchick (and fellow gemini). I appreciate the prayers.

  • Thank you for your concern. I think I have covered all the basis you speak of. I think what she is going through is not really related to me and our relationship. It's something she is dealing with on her own journey. I think I am supposed to just wait for her return. That is the hard part for me. I could fix this for her if she asked, but she is not asking. She does not want my involvement. You're positive energy directed towards her safety would be appreciated and I'm sure returned to you if you are so inclined. Thanks for your comment.

  • I am a mother of a 19 yr. old girl (scorpio) and i have come to the realization that the only thing we can do is love them unconditionally, although we want to gullet , lock them up etc... we can't. putting them out isn't going to make the situation better(neither is keeping them with us). but at least they know they are not alone. Pray to whatever god you believe in, and always know in your heart that you did the best you can.

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