Please Help ME I need some insite



  • I am so trying to get on with my life, but I feel like I am stuck in a tunnel and get out. My husband and I have been separated almost a year. I always thought that we could work it out. My mother is very sick and my daughter is having a baby. That is my only good thing. I have a job that is overwhelming and some days I would just like to quit. I am not looking for another man, just a companion. I need to move to take care of everyone to a bigger house. My BD is 10/27/58 and if anyone can give me some outlook to the future I would appreciate it. Thank you



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  • What does that mean. I have seen that before, but I never knew what bump meant.



  • Hi marsc135, the bump keeps your post active:) I hope you will get some answers soon.

    Hugs,Sheila



  • Thanks, I never knew what it meant. LOL



  • It took me awhile to figure it out lol.



  • BUMP:)



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  • Marsc135, are you in the teaching profession or have you ever considered it?



  • No financial



  • Hello marsc135:

    I read your post and canfeel that you are in turmoil emotionally. I can tell you that from your birthdate, which makes you a Scorpio born in the Chinese year of the dog, that you are very emotionally intense and a hard worker, very loyal. This being the year of the tiger (my very own year) which is known for fast and drastic, speeding-bullet changes and all kinds of upheaval, you most definitely are being affected by this. However, since dog and tiger generally hold each other in high regard, it shouldn't be an altogether bad year for you. You already work hard and this should pay off in spades for you but please do not forget to make time for personal indulgences; you are so busy seeing to others that you've neglected your spiritual core self. You yourself are worth all the self-sacrifice and loyalty that you give to others. Tiger is a wild and crazy year for most everyone but as the year winds down you will find that your marriage may have suffered because of all the other directions your attentions have gone. All is not hopeless here; if you feel that your marriage is worth saving, then try to slow down a bit and spend time with your husband to find out what the two of you together can accomplish. I hope that this helps somewhat, and I wish you peace; you deserve it.



  • Thank you Sea tiger. His BD is 3/4/59. It has been a hell of a year for me and my family. I just feel he is going through a mid life crisis, and one of these days he is going to wake up and say what an I doing. I am not sure I still love him or just miss having him around.



  • Marsc135, I think you have a need to have people around you that sees you take on too much responsibility for others. You need to spend more time on your own life for a change.

    Your relationship with your husband was no ordinary matchup. It was a highly complex relationship - at times extraordinarily close, and at others, barely viable. The reason for this was the depth of your emotional involvement, which was pronounced, so that if either of you took offense or felt neglected or unfairly treated by the other person, communication breakdowns and withdrawals were to be expected. It showed such enormous sensitivity that day-to-day interactions were more likely to be governed by feelings and moods than by reason.

    Objectivity would have been difficult to achieve in this relationship. Each of you is extremely private and secretive, and your ability to share at a deep level raises serious issues of trust. Any breach of the relationship's personal code could be viewed as a serious betrayal. Furthermore, you two can become overly dependent on each other emotionally, which you realise only when you are deprived of each other's company through separation or breakup. Together you inevitably face the problem of how to maintain your individiuality and keep yourselves from getting lost in an amorphous and ambiguous emotional fog.

    The competitive aspects of this relationship emeerge in family, career and marital settings. It is particularly important that each individual worth be recognized, no matter how successful you may be as a couple. Difficulties arise when your husband feels that you are being aggressive and controlling, or when you start to find him vague, misleading or uncommunicative. Living together on a daily basis will be problematic, given your emotional volatility and temperamental differences. Together you can complete small projects of limited scope but big achievements or a long commitment may be beyond the ability of this relationship. The prospects are more short term than long term for this relationship.



  • Marsc135, you are hardworking and dynamic, sometimes to an extreme. Personal relationships will be a challenge for you in this lifetime. You must overcome a tendency towards neediness and a demanding attitude in your relationships with those close to you and may even have to give up closeness in general if you are to turn your attentions successfully towards more universal concerns. Well suited to the sharing of knowledge and the task of teaching, you have tremendous courage and keen perceptions. Still, you must learn to be easier on yourself as well as coming to understand the value of relinquishing control and leaving the past behind. Ideally though, your tremendous sense of humour will see you through even the worst of times, and if you are careful to turn your energies outward rather than inward, you will attain the highest success and even gain the attention and respect of a select group of followers. Make sure you nourish your capacity to forgive.



  • Captain you hit the nail on the head. (Difficulties arise when your husband feels that you are being aggressive and controlling, or when you start to find him vague, misleading or uncommunicative.) That's exactly what happened. He became non-communicative and I became controlling. We depended on each other an awful lot. I am not sure I still love him or just miss having him around.

    I now have a male friend much younger than I am, that could of been a romantic interest, but because of our age difference I would not let myself get involved. If he was older and I was a little younger maybe things would of been different. But it is nice to talk to someone.

    I don't have a choice right now to take control of my family, my mother is ill and my daughter is having a baby. I am trying to buy a bigger place for all of us. Maybe after that I will take some time for myself. How do you turn your engeries outward? I would do anything to start a new life. I would like to find a companion, someone closer to my age, just someone to enjoy life. I guess I don't want to grow old alone.



  • Marsc135, don't let a physical age difference matter if you two have a common emotional, spiritual or intellectual bond. Society tries to impose this ridiculous idea that age compatibility is more important than soul compatibility. I believe you are attracted to those who are the age you are in your head, not your body.



  • Ok well his bd is 3/8/80 and mine is 10/27/58. I look alot younger than I am and he looks older than he is.



  • I am not as worried about my love life, just work. I am having such a difficult time with my boss. My job is so overwhelming, and my boss is on my case all the time. I have posted for a new position but haven't heard anything. I think she is trying to get me fired.