The Enchanted Pond
Hello to all!
I have been a little out of it on the tarot.com community, I'm sorry!
Before I write more, I wanted to say that I instantly thought of you LC this evening, when there was a piece on the news tonight (Friday) about a little 5 year old boy with leukemia who wanted to be Batman. I was thinking that the grown-up Batman who was helping out could have been you! I know you would have done it
Things have been superbusy since we came back from our trip. My part-time job got extra busy and we had lots of planning going on for my retirement party. My hub's bladder cancer returned, so we had to catch up with appointments leading up to that surgery. I think the cancer is small and will be surgically removed, so, although it is scary and upsetting, it was not unexpected. He is a uneasy about it but can't remember all the details so is always thinking he is going out somewhere to something he can't remember. So it's quite a big time job managing all that.
My retirement party was so FuN...yowza...a lot of people came and said many very very nice things about me, which was really ....well, Awesome. I am not the kind of person who is very at-ease with that kind of thing, but I really enjoyed the evening immensely. I felt very honored by the people attending and their very loving vibes to me.
I am saddened to hear what has been happening to you Sunshine, with the report of the findings regarding Michael's fatal accident, and to you Icey, with this horrible situation in your life. Blmoon, how wonderful that you have given such good and uplifting information and readings for them, just at the right time. Blessings to you!
Icey...I had to go back some pages here to read all that you had written, esp. about your 3 or 4 year-old-self. wow...You are a starbeam for sure and made of stardust. I started reading some of Pleadian (sp) Prophecies a while ago and you remind me of them!
Life is a mystery for sure...sometimes we are but passengers on the light. I know that when I try to take care of myself, as Blmoon suggests, things do seem to look better, and I am more able to hear 'my angels' when my mind is calm. I hope that you can get some rest and all your children to reach out to you and care for you too!!
So....I wanted to share a dream I had after returning from Italy. In my dream, I was in a garden with a courtyard. It was warm and in the evening. I was alone, but it wasn't a bad or scary feeling. I looked through some shrubbery and saw the face of a Samurai warrior, who was sitting behind the bush and watching me. When I acknowledged him, he came out and approached me with great humility. (Funny how you know stuff in dreams....) He told me that he had come to serve me (and protect me). When I asked why, he said that I was worthy and that I deserved his loyalty. I think I kind of woke up but went back to the dream, and on the horizon saw three Japanese people in traditional dress walking along in silhouette. When I acknowledged them, they turned and came to stand in front of me, telling me that they would serve me.
This dream had quite a powerful effect on me...as a 'TWO' on the enneagram, when I am operating on 'instinct' and not understanding, I tend to act as a person who is unworthy of being loved... After the dream.I cried for a few days whenever I thought about it...but did really feel blessed by it. SO, I am just passing along that messages do get through to us one way or another
My time now as a retired person is slowly getting into a kind of schedule. Caring for my hub is taking more of my time than I had been thinking would be necessary, but he is amenable to things I want to do. I have been trying to clean clean clean and finish painting the leftover walls and floors left undone on our renovation last year. My energy is returning and I am enjoying that!!
I wish I could package up some light and send it out to you...after all the support I have received over the years from you all, it's the least I can do. Here goes: <<<<< />>>>>>
Still hanging out with the birds and blooms!
Hugs from Bloom xoxo
It's the B-oom/ns!!!!! Hi Bloom & Blmoon ... so wonderful for both of you to be here simply shining the pond all up!
Blmoon ... I want to give you the biggest angel hug, send you flowers and sprinkle moonbeams all over your beautiful soul. I cannot believe that you would be so kind to me ... I am truly touched. I will also speak with you more shortly ... I printed out the messages (very sneakily at work) you have posted here so that I could spend some time with them; feeling what is within them. Thank you is so inadequate Blmoon for what you have given me but my soul truly does shower you with loving thanks. There is no greater gift than one of love and hope. Blessings and a whole sky full of stars to wish upon to you.
And Bloom ... our beautiful Bloom ... so glad that you are still hanging out with the birds and blooms ... it is just sooooooo YOU! Your life has been; and still is, so FULL and, in true Bloom style, you hold the most amazing perspective of your life. It is rare to meet someone who can remain in the now whilst honouring the bigger picture too. You really are a grand enchanted sister indeed.
How horrid for your hub to now be facing another major health set back. I was just so sorry to read this, Bloom. Your house-hold has endured more than its fair share these last 12 months; I am so holding the energy that change, good health and abundant blessings are on the horizon now for you ... and him. Please give him an extra big angel hug from me (and then hold a bouquet of them from me to you too).
I am thrilled that your retirement party brought you so much JOY, Bloom! It is just so heart-warming to hear other souls recognize the true beauty of another soul. Your very well deserved honour is so special and I'm glad that you have received this with open heart & arms. Go stand in your sunlight and keep being fabulous. I just LOVE the sound of your recognition and joy. Big happiness to you.
So weird that you mention Pleiadian Prophecies my sweet friend ... for this is my FAVOURITE section of our beloved Universe. I adore the Pleiades and, whilst in my development circle all those moons ago, spent a lot of time learning to connect with this star energy. I simply LOVE this gorgeous place and have been told before that I am from there. How beautiful of you to say something so moving. Thank you. I hadn't thought of this for soooooo long - how wonderfully timely to be reminded so lovingly of something so amazing. You are truly special to me, Bloom. Oh, do we think our Sister Queenie Laie knew something when she added "Moonbeam" to my name????? LOL
Hmmm ... my 3 year old self ... yes, well ... there is probably much your 'Psych" hat could say about all this ... I could hear all my training in the back of my head too ... abandonment issues, fear of being alone, isolated, yadda yadda yadda ... LOL but, one other thing happened when I was this small. I had a book of maps (of countries and the world etc;) that I used to look through and I vividly remember pointing to a huge mass of green on a map and saying I want to live there! I cut this map out, put it in my special little box that I kept under my bed and looked at it lovingly looked at whenever I felt sad or lonely. Guess where it was I cut out????? And you all know me so well, don't you? It was Canada. The irony right???
But your DREAM! Oh My Goodness! How powerful and how superbly HONOURING! Bloom; this was incredible. I am so glad that you have met some more Guardians of yours ... especially ones so powerfully strong and gentle as these. You have truly covered the balanced spectrum ... the feminine with the masculine, the fearless with the shy, the warrior with the gentle, the power of one and three, and all there to serve you ... to protect and guide ... YOU! I would've cried just thinking about all of this too ... lots! LOL It is deeply moving to be honoured by our own self isn't it? And yes ... I am always amazed at how one always knows and understands so much within a dream ... everything just makes sense, doesn't it?
I thank you for giving this gift to me also ... of reminding me of the importance of stillness and how messages somehow always get through. I am touched. I am aware that the deeper we are pulled into the emotion; the more impossible it is to sense spirit. Spirit's energy is light and emotion, extremely dense ... it takes a lot to bring the two together when we are filled with such earthiness. Blmoon mentioning not seeing the forest for the trees is a big truth ... and one I do understand very well. As you put it to Blmoon ... both of you have given very "uplifting" assistance and I am speechless by such kindness.
Your package of 'light' was received with immense thanks and I send loving sparkly moonbeams back to you.
I am about a hundred pages into my "Dark Nights of the Soul" book (it arrived on the day of my w/anniversary ... divine timing do we think???) and the jury is a bit out on this so far. Some of Moore's messages are inspired and insightful and filled with spirit and other things he has posed just anger me and I think, oh prove it. Not sure what to make of it all but, there's a whole lot of book to go and I obviously needed to read it for a reason ... need to give it some time to unfold and hopefully, the meaning will become clear. Have you read this one, Bloom???? Tis heavy going.
I am always glad when you stop by at the pond for I have truly learnt a lot from you. Actually, I feel this way about all of our Enchanted Family ... and that includes you Blmoon ... you are forever now an Enchanted Sister Queenie Soul round here. Huge angel hug welcome to our family.
Blmoon ... are you able to reach me on the --- ---- y a h o o d o t c o m d o t a u I posted a few pages ago? Please and thank you ... I want to say something to you in private. If that's not possible, then no worries. You are an angel and I thank you so very much.
May the sun, moon and stars beam down upon you all and show you just how gorgeous a soul you each are!
Love you all.
Your Icey Moonbeam x x x
For each of you ...
happy full moon in Taurus and in Scorpio sun! That's one mighty moon!! Enjoy!
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLMOON ... ANYONE ....... PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG! OMG! OMG!
I have just discovered the lie! My kids have now been told what's going on and my world is spinning so out of control I want to die right now. My x and he is well and truly a big X now has been having a phone affair with someone back home in Melbourne for the past few months. I saw her semi naked photos on his phone this morning and he finally told me about her. He says he doesn't love her ... by the way, she is an ex girlfriend from before me and I know her. She was a part of the group we all hung around in when we were first going out. I am such a f******* IDIOT! I AM SUCH A F********************* FOOL! No physical relationship between them ... YET! Holy F**************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is this?????????????????????????????????????
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I need help here ... I can't stop shaking and my heart / chest has such pain it I think I am going to collapse. What the F****K??????????????????????????????????????????
I never ask 'what next? Look where that got me? PLEASE ........... someone ..................... HELP ME! I am soooooooo ready to pack it in. My kids are a mess. I am a mess.
Icey!!! I am here, and I am sooo sad to hear about what has been going down in your neck of the woods. Being here is not the same as being there, but know I am sending you all the Light, hugs and the Blessings you need right now. I feel the emotions around you, and I have to admit that I don’t have any perfect platitudes to quote you...there are none for this situation. Just know that I am here and will gladly be here to talk to you. And you are not a f****** idiot or a fool, you are a sister that is loved very much who is in a situation that someone dragged you into. I hope you and your children can stay together and focus upon keeping each other’s heads above water when you have reached the end of your rope. Do you have my address still. my name here is the same herewith the numbers at h o t m a i l d o t c o m.
I did not want to put that info online as I assumed you knew or suspected already---- that's why I thought you wished to speak in private. It also validates spirits message about ignoring your x
and the message that he IS finding out this temptation is not who he thought she is---and I got a THEY so he's gotten close to a group or several people who he's been influenced by. Remember the warning about your help. You will be ok. There is so much s exting---and online relationships going on. You are not alone in this issue!! Allow your emotions but please do something constructive with your anger----and do not beat yourself up. You are not a fool---why would you think something like that was going on. You have an open heart---there was still trust. Be good to yourself---I promise the pain will pass. You are not alone and you are loved!
warning about your HEALTH! Sorry--it's late.
Oh Sister Sun and Blmoon,
Thank you sooooooo VERY much for reaching out to me like this. I called my only friend over here & Perth and she came & picked me up and we have been drinking together ever since. I have since come home and there has been more screaming and yelling and well ... who gives a sh*t right? I am now sleeping on the couch for Lord knows how long and my kids have survived ground zero and day one ... some better than others and I am still quite full of alcohol (which is a VERY good thing right now because my soul is even more shattered than it was before ... is that even possible????? probably but I can't feel anything anymore! and that is a GREAT thing ... not just good but GREAT!). My friend will come get me tomorrow too which is soooooooooo lovely of her because I need someone right now.
Blmoon ... I seriously had NO idea my love! None at all! So trusting and naïve am I!!!!!!!!!!!!! HA! Good joke on me right? I NEVER look at his phone (never thought there'd be a need to another HA!) but when I went to unplug his phone to charge mine up, something made me do it. I saw these love hearts and that he had been sent three new photos by this one person and I thought ... wow ... that's odd and I looked! Well! Sure shocked me! Apparently, according to him, I was NEVER meant to know! Heard that before ...hmmmm???? He didn't want to 'hurt' me further ... hmmmmmmmm .... and he has bared his soul and cried and do you know what????? Like a f***n idiot, I still believe him and feel empathy for him and even told him I forgive him. Am I NOT the biggest idiot on the planet????? I actually am! I believe that! I believe I am a Fn fool! Oh well ... I figure someone wanted me to know and that's how it was meant to play out and, although I feel hugely sick, it needed to come out. Even though he looked me dead in the eye, tears flowing everywhere when I asked him, he lied straight to my face and said there was no-one else! Because, for the whole 28 years we have been together, this was always our one big no-no ... I never thought it would happen! I thought he would never cheat on me because it was like the worse thing we both agreed the other could do. Am I not a fool? I feel it. I feel just like it! I am not accepting blame and I am not attributing any to me either ... I have done nothing wrong other than love someone completely. This is HIS issue, not mine. I just feel positively stupid for not seeing it.
Blmoon ... you are right. Apparently, I found out today, that I have been BLOCKED on his facebook page. I didn't even know I was! He has, in the last few months, gotten in touch with the 'old' group ... now I know why! he has been getting closer to her around a few weeks before he actually told me he was leaving. Gosh I feel stupid! Didn't even know my husband has blocked me from anything ... never even entered my head that he would ever do such a thing. I am the most loving, trusting soul and, because of this, I get walked all over! They sure made fools of me. He even texted her today to say that I found out and that "I know!" Love that one!!!!!!! Oh, he deleted her photos too! Big whoop huh? How respectful right?????????????? LOL
I am such an idiot! Again, no blame is mine as I KNOW, like I KNOW, that I did nothing wrong, or anything to deserve this ... but I feel stupid! And, funnily enough, this is the ONLY thing I feel! Cannot even feel my eyes anymore ... just that in my soul I have been an absolute fool.
You wrote so many things to me Blmoon that, kept a spark off hope, alive within me. I did wish to speak with you in private - just not about this because I didn't even know there was a 'this'! I wanted to thank you as my real self and not a Tarot.com self for being the only spiritual person not to abandon me and my cries for help! I had much I wanted to ask you that I wanted to keep out of this pond but ... it's all out now anyway. Everyone can know because, really, whatever! I am sooooooooooo I don't know what anymore but hey ... there are no more secrets and lies now (at least I f*****n hope not?????) .............. from this day forward, I move forward. Well, ok .... maybe tomorrow for today is a bit useless now! LOL
I still LOVE this man and truth be told, probably will for the rest of my life. Will he realize his mistake? I believe so. I really do. Will he ever come back to me?????????????? I want you to say he will come back. and I want you to tell me all will be ok. But it won't be, will it? Something absolutely compelled me to look at his phone today and I would NEVER do that normally but, someone wanted me to know. I believe that! The truth needed to come out. The irony???? I have this cushion on my couch that has a bird flying free from a cage that says the truth will set you free! If this wasn't so painful this would almost be funny.
And yet ... I am numb!
Thank you to both my gorgeous Sisters of Soul for holding me in your hearts during this awfully dark time for me ... I NEEDED YOU ... really needed YOU ... and I am soooooooooooo grateful you were both there! Thank YOU and I LOVE you both!
Please tell me there is good in this world? Please tell me that I will meet someone else who will affirm all I believe in men and humanity?
I know trhat I WILL SURVIVE BGECAUSE I Have always been a survivor. I know thatvlife will go on and I shall go on and all will be s it should be. I have drunmk a lot. Ilobve you and I lobve Love! Help me ... ????? Yews, I need help. I am aleready sick Blmoon. I have had etests and the Dr's keep ringing me to come in and discuss my results. Today, I bhave had bthe severisat pains in my eright pelvis side ever. It has doubled me over and I have said Oh God! I never say that!
Anywho ... according to the Dr who did my ultrasound a few weeks ago, my entite left side (as in ovary) is o0ne big cyst. My right side is one big pain in my side! Literallllly. . Need ton go now so chat again tomorrow.
Lover you al;l.
Icey Moonbeams x x x
Please forgive my drunken ramble ... and all those spelling mistakes. LOL Yikes ... dreadful English teacher stuff that was. I am quite embarrassed about my posting such an awful thing at the pond and I hope, in time, you will all forgive me for that!
Yesterday was so awful; so hard and so disgusting. But I did live through it, right? Albeit not very well ... or with much class! But, it is what it is and this morning (for I have not slept at all), I found him lying in our bed (I stayed on the couch) TALKING TO HER ON HIS PHONE! I sent her a not so nice text message at 2 this morning and she's been texting him ever since ... panicking that I've killed him and am going to kill her! What a mess! You are right Blmoon ... he is repeatedly saying he's not even sure if he wants her ... or if she's right for him or whatever. He is one conflicted individual and he has become trapped in his own unhappiness and, call me stupid (because I really am) ... I feel sorry for him and I want to help him. It's pathetic. I cannot feel today ... apart from the constant wanting to throw up ... self inflicted I know but, oh well to that! I cannot cry, or feel or think all that well (more than a little hung over I suppose too) but I have taken control ... of my life anyway. I am in control of how I respond to things and how I decide things and, after this disgusting scene at 5 this morning where I screamed and slammed the door when I heard him talking to her on the phone from bed, I am laying down rules.
We have hurt our children VERY badly and there is so much lasting hurt here ... and that makes me feel sick too.
I said some awful things to him and that makes me feel sick also. Really sick.
Trust issues you say Blmoon? Big tick I think for I am blindingly suspicious of everything now; whereas I have NEVER needed to be before ... never even entertained the idea, why would I? Now I just feel sick when this rises within me ... the absolute death of the self here. That's how this is felt.
The 'I' has died.
I was never meant to know huh? Ummmm ... ya reckon? He never meant to hurt me so badly ... he never wanted to. Those words kind of sting too. Seeing tears in his eyes, hurts me too. It shouldn't, right? But, it does. Everything is so upside down. I have been shaken out.
I take heed of your messages from Spirit, Blmoon. They, apart from all of you, are all I have to get me through this next part.
Please call me "Icey" ... icearia is way too formal here at the pond.
May something loving bless you, Sister Sun and everyone today. Thank you for being there for me! I am deeply grateful.
There are few words to soothe now. I'm so sorry you have been so hurt. you are no F.. idiot, you loved genuinely & full heartedly...many live a life time unable to love. Perhaps focusing on yourself & your children to heal & regroup would be helpful. Time is on your side... no 2 people have the same experience but I have had my heart broken & although at the time is was so painful I couldn't imagine or see beyond the pain as time evovled I healed & could see a new path. You are loved & cherished here, we will hold you in our hearts. So glad you reached out to us
Blessings to all
I count my blessings every day here at the pond. This is torturous to say the least and, when I thought it couldn't get any worse, well ... it sure did right? It may not have been a physical affair but it was going on BEFORE he even told me he was leaving. The whole thing just makes me sick; so so sick. I can't even look at him without wondering what he has spoken about with her and all that other bull*^%# that fills one's head when betrayal like this and lies like this finally come out. I just feel so sick!
Yes, the focus IS on the kids and self now ... it has to be. He is still living here obviously and it is I who will be leaving as I cannot bare to be here knowing what he is continuing to do behind my back. Makes me sick, sick and sick ... and boy did I get angry! I still don't hate him (almost wish I could) because, as you and many others have pointed out, one cannot turn off one's heart just like that. He wrestled with doing this (as in deciding to leave me) right up until he actually told me, he said. Hmmmm? So hard to believe anything really, isn't it? Who knows anymore. I feel so betrayed and hurt. Ok ... leave if you must but this too????????????? REALLY??????????????? So much for respecting me and all those lies huh? Whatever.
I feel comforted by my enchanted friends ... really comforted. Cannot scoop you all up enough to hug you lovingly. Thanks to each of you for helping me take one step at a time. Thanks so much.
So very sorry for all your past hurts too ... life's lessons come painfully don't some of them? Sending you love, Lotus.
Sunshine reaching out to you to let you know I am here. I am so very sorry about you going through all of this. Breaking up a relationship that has lasted as long as yours is really not easy, no matter how you slice it. I can only imagine how the children are feeling. Be with them as well, and you all can get through this one together.
I realize that living there under the same roof is difficult for you right now, it would be just as hard for me. It’s natural that you don’t hate him, you have too loving and kind a heart for that, plus all the years you have been together factors in too. I am sending you much light and Love Icey. You are and have absolutely been an Angel, to us and to others. Things like this can change us a lot, but don’t change that loving, Angelic part of you. It is easy to grow cynical because of betrayal. I know, I’ve been there . Many things about you will change because of all this, but don’t lose everything.
Please let your Pond friends and family help you. Don’t be afraid to come in and talk to us. After all...we have all talked to you at one time or another about our troubles, now it is your turn, use it. We love you Icey Don’t forget.
I hope you are in good health and enjoying your day. I never welcomed you to our little Pond, so Welcome. I hope you have found our group of friends here to be good and fine individuals. I hope you stay around and schmooze with us now and them. We are good people.
Blessings for you for taking time with me and Icey during our rough moments. It is hard being human sometimes.
Love and Light to you.
Lotus, Laie, LC, Bloom2, love you all and sending you sunshine’s special love and light package. Thinking about you all and hoping you have a wonderful day ahead of you.
Quick stop by to hug my Pond family. Lots of healing happening here, physical & emotional Collectively we can face these challenges head on knowing the loving power of the Pond has our backs.
Blmoon I too want to extend a warm welcome - you've been so warm & generous with your support to Sunshine & Icey & for that I am most thankful Welcome new friend
"May your today glow with your inner self's light."
Will he ever get his Sh*** together? Probably not! I am so sorry you have experienced this betrayal, for that's what it is. My sister unfortunately had the same experience, where her husband left her and ended up marrying her best friend. It is soooo hard to deal with, especially since you are still seeing each other it seems daily.
You are very VERY LOVED here at the POND, and we all want you to take care of yourself....and heed those concerns of your doctor.
Whether you decide to get together again some day, that is in the future. What you have is today, your health, your kids...Bob the bird and many others who you have touched and helped here and I'm sure in other places. We know you only as YOU, not as a wife or mother...and we find you immensely wise and helpful!!
We are all sending you love and light...this IS the Enchanted Pond, n'est-ce pas? We can put our stuff here and send out the first tiny waves of healing for each other.
Please please take care of yourself and take advantage of any health insurance benefits that you can (sorry I don't know your nation's health care plan!).
One positive thing you can do for yourself is find out about some (free?) legal aid to see what you can do to protect yourself and your kids financially.
Hugs to Sunshine, Blmoon, Lotus, Laie, LC. Thanks for the Sunshine, sunny. Lots of big hugs.
Blmoon, i spoke to you in another thread, one I created about an issue I was having with my Gemini love, I was wondering if you have any new insights?
And Icey, I am so very sorry that he hurt you this way...you are in my thoughts
good to see you in the Pond. Hoping that everything works out for you and you have great success in your life.