Fairweather friend??



  • I have a friend who I used to be very close with (female friendship) who basically didn't contact me when I was recently made redundant. No explaination, no arguement, no reason for it - just that I wasn't working and probably that I couldn't go and party with her... Anyway she called out of the blue on Saturday - no apology, no regrets, just to see how I was going..... I am unsure what to think at this stage as she threw in at the end that she has a spare room if I get stuck so I am thinking that it was only to do with the fact she got a new home and wants to rent a room.... We were on the phone for about 20 minutes and a lot of things were discussed but I am just wondering......... What do I think???



  • Go with your gut. You feel there is an alterior motive, and this is true. Be sure to discuss what is in the pit of your gut. If this person doesn't want to, and cannot apologize for what mysteriously happened, then don't go further with the friendship. Openess and honesty is key in ANY relationship. You have a beautiful soul and many friends on the way. You don't NEED someone in your life that isn't open and honest with you.

    That being said, if you have this discussion that you desire and you two figure everything out, then that's where it's at. You'll have a better opportunity for a better friendship. No guarantees though, cuz I feel a blackness around this person. It's nothing major, just a blackness symbolizing secrets and lack of honesty.

    Good luck!



  • Thanks - she does wear a lot of black... lol There is also another friend - who I have just found out today isn't my friend either.... Could the blackness be from her??? Sorry I am in the middle of massive changes atm - it seems my life is clearing itself out......



  • Can I ask you a difficult question?



  • umm yeah....



  • Okay....when you are with your "friends", are you yourself? Do you feel like you can be yourself? Because the message that I am getting is that you are being someone other than yourself around these people.

    I get that you are attracting the "wrong" friends for you. If you are completely yourself and happy with who you are, then the right friends will be there along side of you. I also feel that they are already there, but you don't quite "see" them.

    Please let me know if this helps in any way.

    🙂



  • Yes that does help - amazingly helps!! Thanks - you are very right 🙂



  • I'm very happy that I have been able to help you. 🙂 You help me with confirmation to develop my senses. Thank you.



  • Can you tell me anything else you are getting??



  • Yes, one other thing I got was these so called "friends" use you. They use the fact that you want a true friend in return for getting something for themselves. For instances "the extra room". If you go places together, do you pay for a lot of the expenses? Is your time precious to them? Or do they expect you to drop everything and help them out?

    Do you have a younger sister?



  • Yep that would be exactly what happened with the one that happened on Monday... Yes i paid all the time for everything for her and when I said I couldn't anymore she told me I was a penny pinching tight A**... The extra room with the other one not so much pay for everything - but there is a bit of using going on there too i think... And she does expect me to drop everything to hang out with her....

    Yes I do have 2 younger sisters - one of whom is the same as the above friends...... She uses me for what she can get all the time..... And now I am not doing it she has stopped talking to me... Wow there is a bit of a theme going on here......

    You are spot on!!! If you get anything else please feel free to tell me 🙂



  • Yeah, the sister question was related to that. I think it's a message that is getting across to you in the only way Spirit would know how. I am only a messenger. 🙂

    The fact that YOU pulled out that this is a pattern with you means you are learning the lesson here. Now, to put it into action is another thing. I am very similar to you that I let people walk all over me. Not anymore though. I really used to want friends so badly because my family made me feel so freakish. I never fit in, so I tried being someone else....whoever the company was, I'd try to be more like them or what I thought they wanted me to be.

    Since I have learned who IIIIIII am, I have had so many more dear friends than I thought humanly possible. It's simply amazing. And the best part is, they don't want my money (good thing, cuz I don't have a lot), and they don't want me to run them around, or drop things that I'm doing to help them. They just want my company. They just want to be my friend. It's a WONDERFUL feeling. I can truly appreciate what a real friend is now though. It's nice. Very nice.

    Like I stated before, you have true friends around you. You just don't "see" them yet. Open your new eyes, and you will see. 🙂 Good luck.

    Amanda



  • I honestly can't wait until that happens for me!!! I am learning new things everyday - seems this is a MASSIVE year for me - all sorts of people are coming back into my life!!! I am feeling more comfortable with the changes as they are happening all the time and almost each day I get a new surprise.... I just wonder where it is all leading to..... And who I will be when it is all over 🙂

    Thanks heaps for your help!! And for being the messenger 😉



  • You're very welcome hiprincess. Just remember: "The Joy Is In The Journey, Not The Destination."


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