Moving forward and reconnecting with life...open to anyone who can give me a rea



  • My partner of 17 years died in October 2007 and in March 2009 I began a relationship with one of our friends, we had become closer over the preceeding months. Not an easy relationship, past history and age difference caused difficulties. Very difficult break up and now no contact whatsoever. Feels like another bereavement. Now desperate to move forward with my life but feel lost as to where to start. Would really appreciate some advice and guidance.



  • First,my condolences on the loss of your partner. It takes an average of five years to fully mourn and release a relationship of long-standing such as yours. You reached out for comfort from your friend out of pain. Appreciate it for what it was. You won't be able to truly move forward without fully mourning your loss. In the meanwhile, reach out to others. Volunteer. Don't even think of another relationship. Concentrate on healing. Fill your leisure moments with things that have sustained you over the years and that give you joy. I wish you peace...



  • I too give my condolences. Trust yourself. You will know what you need. It's a very special vulnerable time, try not to rush yourself or avoid or run from your tender feelings. I would suggest small steps of love out to the Universe it needs your love. Be it feeding the hummingbirds or volunteering, whatever, do good works and stay open. I don't believe anyone else can tell us what we need, but they can support. Listen to your heart.

    Cheers Pfree



  • Thank you so much archersbow and Pfree for your lovely replies, I didn't really expect any response and am heartened that complete strangers can care so much. I find it hard to trust just now, and your comments and support have given me strength. Thank you again, chefjessie


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