Hanswolfgang thank you for your intuitions
My past user name was iloveharperthismuch, but I had to start a new one recently under this name.
You'd given me great intuition once before, and very useful,
some of it on a 'dying' period of time.
I'm hopeful you could help me again? and have a peek-see, and let me know if the darkness is lifting, for I feel it has or is. I'm hopeful which hasn't been a very strong emotion for me for many years...
with a birthday in a few days, is there smiles my way? I don't know what holds me back from giving full trust things can be light all over for longer than a day. But lately, I'm tempted to.
I appreciate your care, insights and time.
You've a wonderful presence is my own intuitions
and a healthy spirit I like being able to respond with.
Oh! wanted to add and that I'm very happy, happier then I've been in such a long time, maybe six years or longer. So not sincerely trusting, but finally truly feeling a happy fulfillment this year so far. I do wait for it to fade, but I'm gulping it up as I go each day, thriving and enjoying it. So far, so far, smiles.
This became buried quickly, but I wanted to add more details (my mind wanders and keeps thinking beyond)...
What I'd really like to know of the dying period coming to an end (if it has, as I've felt the growth of new blossoms), then am I in a better position now to take on more, especially relationship-wise and intimacies, which I've been afraid to become involved with physically until my head and heart balanced.
As to relations specifically, the male I respond with (by sending him letters), though with such disguises and anonymously, is he the same male that I have responded with over many years or are these two different males and I'm just too much a pretender, or too creative that the details haven't much mattered very much?
Same male or two different? I never can tell, I just write as if the same.
~If this is too much to respond with, I'll understand. Again thank you for the insights, which have given me much to think over the months on.
I've sorted through some of these thoughts in my head.
I don't truly want to know if they're both the same or not.
I do like the mystery or at least today I do.
This all sparked a few weeks ago when I thought I saw him.
I think I'm just spending too much time alone these days to think about it.
He has gone from me any how for the time being.