Bimoon please.



  • Hello Bimoon would you be able to help me with something.

    Maybe you can guess what it is. I'm not very comfortable with saying it here. 🙂

    Thank you.

    X



  • I can't really answer honestly and hide what you ask unless I too just say ambiguious things. First, it is very hard to read peolple who are not open. You hide a lot. I was drawn to your posts before yet repelled--you give mixed messages and I feel you've heard this before. There is so much of yourself that is missing--you wait for some other energy to take over for you. It's as if you are missing in your own life. You are very beautiful and talented (smart!)--have a sweet soothing voice but you hold back. You are not safe like this because in giving away control you invite the wrong people to take over. Luckily you have lots of protection around you on the other side but they work overtime! You need to feel comfortable with your power to be who ever you are--to speak up when you feel things--good and bad. To not be apologetic for wanting more. Some outside influence over dominated you at an early age--it's as if you lived under someone elses shadow. I pick up an abusive ocd habit you use to keep your energy small. You need healing--a group for women--body image issues and abuse issues. If you do not heal you will attract controlling poeple into your life--be easily manipulated and used. You deserve to be loved! Once you've confronted and worked through this problem with proffessional help you could really be of service to other young woman! I see this as a reality--you standing tall--chin up face aglow--walking into your bright office and lighting up the room and extending your hand to the the young girl curled up small in the chair. You could be such a healer---just do the work!



  • I think this is exactly right, Im not good at opening up and lately things have seemed to get alot worse.

    The healing group thing you mentioned, would you beable to help me work on that, My family arn't very co-operative espeacily my mother who thinks work is more important, which it probably is right now because of fiance issues that we always seem to have.

    I want to beable to move away from my family at some point, they dont understand me and they dont like who i am. i cant change myself for them. i like who i am.

    They are very sarcastic people, i dont like that much because i take everything too personal, which sometimes really puts me down. i have fights with my sisters constantly, and its almost like a battle in the house. Theres a big energy thing going on here and its all directed at me. its like i get all their negative stuff put on me, and cant shake it off. Maybe you could help with that too, i feel exaughsted most of the day and have to sleep alot.

    Theres just abit about what i feel. maybe that will help more 🙂



  • I want to tell you about my friend, She is very important to me, and i don't know why i am telling you this but i feel like its right to say. and somehow feel like your the right person to talk to about it. i wasn't comfortable with going into full detail with the captain about my feelings, but something about your reply has made me want to talk to you.

    I have previously talked to the captain about her, her birthday is 25 February 1964 The captain said we are both soul mates, Karmic ones. and i have strange feelings for her when i am around her.

    Sometimes it makes me feel uncomfortable because i don't quit understand it. I am still scared of this feeling because i am confused at what it is.

    The captain also mentioned that she does not talk to me or think about me like i think about her because she is busy with her own life, and has other things on her mind, which is quit understandable, but it does get to me a lot when she does not talk to me. sometimes i believe is it because of me but then I'm just silly like that lol

    I don't get the security i need from my family or my mother, the captain also thinks that i am looking for a mother substitute in her, which is probably true but again i am not sure. i don't know what to do about these feelings.Would really appreciate some help if you can. i will try and tell you everything if you want me to. just let me know if you need anything else. and will wait patiently for your reply 😄 thanks again. sorry its so long but i had it in my head and wanted to get it out.



  • There are two things going on--yes a star crossed attraction on your part--maybe a moon compatability AND that OCD I mentioned to you. Meaning that you need an obssession to fixate on to fill the void AND to ward off the pain you feel. You are in deep pain--isolation and wandering around right now with blindfold on. Part of this situation is the reality of YOUTH--you are fresh into your journey towards healing. Your need for distraction and obbssession sometimes takes a dark turn--goes into fear mode. Are you afraid of being gay? First, you do not have to be gay to have a strong attraction to the same sex. You won't hear a lot of talk about it but it happens all the time. If you are LUCKY you will have girlfriends that you love to be near and never fight with ever and can't get enough of--you hug love to touch but nothing sexual. It's very special. If you are having sexual thoughts please do not be so harsh on yourself. You are too young and have so many issues right now it is hard to make that fear a truth. I am psychic but mostly the energy around you is "confusion" very heavy confusion. Also spirit keeps redirecting me away from this question about her because they insists the real problem is being hidden by this obssession. If you were not obssessing about her it would be something else--the shape of your nose---the imagined flaw on your hip--the list would be endless. You need a very wise female counselor to guide you through your healing process. There are free crisis centers. I will pray you will find the right help. You could try first finding a spiritual church. A school councelor. Look up online for womens services in your area--do not wait for help to knock on your door. Pray for a female to come into your life who can help you--someone you feel kin to as sometimes our birth families are not our spiritual kin. If you have felt attracted to women all your life then look in that dirsection--there are gay lesbian organizations in every city. At least it will help you sort fear from reality. Spirit keeps repeating the word SHAME--she has shame issues--shows me with your head down face covered. I won't say it here but see a childhood incident that was more comman and innocent then you have made it. Once you can share this with a trusted person in the healing field you will make real progress. Blessings--it will get better--you are in my prayers.



  • PS. IF what you are hiding is your sx ul oriantation please don't be ashamed--My young niece is getting married to her girlfriend this summer--yes her parents freaked (very religious) but they learned to accept and she is beautiful very smart and the sweetest spirit and not an ounce of shame(all through high school she dated boys!)--very happy girl--living life to the fullest--travels and has a very rewarding job--buying their first house. Will it last? Who knows--life is in the moment and all I see is love love love. I honestly pick up that you could go either way but you need to know whatever your truth is --it's your right to live it. I think because she makes no apologies for her truth she gets back that acceptence. If you walk around being ashamed of something--you definetly will invite outside disaproval to back it up. Energy has it's own laws of attraction.



  • well i guess thats kind of all true aswell. im just trying to make sense of what you said, i think i am afraid of sxul oriantation. i know nothing about how relationships work. iv not rly been into boys the girls at college, all they talk about is boys, and it gets boring sometimes lol

    I guess iv had weird attractions to other girls but dont really now if it means something. i always think girls are prettier and somewhat Hotter than boys if you know what i mean lol.I dont really understand boys very much i had a relationship with one for 2 years it was a long distance relationship and eveytime we got together id feel uncomfortable.

    He didn't understand me then i think he does more now though.



  • It's just as spirit said--too much confusion going on and no one problem is the reason. Sometimes confusion in attractions is more of an intimacy issue than anything gender--meaning you have issues getting close and it takes someone truelly perceptive and attracted to you enough to push through that wall you hide behind. The place to start in this journey is self acceptance no matter what--love yourself in all your imperfect perfection--celebrate your uniqueness and you will attract your own kind. I know this sounds silly but everytime you pass a mirror say hello there gorgeouse and give yourself a bigkiss and say I love you. Small changes will take you far.



  • I guess I didn’t really know I was obsessing about her, well I had an idea, I was wondering why I was thinking about her a lot. The feelings I get from her I guess am afraid of, I guess I thought I could talk to her about my issues as she has been through the same thing almost, and she understands me.

    I am going to a psychic fair with my dad on the 28th maybe ill fined someone there to help who knows.

    I guess I find it hard to trust certain people to know about my feelings.

    I don’t really understand them myself, I know I obsess about myself sometimes too, I feel I am not needed where I am, and I feel like I need to belong somewhere, If you know what I mean

    I sometimes feel really angry with my family, I don’t know why or maybe I do,

    I try my best to get on with them but its difficult being somewhere I don’t want to be so I guess I’m putting up with it, they are very judgmental and they judge me for what I wear and how I act.

    I love to write stories and I wrote a story for my college tutor, she read it out to the class and they loved it.

    It was parents evening the following afternoon,

    And my tutor was saying why don’t I do an English course or something,

    My mum was being realistic and saying that I needed a job to get me money first before I did all that stuff, then today my tutor said to me that it seemed like she didn’t want me to write. Which I feel is kind of true.

    And also I applied to go to Farnham College to do childcare level 2 cause I love working with kids too. And the first application I done, was burned like half burned, I was wondering if that was an accident or purposely done. I re did my application this morning, and hoping to send it off some point this week.

    I don’t know why I’m telling you this stuff maybe there’s a reason.

    Thanks again for the help. sorry its so long. X



  • It's just as spirit said--too much confusion going on and no one problem is the reason. Sometimes confusion in attractions is more of an intimacy issue than anything gender--meaning you have issues getting close and it takes someone truelly perceptive and attracted to you enough to push through that wall you hide behind. The place to start in this journey is self acceptance no matter what--love yourself in all your imperfect perfection--celebrate your uniqueness and you will attract your own kind. I know this sounds silly but everytime you pass a mirror say hello there gorgeouse and give yourself a bigkiss and say I love you. Small changes will take you far.

    -x-

    Thankyou for that i guess we posted at the same time 🙂



  • i was hoping to ask you a favour, if you can i was woundering if my nan has any messages for me. i know its probably been along time, but id just like to know, i dont remember her exact birthday but i think its feburary 29th i dont know the year, her name was pamela Bonner thanks again.



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  • Let me get back to you in a day or two on the request---I'm detaching from this sight for a bit and building up steam for a difficult reading I promised someone. Spirit did grab me today though for a quik comment for you. The school decision. I will share my own "college" choice. At first it was my mother's idea--I was young--small children and in her mind it was all really about helping her and planning towards making money. So, I tried her way--she offered to pay for a class to do jewelry repair with the idea of joining her in her Antique buisness. As in the past, I was always learning jobs as an extension to her buisness. I made money yes--at furniture repair--chair caning--refinishing--art repair etc. BUT my mother always had control. Weird thing was as I was signing up for the jewelry class with her check in my hand a very bold spirit in me took over and I also signed up for a music class (I already played an instrument but worried I needed more) AND I signed up for a creative writing class. I was still afraid of my mom back then and yet felt strong about the selfish choice for MYSELF. To sum it up quik the jewelry class was a bust--the teacher ended up in the hospital and so the class just rambled along on it's own with the help of past students but nothing went well at all for me no matter how I tried to make it work. The music class didn't work out either--the prof. had a nervouse break down! I was just beginning to think the whole college idea was not for me but the creative writing prof. really pulled me in and boy did THAT take off! I blossomed! And signed up for another semester AND won a first place award for my poetry! Of course to my mom all she saw was failing her in one more way with the jewelry repair idea but I just sucked it up and put all I had into writing. For the next years I so struggled with not having money--my husband barely made enough duruing a bad recession and of course my mom talked bad about me as a bum who should get a job and stop chasing writing dreams but I stayed hitched to that dream and many times almost gave up as it is a rough path--many rejections--failures come with the awards! People always came into my life and helped me. Looking back I am so glad I followed that dream for myself as it was my destiney. I am a Poet. No, it does not pay! I also work with children in one of the best private schools but NO degree--imagine that! I started at the bottom and have gathered a very impressive resume just living my talents as a writer. I am very connected to all the local colleges. There are many roads to take and some are not by the book. Leave room for YOUR dreams and they will pull you forward and if your mother pushes you in the wrong direction it just will not work--and if it doesn't--let the failure thing go--sometimes it's divine intervention. I'll get back to you in a day or two after the other reading I promised someone and I will listen for a message from your loved one. Blessings.



  • Blmoon thank you, i will keep bumping this thread if you don't mind

    and go ahead take your time thank you for your encouragement i think that's what it was 🙂

    Best wishes

    RebeccaAnn



  • PS

    Spirit says I forgot to add that education WAS very important and I did take classes for many years but always followed my intuition instead of degree rules. I took many honors and selective studies classes--always maintained an A. I took a lot of computer classes and ended up so good at graphics and publishing that the college paid me to give demonstrations on a para poifessional basis. I did this for awhile without even owning my own computer! I put in many hours at the schools computer lab. I did the work! I worked very very hard while juggling family. When you go with your talents people take notice--I always made money at free-lance work and got invited by colleges and local arts venues to work at challenging projects that make for a valuable resume without that degree. BUT I have as many credits earned as any degree but it only was a pathway for my life goals. Spirit says always keep an open mind and don't let anyone tell you there is only one way to get your education.



  • Spirit says always keep an open mind and don't let anyone tell you there is only one way to get your education

    -x-

    What happens if someone forces me to do something i like doing but not really my dream, i think i want to become a writer though mum says it doesn't pay

    i want to keep my options open but i don't know what too look for 🙂

    Best wishes

    RebeccaAnn



  • Ps

    I didn't get very good Gsce's and i feel my only goals are either childcare or writing