A huge life altering decision (but cool!!!)
So, I've been thinking about being a gestational surrogate (their eggs, my uterus) for years now. I have been presented with an opportunity to go for it for a friend who is an amazing parent. I'm leaning towards it but wondering if you see anything regarding it. :0)
You would regret it. Despite the reward of giving it will feed the demon you still carry that gathers pain. You need to be at peace with your abandonment issues. This kind of giving requires a giver who never dwells on regret and feels complete with herself. I pick up that despite your big heart you have dark days of lonelyness and isolation. You are not always sure of yourself and could invite regret and loss into your thoughts during these times. You are unsure right now and asking for insight for a reason. Be honest with yourself. Consider not just what you desire but know also who you are. Blessings
You are right. I think I was really just moved by what a phenominal gift it would be to give them the chance at another child since I've watched them try so hard for so many years. I think that in a way, there was a fog of joy that limited my abiltiy to see that its possible that I was trying to heal my own loss by giving life to someone else.
I am isolated, that's definitely true but I don't necessarily think I'm lonely (although, I would love for someone to rub this knot out of my neck!)! More often than not I loooove my space and doing what I do without having to answer to anyone! All in all you are right, it's not the time to do it. Maybe down the road... I was so focused on the joy that I forgot to think about hte negative aspects. You are also right in that it might be painful emotionally since I always wanted more children but didn't get them. Thank you for your honest response. I needed that! :0)
Today was a pivotal day in my considering this (just kind of an amped up day, waiting to hear back from a friend) so it's funny that you responded the same way I kind of starting to feel. Thank you, thank you thank you!!!!