Fobidden Love

  • At the beginning of the year I worked for a man who dob is 6/9/83 he came on like a ton of bricks and blindsided me and captured my heart and mind, I ended up leaving his company to work for another, my dob is 11/01/62 hence the age difference, meanwhile I have tried everything to forget about him but instead have become more obsessed. Need advise, thank you.

  • Wow...its okay to have this kind of excitement, but just realize its just a fling and you cannot defy 48 you are still probably looking good, but just like my sister who married a man 8 yrs. younger...when she hit 50, and was starting to show the years...her hubby kind of lost interest, and pursued younger women...he broke her heart, and I thought that she asked for it by going somewhere nature usually does not normally allow. Face it, and be realistic, and do enjoy it, but be wise and don't try and hold it, or control it...maybe you can keep him for a while by just being realistic, and let him know that's all he fun for now. He is probably shy with the younger woman and lacking confidance, and is seeking in you that wonderful thing called "an older woman with experience." Its not forbidden, and long as its legal.

  • sweetpcdenise - why are you running away from him? I guess I agree with marshland, it's all good if you keep it in perspective. I actually know several happy couples with 10-15 years difference in age (women are older than the men). Although I'd have to say, I wouldn't be quite as optimistic with a 48 year old and a 27 year old. But mainly because of questions like: does he want children? Could you handle hanging out with his twenty-something friends? Do you have any children of your own that are closer in age to him than you are to him (adds a certain wierdness to it all.) But mainly such a disparity in life experiences. I personally think that his lack of maturity would get to you before your wrinkles would get to him, lol. But everyone's life experience is different, some people are forced to grow up young because of circumstances and they are most comfortable with mature people - don't like the games that alot of people in their 20's and 30's can play. Think about why he is interested in you, does he say or is he just charming?

    I'd say that since you are trying to escape him, something in you basically isn't very comfortable with the idea of the two of you together at all. Whatever is holding you back must be pretty significant given the emotions that you are trying to manage. Probably best to listen to your inner voice on this one.

  • i feel compelled to ask the obvious question , is he interested in you too if so what is stopping you? Never know 'till you try i mean start small with dinner perhaps or movie or what not? ...

    I have missed so many opportunities at love for fear of making any move that not moving at all, i lost them... just go for it...

  • Hello sweetpcdenise! I could symphatize with your situation coz I'm also in a mutual understanding with a man 10 years my junior, and I know how awkward it is for you to come out in the open. I also agreed with the comment that you have to know where you stand with him or is it just a one-way thing? If there's not much encouragement or positive signs coming from him, I suggest you really try to keep a distance from him till you face an unrequited love and HAVE YOUR HEART BROKEN!!! However, keeping things in perspective is the best guide for you and what do you really expect to get out of this experence if you decide to go ahead with this relationship? Pursue, if you must but tread on eggshells and enjoy while it lasts! Nothing really stays the same forever, you must accept this truism. If it lasts the distance, beyond your wildest expectations, be grateful. If not, then learn from it and be wiser next time. Good luck!

  • sweetpcdenise

    I must say that i have been there...he is 1/21/73 and I am 8/28/58.Enjoy what is before you while it is may be a short interlude or last the rest of your life.the point is,take today to grasp what joy may be found because we are not promised tomorrow.Give him space to enjoy his friends and make time for your own.sometimes,the packaging hides precious gifts or may reveal the booby wont know til you give him a chance.Age is a number where the heart is concerned.

  • Wonderful and charming responses, thank you!

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