Scorpio male HELP!!!!!! PLEASE!!!



  • condoms



  • As i showered from the bike ride, my "gut" was loud and clear, and I was not comfortable, having recalled the way he reacted to my texts and phone call, like he put me off...and although we talked about it and he said he was mad that he couldn't go on the trip, and we couldn't come to an agreement on the expenses of the trip, he wasn't going to wait around by the phone. I said to him that two weeks prior to the trip, he was "fine" with knowing he couldn't afford it, and i knew I needed to support him in that decision, and it seemed fine. Apparently, it wasn't. He, I feel, punished me because he wasn't on the trip and I was. Additionally, I am leaving on another trip the end of the month international, and he isn't going.

    While he showered, I looked in a drawer, that I normally don't go in... This is the drawer by his side of the bed which has condoms in it. A few months ago, i opened that drawer in front of him and asked him why he needed to have those condoms there?

    He didn't say anything specific, just kind of not paid attention to my question and I didn't pursue an answer.

    But after my shower, and my suspicion which my gut told me, I waited until he got in the shower and looked in the drawer...please know this is so untypical of me and of aquarians. We usually trust and he is one of two people in which my gut spoke to me. I opened the drawer and counted two less condoms...go figure.

    He said i am nosey and suspicious, and snoopy and i miscounted... i broke up with him because I can't be in a relationship where i feel suspicious.. and if it's me, i can fix it, but if it's truly him, he doesn't get a second chance. So I am licking my wounds and the question remains why he didnt' try to make me feel more secure???

    Last month he wanted me to move in with him...please.



  • zendi.

    did you use condoms together?



  • also,

    you said that he said that there were differences. did you find out what they were? your story is starting to sound hauntingly familiar...



  • we used condoms in the beginning of course, and then when we announced our exclusivity for one another it became a mute point. The differences were where he is financially as to where I am use to.. In a away, he appeared more solvent than he claims to be now.

    I am not looking for match me a millionarie, but also not seeking a man who needs to reorganize after a bankruptcy.

    he needs to know that dating does cost, whether its dinner at his house or dinner out. And as a woman, more traditional and very educated, I don't like to carry a man financially.

    I agreed to be conservative with his budget, because I felt it was the right thing to do.

    Hauntingly familiar such as??



  • I concluded that forward is the energy and motion of the future and dwelling on what wasn't is not productive. I explained what i need and people have to figure it out. Like an employer who says; your job description is such and such. The need to do less wont' work and the need to do more isn't necessary.

    We are responsible to put things in perspective with the help of our past as a guide and maybe good friends that can keep it real?

    z



  • zendi,

    i also had a missing condoms experience last year. he denied using them with anyone else and first said he had them all could prove it, then when i didnt speak to him he said he had been "practising" , i just couldnt believe any of it. then he accused me of stealing them and then that they had fallen down the back of the cupboard. unbelievable. i broke up with him and went overseas for a few months. he still denies cheating. and i will never really know i guess. but the insecurity of feeling suspicious is the worst feeling in the world. to think that someone you love is lying to you, hurts like hell. i know i also have trust issues. but he was always very secretive. with his phone too.

    he is very goodlooking and i know many women have liked him in the past and that he has had alot of lovers. sigh this is bringing up all sorts of c.rap.

    you sound fairly independant like me. like travel. i am cross cultured so i travelled alot when i was a child to my fathers birth country and as i have grown up it just became the norm to go on trips away. my mother was very adventurous too. the scorp i have known went on a couple of small trips with me at the beginning .. but it was an effort to get him to go. when he went he loved it, but for some reason he has always resisted. often saying he just wants to work etc etc. so then i go by myself and he punishes me. i think deep down the scorp man likes the woman to be b his side.. meaning where he knows where she is,, he thought that me going away was to meet other men and he couldnt have been further from the truth. for me it has always been either to connect with nature or re inspire myself.. makes me appreciate my own surroundings more and opens my mind to new ways of being. i have liked to experience other cultures too. anyway.. when my scorp didnt trust me going away i was offended then it made me think i couldnt trust him and wondered where it was all coming from. when i was away i found out he went out with his friends drinking. ah the double standards.. whilst i didnt go out at all while i was away. sigh....

    i really wished we couldve gt counselling over this stuff. we were booked in two months ago but he didnt show up . he was angry cos i went away. but i was sick of him dangling carrots of us going away together then not making arrangements or backing out so ijust thought stuf it ill go by myself.then he would say" well then it should be fine for me to go on a trip then" i never said it wasnt. but it made me so angry that 1) he was teasing me with a holiday and not following through 2) why couldnt he come away with me and be happy about it and just enjoy it 3) punish me for going away .. plenty of couples go on a holiday and doesnt mean they are any less committed. i think he struggles with jealousy.. i have financial stability than him and it bugs him. i own a house he doesnt. but i have never judged him so why should he judge me??

    sorry i am rambling alot..

    i dont know the full story of you and your scorp. but whether he was cheating or not.. it seems like there was a lack of understandind/acceptance/communication.

    these men are very sexual but they battle all sorts of things in themselves. just being man confuses them at times i think. how long have you been with him. and how are you feeling about him now??? has he tried to make contact?



  • yeh he also said i should learn how to count!( the condoms)



  • zendi,

    sorry you already said it had been seven months. i think scorpios tend to put people they love through a series of tests... it sounds like he was serious about you if he had asked you to move in. but it sounds like he is very afraid of losing you and maybe is thinking he will never have enough money to support the kind of lifestyle that would make you happy. scorpios also dont believe in having to support a woman either. mine was always talking about equality. i think he has some negative views on women.. thinking that alot of them are just out for mens money and se;x.

    again his insecurity. could be that he sensed you ahving more power than him. and he felt threatened. scorpios also when in relationship look far far down the line.. but he may not have told you any of it. they keep alot to themselves. mine said to me that he cant commit to someone who wants to go travelling all the time. it started out very intense with mine also... spending alot of time together. he never wanted to go out with his friends and stayed home with me.. but i think simmering inside of him was also a feeling that he was missing out on being a man.. on having fun, but he felt he had to be loyal to me. like he built a cage for himself then accused me of witholding the key. two spend too much time together it will combust at some point. and like the scorpionic birth death rebirth theme... they rise out of the ashes as the pheonix. but they need to surrender their ego at some point. this is usually done in the death phase..

    i actually think alot of it stems from who they feel they are as men and fulfilling that role.alot of it is also about procreation. .



  • i am a scorpio, A Major SCORPIO.....plz everyone do not generalize....or stereotype, each individual is so different.....



  • my father is a MAJor scorpio and is married to my mother for over 50 years who is an aquarius, he has been loyal to her and provides her with everything and anything she wishes for....So you see....cannot generalyze here my friends.....Scorpio men want total control but they will take care of theyre women...i have a lot of insight for you as i am looking in a mirror with scorpio, and i know it all to well.. however we are insecure in a sense, very, very sensitive and if we feel attacked, or like others are talking about us or not trusting us that is quite another story.....zendi gimme a few to read more of your scenario.....

    Nikki



  • Stranger, mine always stressed equality. Scorpios ( i dated three this last year and not on purpose) are intense and go after what they want with full force and once they get it they put it on auto pilot, stop trying so hard and stop focusing on their partner. They can be very self-absorbed also. I found that my guy is stubborn and doesn't really express what he feels, when that would be the way he could make progress in getting what he wants (having his cake and eating it too)!

    My thoughts are in this new moon, when out with old in with the new are here, it means do something different, change something, an action, a thought, take a new perspective, etc.. and move forward.

    Peace



  • i like pisces for some reason, and this is what i had to do....If ever i have forgotten, or lost myself, it bites you, you can never lose yourself and believe mE i ama lover and hopeless romantic......IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING,,,SET IT FREE, get back into urself, self love, whatever it takes and WATCH what happens.......if it is MEANT TO BE..IT WILL BE, I PROMISE YOU.......

    KIND REGARDS,

    NIKKI



  • Ashynikki, i know you are right, because i've seen this scorpio man take good care of me, he tried to do everything I wanted and asked for...he really did, except he stopped trying so hard and put me on auto pilot. Seven months is not enough time to put a relationship on auto pilot.. Not trying to generalize about scorpio men and aquarius women,

    my mistrust began a few months ago, when he couldn't tell me that a call he took was from a woman he is in school with. She called two weekend nights in a row.. I felt he should have taken the call in front of me, and handled whatever she wanted (he said it was school related and she had questions about the assignment and was freaking out about it), but he ignored the call when he saw it was from her and then texted her, and when I asked who called and, he said no one. then he said it was xxxxx. (her name). It took him several times to not lie to me about this call, as i kept asking him why he wouldnt answer, and he didn't have an answer. Why would she call after 9 on a weekend night about school, couldnt she have texted him?? This is when my mistrust came into play and then it grew progressively to the point where two condoms are missing and he said I miscounted.

    thoughts??



  • I agree and only good can come from that!



  • yes, i've been they're with the love of my life, and my thoughts are if you wanna play games, do it without me, they will learn and if they really love you come back, and some can change. He may not be your best match, i feel it's driving you crazy so i cannot stress enough to pull back, DO YOU, and wait it out....I know it sux but i understand due to my own circumstances, you are attracted to him....What is his age???



  • You have to workout, stay healthy, be fulfilled with you, in the meantime, it's a win win......



  • but mostly let him know your serious, don't give in.....waiting game, preoccupy urself........:)



  • I am so serious about my distance and I want him to know. I told him I needed time and space.



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