Cancer male talked about disappearing
NEWS AT 11! I wrote this topic a while ago: http://www.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=5971&replies=13&totalitems=13
Summary: I'm a gemini female, him a cancer male. We did not speak for 2 months because I was made as helI that he wouldn't respond when I asked if he was still interested in me and then called me "STALKERISH".
Until one day a couple weeks ago, I decided to call him and say hello (I had a dream about him that made me feel like I should be in touch with him again.. weird!) We talked for a bit but did not talk about the 2 month disconnection or anything related.
He invited me out to lunch about a week later where he treated because he felt bad about what happened. We briefly talked about it and we apologized for neither of us handling it properly.
About little less than a week again I was invited over to his house. It was there he brought up what happened between us again (I hadn't mentioned it since we went out to lunch). He explained when I texted him asking how he felt that he had a mini panic attack and when I sent the email the same thing happened.
*Note: He got out of a bad relationship around last November and is still trying to get his life back on track from it.
He said that there will be times where he needs space and when he means space he means like potentially a month or so. He explained how highly he thought of me and what happened between us upset him and he felt really bad about it. He said that things moved so fast between us that it freaked him out because he didn't know what it was and didn't want it to be a rebound. I explained to him that it may take me time to warm back up to him because I've been disconnected from him for a while now (I was ready to delete him from my life) but he responded that that may not be such a bad thing to which I agreed. He said not to sound weird but he thinks of me as family because I've met his actual family, his friends, and been to his home. We agreed that we need to learn how each other reacts and try to adapt/learn to handle when we do. He was relieved to know that I forgave him for what happened (he often says that he worries certain things will upset me).
The talk was good as I feel like we cleared a lot up and he did on his part too. I did not bring up what happened to us at any point, he initiated the conversation about what happened each time. We both agreed that we need to have open lines of communication and provide each other with plenty of space as needed.
So that's my story on my disappearing cancer for now. I thought I would post this since there are so many Cancer posts that talk about their disappearing acts :]
Everything happens for a reason, and often we as the other party than our cancer male dont always see it straight away. What follows is every thing happens for a reason. The reason will be shown when it had ripen and when we´re fully ready for it. ....................at least I think so.
I am so happy to hear that there are more "horror" stories about
Cancer men! I was with one for almost 3 years until, it was my turn to tell him that I couldnt take it anymore. I had always given him the space and alone time that he needed. The first time that we broke up it took a week and then we decided to be "just friends", well let me tell you that the friendship was no different than when we were in relationship, we did all the same things, but whatever made him feel comfortable, I was willing to go along with because I was in love with him. Then after some time, he decided that since we were the same as before, that we were in a relationship again! ugh.. that went on again for sometime and he decided that we should break up again. Well after many nights of tears (on my part) he called me again and said that he missed me and could we be friends. Of course I took him because again, I was in love with him and knew that he loved me too, or he was a very good actor. this again went on for sometime a couple of months went by and out of the clear blue.... he stopped talking to me. We work at the same place so you can imagine my frustration that the man would walk past me at work and not even look at me. 3 months of this went by with me trying to communicate and ask what I did when one day out of the blue he called me and told me that the last 3 months had been hell for him. He loved me, couldnt live without me, and wanted to marry me ASAP. Needless to say, I was ecstatic! This is what I had dreamed of I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. 2 days later he called and said ummmmm maybe that wouldnt work out because of my daughter and how was I goiing to be able to take care of her and him? Again, I was devastated, but like the fool I was remained friends with him and when we were in any form of our relationship, we talked all the time. Finally, 6 months ago, he lied to me and told me he was going to his brothers for the weekend and when the weekend was done he called me to tell me that he lied to me and had been out with his ex-girlfriend who he had not seen for 3 years and only dated for 6 months . I was done. I wrote him a letter and let him know that there was no way that I was going to be able to be friends with him and watch him date other women! (he hadnt dated anyone in our 3 years together) that i of anyway. Well, now that I was the one to turn my back on him......he will not look, speak, or be in the same area as me. We work together. It is very difficult for us at work to not run into each other at some point. I have had to speak to him with work related things along the way, and he wont aknowledge me at all. He looks at the wall as if he is hearing voices. WTH!!!! I makes me sad, and I wish sometimes that I could have him back in my life, but the heartache that goes with it all is too much.
So it is great to see that this pattern seems to be a Cancer male thing. Always retracting inside their shells when something scares them. Anyway thats all, have a great day e-1